


Introductory Robotics

by Birdz555



Category: Tiger & Bunny
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Mature Student!Kotetsu, Professor!Barnaby, Slow Build, something like a romantic comedy/slice of life story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-24
Updated: 2017-03-12
Packaged: 2018-04-23 03:42:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 46,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4861685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Birdz555/pseuds/Birdz555
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kotetsu chooses a course in Introductory Robotics as his science elective for his first semester at university. Professor Barnaby is pleasantly surprised when an older student comes to talk with him after class.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Way With Words

**Author's Note:**

> My first Tiger & Bunny fic! I am very excited (and nervous) to share this with you. I apologize if there are any inaccuracies when it comes to the robotics terms and associated course work. Please take it with a grain of salt. Other than that, I hope you enjoy! :D

            Kotetsu sighed. Resting his elbow on the desk and leaning his face on his hand, he looked across the sea of young people surrounding him. Bright-eyed, chatting up a storm, their voices echoed through the lecture hall. Leaving him to drown in their youth. He supposed that’s what he gets for choosing a robotics course as his science elective. It’s a field bound to attract bright, young minds.

            “What am I even doing here?” Kotetsu muttered to himself. He flipped to the inside front cover of his notebook where he had taped a picture of his daughter. Kaede was wearing a bright blue sundress and a large white hat. It almost covered her brown eyes, but you could still see them, shining brightly at the person holding the camera. He sighed again and turned to the back inside cover.

            A woman with long brown hair held a baby in her arms. The picture was slightly ripped in several places and a bit crumpled but you could still see the love in the eyes of the subject. Her wide smile complimented her face well.

            Kotetsu caressed her face in the photo with his right index finger. He whispered her name as the microphone was tapped twice.

            “Good morning, everyone.” The professor spoke. “My name is Barnaby Brooks Jr. Welcome to your first class in Introductory Robotics.”

            Kotetsu turned his notebook back to the page where his pen was. From his seat in the middle of the lecture hall, he could make out his professor’s blonde hair and classy red suit jacket over a black dress shirt. However he couldn’t see his face. From the sound of his voice, he was definitely young.

            _I’m probably older than he is_ , Kotetsu mused.

            “If you could please take a look at the syllabus that’s being handed out, I’ll go over some of the key things.” The professor said.

            After taking a sheet, Kotetsu passed the rest of the pile of papers down the row. He read over the topics they were going to cover. The substantial list included such points as ‘Planar and Spatial Kinematics’ and ‘Control Design’, along with a host of other unfamiliar terms. It made Kotetsu’s head spin.

            “As you can see, we’ll be covering a number of topics – ” Professor Brooks paused to adjust the zoom on the document camera. “Hopefully at least one of them sparks your interest.” A small laugh broke across the otherwise silent hall. Kotetsu couldn’t help but smile.

            The professor continued by summarizing each subject in turn, adding to what was written on the syllabus. He took what few questions there were in this beginning lecture and answered each with care. Kotetsu jotted down a few notes and definitions, hoping he wouldn’t be so lost when he started studying. Although, having had the terms explained and expanded upon, Kotetsu felt a little better.

 _But if I find I can’t follow the lectures...I suppose I can always drop this and pick up another science course?_ But that would mean talking to his program counsellor, and filling out forms most likely. None of that appealed to Kotetsu. He glanced at the clock, expecting to have a good chunk of time still to go, but half an hour had passed since the lecture commenced. Had it really been that long? Kotetsu could have sworn it had only been ten minutes since they’d started.

            Professor Brooks finished going over the syllabus and changed the projector’s display to his computer screen.

            “So, it seems we’ve still got twenty minutes left,” Professor Brooks stated. “Let’s dive right in, shall we?” He brought up the first slide – _What is Robotics?_

“Robotics is a field of great potential.” He began. “You can make robots to build things; you can make robots to break things. You can create complex robots to do simple tasks and vice versa. If every one of you in this room designed a robot, none of them would be exactly the same. And that potential is what I think makes this field amazing.”

            Kotetsu could hear the passion in Professor Brooks’ voice as he spoke. His enthusiasm was infectious – excitement grew within Kotetsu as the professor continued.

            “The robots we design and create today can affect the lives of so many people. They have been created to assist with the mundane tasks of everyday life. We’ve sent robots to other planets in order to explore and learn. And yes, even large robotic suits have been invented and seen use in helping people fight crime. And that is what I believe robotics is all about: designing and creating to help people.”

            And that was all Kotetsu needed to hear. He was hooked.

            As the lecture progressed, Kotetsu happily jotted down notes, enjoying the scratch of his pen on paper while others enjoyed the taps on their keyboards. The twenty minutes went by all too quickly, but it was enough to know that Kotetsu needed to talk face-to-face with this Barnaby Brooks Jr. Passion oozed from his lecturing voice, his hands gestured carefully to emphasize the important points. From the silence in the hall when he was talking, to the number of hands that shot up when he polled the class, Kotetsu knew he wasn’t the only one captivated. Throwing his things into his bag, he went against the flow of traffic to the bottom of the lecture hall.

            He couldn’t say he was surprised at the number of students congregating around the man. Their eager faces and sincere questions tore the professor’s gaze this way and that, sending his blonde curls bouncing around his face. Kotetsu hung back, suddenly self-conscious about his age, as he watched the younger students being herded out of the lecture hall by a smiling Barnaby.

            In the spacious entrance hall, Kotetsu leaned against a free patch of wall and sighed. Who was he amongst these teens and twenty-somethings? He was almost forty for goodness’ sake. Sure, he still had a future ahead of him, but he was somewhat of an old dog. He looked up at the ceiling and sighed again.

            “Oi, Kotetsu!” a baritone voice spoke up to his left, its owner waving as he approached. “Not getting disheartened on the first day, are you?”

            “No, no, Antonio,” Kotetsu chuckled. “Just waiting for my next class.” Antonio, a bull of a man with auburn hair, gave Kotetsu a look.

            “Don’t lie to me, Kotetsu. You told me you were free until 1:30, remember?”

            “A-ah, well...” he sighed.

            “Kotetsu – ”

            “Ah, I just had a very interesting class and can’t wait for the next one!” Kotetsu grinned. Antonio rolled his eyes, clearly not buying the excuse.

            “So, what class was that?”

            “Introductory robotics,” Kotetsu smiled. “I wasn’t expecting much, but the professor was very passionate about the subject.”

            “Was it Professor Brooks?” Antonio asked.

            “Eh? How’d you know?”

            “He’s been in the news a lot lately for his research. I knew he was a professor here, so I just hazarded a guess.”

            “You’re just lucky then?” Kotetsu laughed. “I could tell as he was lecturing that he’s got a lot of heart. Made me want to talk with him face-to-face.”

            “And?”

            “And...what?”

            “Did you talk to him?”

            “Ah..ha...well...” Kotetsu rubbed the back of his neck. “..no.”

            “Eh?” Antonio looked at Kotetsu in a state of disbelief. “Why not?”

            Kotetsu looked up, down, left, right, anywhere but Antonio’s expectant face. “Ah...”

            “Spit it out, Kotetsu.”

            He hesitated again. “Eh...he was surrounded by students after the lecture...he probably had somewhere he needed to be.” Kotetsu let out a strained laugh.

            “You felt old, didn’t you?” Kotetsu froze. “And that’s why you’re sulking over here.”

            “I’m not sulking! I was waiting to meet you!” Kotetsu crossed his arms.

            “You can sulk and wait at the same time!” Antonio sighed. “Anyway, how about getting that coffee you mentioned?”

            On the way to the campus coffee shop, Kotetsu asked about how the firehouse was doing, now that he’d left. Antonio told him about the new guy they’d hired and what an ass he was. Although he was good at his job, and could move pretty quickly. Kotetsu grumbled about how he’d been ‘replaced by a young person’. Antonio dismissed his concerns.

            “I don’t think he’ll last long here,” he admitted, lifting his coffee from the counter. “He keeps talking about how the pay isn’t high enough.”

            “You never know,” Kotetsu sipped on his coffee, jolting at the sudden heat on his tongue, “He might get a raise.”

          Antonio chuckled. “Ben-san doesn’t like him enough to give him a raise!”

            “You might get lucky then,” Kotetsu laughed. He had found them a place to sit at a high table next to the window. As their conversation lulled, Kotetsu stared outside, watching the students pass by. Some whizzed by on bicycles, others walked leisurely chatting with friends. More still rushed to get to unknown places for unknown times. But they were all so...

            “Am I really that old, Antonio?” Kotetsu asked, still looking out the window. Antonio let out a breath through his nose and turned to watch the students as well.

            “Is your hair greying?”

            “Not yet.”

            “Have you found yourself interested in Bingo or shuffleboard?”

            “Why do people always say Bingo is for old people?”

            Anotnio laughed. “How about this: do you want to stop learning?”

            “Eh?” Kotetsu looked up at his friend, who was giving him a look. “No, of course not. There’s still so much I don’t know.”

            “Then it doesn’t matter what your age is. It’s just a number, Kotetsu. Don’t let it stop you from living your life.” Antonio took a drink from his coffee. Kotetsu motioned to drink but set his cup down before taking a sip.

            “But what if – ”

            “No buts, Kotetsu. If taking up time from other students worries you so much, he’s probably alone in his office by now. Go pick his brain!” Antonio poked Kotetsu in the forehead.

            “Alright, alright, I’ll go!” Kotetsu waved at the air between them and drained the rest of his still pretty hot coffee. He crushed the paper cup. “But if he’s surrounded by young people, I’m leaving!”

            “Just wait your turn then, idiot!”

            “Bull-headed buffoon!”  
            “Tiger-tailed tot!”

            Kotetsu sniggered and they both burst out laughing, drawing a few stares and more glances from the busy cafe. He thanked Antonio for coming out to see him and wished him luck at work that evening.

            “If I see you next week and you tell me you didn’t see Professor Brooks, you’ll have to pay for more than just my coffee!” Antonio shot after Kotetsu as he was leaving. He simply waved and walked off to find Professor Barnaby’s office.

 

            As he got off the elevator, Kotetsu checked his syllabus one more time. He double checked on the sign on the wall opposite the elevators: Room 435 – Barnaby Brooks Jr. He followed the posted signs to a door in the corner of a hallway. It was closed, but not surrounded by young people. Kotetsu stopped a few metres from the door and internally ran through what he would say again.

            ‘ _Hello, my name is Kotetsu Kaburagi and I’d like to talk to you.’ Gah, maybe more specific? ‘and I’m in your introductory robotics class?’ What do I want to..._

Kotetsu was brought out of his thoughts by the sound of high heels clicking on the floor. He glanced around but couldn’t see anyone. He didn’t really want to wait around for them to see him standing awkwardly in the hallway. So he crossed over to the office and tentatively knocked on the door.

            “Come in,” came the answer from the other side. Kotetsu swallowed, cursing and thanking the fates at the same time. He turned the knob and pushed the door open.

            Professor Barnaby sat at his desk, a large wooden thing covered in neat stacks of binders, papers and magazines. The shelves on the wall above held small parts and projects among robotics texts. A blue toy robot next to a framed photo graced the bottom shelf on the side closest to the computer screens. The large window overlooking the rooftop illuminated the room with enough light that the professor had left the overhead lights off. He looked up from his monitor and couldn’t quite hide the surprised look from his face.

            “How can I assist you today?” Professor Barnaby asked, turning in his chair to face Kotetsu.

            “Ah, well..” Kotetsu removed his hat and turned it around in his hands. “My name is Kotetsu Kaburagi and I’m in your first year robotics class.”

            “The one at 10:30 this morning?”

            “Yes,” Kotetsu nodded. “I was hoping I could talk with you about some things.”

            “Of course, Kaburagi-san.” Professor Barnaby gestured to the seats in front of his desk. “Please have a seat.”

            “Ah, you don’t have to be so formal.” Kotetsu took the seat to his right. “Just Kotetsu is fine.”

            “Kotetsu-san, then.” He smiled. “Please feel free to call me Barnaby.”

            Kotetsu laughed. “It’s a bit weird for me to not call you Professor.”

            “Call me whatever you’re comfortable with,” Barnaby laughed a little. “Just don’t call me late to lecture.” He closed down whatever was on his computer screen. “Now, what did you want to talk to me about?”

            “Well, I,” Kotetsu paused, rethinking his question. “You don’t have to answer if this is too personal a question, but I can tell you have a lot of passion for robotics. Where does it come from?”

            Barnaby’s eyed widened for a moment but a smile soon softened his expression. “My parents.” He picked up the framed photo beside the blue toy robot and handed it to Kotetsu. “Their research has pioneered a new field in robotics. I grew up hearing their dreams and aspirations and they brought me in to visit their lab often.”

            Kotetsu handed back the photo of a teenaged Barnaby, standing with his parents behind a lab bench scattered with parts. He returned the frame to its place, gazing fondly at the image as he spoke.

            “They’ve accomplished most of their goals, but there are always more. I’ve made a few for myself of course.” He shrugged his shoulders briefly and turned back to Kotetsu. “No one’s really asked me that before. Everyone in the magazines and newspapers are focused more on the future and possible advancements than the past.” Barnaby smiled. Kotetsu couldn’t help but return the favour.

“I guess being older gives you a different perspective on things?” he chuckled.

            “Maybe,” Barnaby laughed. “So, am I allowed to ask why you’re taking an introductory robotics course? I don’t get many older students.”

            “That’s fair,” Kotetsu shrugged. “I threw out my back at work a couple of months ago. My boss urged me to go back to school and choose a different career so I wouldn’t hurt myself again. He even arranged to help pay for my schooling.” He fiddled with his hat. “I needed a science elective and I figured this course would have the least amount of calculus, haha.” Kotetsu rubbed the back of his neck and smiled honestly. Barnaby adjusted his glasses.

            “I hate to be the one to break this to you, Kotetsu-san, but, we do get into a fair bit of calculus.” He shrugged, his expression apologetic. Kotetsu’s eyes widened.

            “No, really?”

            “It’s nothing you’d need a computer for, but yes. Of course you’re always free to see me for help. Or your classmates.”

            Kotetsu rubbed his face with his left hand. “Ah,” he stopped, covering the bottom half of his face. “I don’t expect to be interacting with them that much.”

           “Hm...” Barnaby leaned back in his chair and brought a hand to his chin. He kept his eyes on Kotetsu for a moment before flicking to the wall underneath the shelves. Barnaby’s hand migrated to his glasses. “If you feel more comfortable one-on-one we could see about scheduling a time..?”

            Kotetsu lifted his head. “Like a private tutoring session?”

            Barnaby shrugged. “Something like that.” Kotetsu made a small, worried noise and Barnaby smirked. “Don’t worry. I don’t charge extra for that.”

            “Ha!” Kotetsu grinned. “That’s a relief. But is that really okay?”

            “Of course. I want to pass my passion to as many people as will stay and listen. And everyone deserves an equal chance to learn. You might need a bit more help since it’s been a while since you’ve done calculus, and that’s fine. I think it’s admirable you’ve come back to school.”

           “Heh, thanks.” Kotetsu smiled. “But that last bit was kind of a necessity. I need more training if I’m going to do a less physical demanding job.”

            “Nevertheless, I can understand the difficulties.” Barnaby cocked his head slightly to one side. “You never did mention what your old job was..?”

            “Oh, I was a firefighter!” Kotetsu set his hat on his lap and mimed holding a hose. “Whoosh, whoosh! Sweep at the base, try not to hit your colleagues!”

            Barnaby chuckled. “Is that how you threw your back out?”

            “Ah, no. Although I have been hit with the water before. It packs a punch!” Kotetsu punched the air. “No, I threw my back out trying to lift a ceiling beam off a person’s leg. Luckily my teammates were able to rescue both me and them. Heh. My boss was yelling at me as the ambulance drove away. ‘Why didn’t you wait for back-up?! Idiot! Get better soon!’ ”

            “And then he suggested you go back to school?” Barnaby asked.

            “Yeah.”

            A small silence paused their conversation. Kotetsu stared absentmindedly at some papers on Barnaby’s desk, reminiscing about the past. _Antonio could’ve been a bit gentler picking me up and carrying me out. Then again, the building was on fire and bound to collapse any minute._

            “So,” Barnaby spoke up, drawing Kotetsu’s gaze to his face. “What do you plan to do now?”

            “Well, I still want to help people. That’s my main goal.” _I made a promise._ “So I’m studying psychology to hopefully become a counselor. A grief counselor, to be more specific.” Kotetsu couldn’t help but fiddle with the ring on his left hand as he continued. “People can go through tough times in their lives when they lose someone. Some take it well, others might need some help working through it. If they need it, I’d like to be the person to help them.”

            Barnaby nodded in understanding. “I’m sure you’ll help a lot of people, Kotetsu-san.”

            “I hope so.”

            Another silence settled over the small office. Kotetsu rubbed his hands together just above his lap. _I did not expect to talk about this._ Barnaby leaned back in his chair, right hand under his chin, elbow on the armrest. Before the lack of conversation got too uncomfortable, he spoke.

            “So, are you free Thursdays around two?”

            “Uh..,” Kotetsu straightened and reached into his pocket. “Let’s see...” He unfolded a piece of paper and traced over the time slots of his schedule with his right index finger. “Yeah, I should be.”

            “Then let’s schedule your tutoring session then. Is that okay with you?”

            “Sure, that’s great. Hey, can I borrow a pen?” Kotetsu made a writing gesture with his hand.

            “Of course,” Barnaby selected a pen and offered it to Kotetsu.

            “Thanks,” He marked his schedule at the allotted time and returned the pen. “Well, I guess I should get going for today. Thanks again for agreeing to help me. I hope I won’t be a burden.”

            “Not at all.” Barnaby smiled and stood as Kotetesu did. “It was a pleasure meeting you, Kotetsu-san.” He extended his hand, which Kotetsu took and shook.

            “Same to you, Professor.” Kotetsu replaced his hat, gathered his bag and left the office, carefully shutting the door behind him.

            Outside in the hall, Kotetsu let out a sigh of relief. Professor Barnaby had been all and yet nothing like he expected. His professionalism masked the cocky attitude underneath. Kotetsu suspected the more time they spent together the more that would show through. _I still can’t believe he set aside a time just for me._ And knowing there would be calculus...he would need it.

            Kotetsu pulled out his schedule as he made his way down the stairs. He nearly slipped at the bottom of a flight when he realized his next class was in five minutes...and on the other side of campus! He took the steps two at a time.

 

***

 

            Barnaby watched the door latch closed before he returned to his seat. He opened the calendar on his e-mail client and added a recurring event on Thursdays at two o’clock. He smiled to himself.

            Kotetsu’s nervousness had been kind of endearing. A grown man, almost ten years his senior by the look of him, was nervous about talking to Barnaby. _Just because I’m his professor._ He chuckled slightly as his cellphone buzzed in his pocket. Barnaby flipped the phone open after checking the caller ID.

            “Hello, darling. How’s your day going?”


	2. A Man Needs His Beauty Sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone, thank you so much for all your kind comments ;A; They really mean the world to me and inspire me to continue this fic.
> 
> So without further ado, chapter two!

_Received Wed. Sept. 12 12:06pm_

_**To** : [Barnaby Brooks Jr.] _

_**From** : [Kotetsu T. Kaburagi]_

_**Subject** : Thurs. Tutorial_

_Hi Professor Barnaby,_

_I’m still following the material pretty well so I don’t think I’ll need the tutorial on this week_

_Thanks_

_-Kotetsu_

* * *

 

_**To** : [Kotetsu T. Kaburagi]_

_**From** : [Barnaby Brooks Jr.]_

_**Subject** : RE: Thurs. Tutorial_

_Thanks for letting me know. I will see you in lecture tomorrow._

_Barnaby_

           

            Leaning back in his chair, Barnaby clicked the send button and sighed. He watched how the afternoon light from behind him caught the dust he’d set into motion. It was a good thing Kotetsu cancelled; he’d forgotten about the golf tournament and dinner he was supposed to attend with his boyfriend. Missing another date would not have gone over well. Matt just wouldn’t take ‘I had school-related business’ as an excuse anymore.

            Although, and Barnaby couldn’t explain why, he felt a little sad knowing it would be a full week before he got to talk with Kotetsu again. Maybe he just wanted to see his student’s nervous face. Barnaby smiled at the thought. In any case, it wouldn’t do him any good to dwell on it. Kotetsu was just another student, like any other.

            Barnaby returned to the robotics assignment he’d been working on. He scrutinized the due date he had typed at the top of the document. “Friday September 21st”, it read. That would only leave Kotetsu one night to finish the assignment after their tutorial session. And no doubt more questions would surface as he worked through it. Barnaby highlighted the date and changed it. “Monday September 24th”. He nodded; plenty of time for all his students.

            A sharp knock at the door drew Barnaby’s attention. He called for the person to enter and the door opened.

            “Hey, Handsome!” A dark skinned man with closely shaven pink hair walked in, heels clicking softly on the carpet.

            “Nathan, good to see you. What’s up?”

           “Well,” Nathan leaned forward over the chair in front of Barnaby’s desk. “A bunch of us profs are going out drinking tonight. Want to join us, hm?”

            “On a Wednesday?” Barnaby donned a questioning smile.

            “Not as many students out.” Nathan gestured with a manicured hand. “Though you’d be surprised how many are out anyway!”

            “Thank you for the invitation, but it’s a no from me.” Barnaby saved his work and stood. “I’ve got a couple of things to finish up here and then I need to go home and make dinner.”

            “Hmmmm,” Nathan straightened up. “You making dinner for your boyfriend?”

            “Yes, he’s coming over tonight.” Barnaby grabbed a book from the middle shelf.

            “Ohhhhh~ lucky!” Nathan held his face in both his hands. “I wish I had a nice man to cook dinner for. You’re so lucky, Handsome!”

            “It’s not all fun and games.” Barnaby shrugged and smiled. “Especially when he keeps switching his diet around.”

            “Hmm...vegetarian? Vegan?” Nathan moved in front of the chair and sat down. Barnaby followed suit in his own chair.

            “He started a gluten-free diet recently. Do you know how many products have wheat in them? A lot.”

            Nathan chuckled. “Sounds like you’ve got your hands full. But other than that, you and Matt are good?” Barnaby nodded.

            “It’ll be two years since we’ve been together in November. I’m thinking of asking him to move in with me, actually.”

            “Handsome!” Nathan gasped. “So serious! I hope everything goes well for you two. You’ll have to give me allllll the juicy details!”

            “You always get them out of me somehow.” Barnaby smiled.

            “And rightly so! A girl’s gotta stay on top of her gossip.”

            “That she does.” Barnaby said. “Well, I hope you have fun tonight. I for one, need to finish writing up this assignment.”

            “Oh, alright.” Nathan stood. “But next time, if we go out on a Friday you have to come. Everyone would be thrilled to see you.”

            “I make no promises.” Barnaby lightly shook his head.

            “Suit yourself.” Nathan smiled and opened the office door. “See you around!”

            Barnaby shrugged his shoulders as the door closed. He turned to face his computer screen and opened the robotics textbook he still had in his hand. On the appropriate page, he scoured the questions, jotting down potential candidates with his right hand on the number pad. He would work through the solutions later to gauge the difficulty and skill set necessary for completion. It also came in handy when his students came in for help.

            “I’ll have to pay extra attention to the calculus,” Barnaby mumbled. “Make sure I don’t skip any steps...”

            He paused. Why did he need to pay extra attention? Not just for Kotetsu, surely. Of course not, his other students all had varying math skills as well. Barnaby nodded. He saved his progress and shut down his computer. He packed the textbook he had been working from in his satchel, intending to start on the solutions after his gluten-free dinner date. _I’ll have time as long as Matt doesn’t rope me into another impromptu movie night._

 

 

 

            Barnaby felt terrible _._ The concealer under his eyes only did so much to mask his exhaustion – something he hoped the double espresso latte he was waiting for could alleviate. It had been a while since he’d missed out on so much sleep and his body wasn’t taking it well.

            In addition to sleep deprivation, a different sort of terrible feeling had settled in Barnaby’s stomach: guilt. His students deserved him at his best, not half awake and caffeine fueled. Barnaby hated working like that. He felt his words didn’t have as much of an impact when interspersed with a yawn or a pause to root through sleepy memories of lecture notes. Although Matt never seemed to have any problems working off of four hours of sleep.

            And this was all his fault really. He had once again used his puppy eyes to convince Barnaby to watch several movies Wednesday night, thus leaving him no time to work on the robotics assignment. He had figured that surely Thursday would give him enough time, so he agreed to watch this sci-fi thriller and that documentary. But Thursday did not turn out to be a haven of time.

            The golf tournament had ended at 6 o’clock as planned. The dinner party lasted a little longer than scheduled, but 10 o’clock wasn’t so different from 9:30. But then, of course, one of Matt’s golfing buddies just had to invite them out for drinks. Which Matt had accepted with a quick ‘we’re going’ glance at Barnaby, who had agreed in advance to be the designated driver. Matt never had been very observant of Barnaby’s small head shakes.

            And so, what should have been a normal evening out had turned into a late night pub crawl. Then, after dropping several, rather inebriated golfers off at their homes, including his boyfriend, Barnaby had returned to his apartment to finally finish the assignment. He had barely noticed the current time on his alarm clock when he flopped into bed, but he knew when the alarm went off in the morning that he’d only gotten four or five hours of sleep, tops.

            And now here he was: Friday morning introductory robotics lecture, coffee in one hand, a stack of freshly printed assignments tucked in his satchel. As he set up his computer he willed his fatigue away, hoping he could give this lecture without any hiccups. He took another sip of his latte before taking out the assignment sheets from his bag and starting up the closest aisle. Barnaby prayed the caffeine would hit him soon.

            As he approached the middle of the classroom, stack of paper getting ever lighter, Barnaby noticed Kotetsu sitting at the end of an aisle. He made eye contact a couple of rows away, and gave the man a small nod.

            “Good morning, Kotetsu-san,” Barnaby said, flashing a smile as he handed the older man a stack of assignments. He hoped his voice didn’t sound as strained as he thought it did. His greeting earned him a small smile.

            “Morning, Professor.”

            As he continued with the handouts, Barnaby could feel some energy returning to him. The caffeine had definitely kicked in, and his students’ smiling faces helped to lift his spirits throughout the lecture. He tripped over his words once or twice, but no one seemed to notice. At least, no one called him out on it.

            At the end of the fifty minute lecture, Barnaby felt his energy fading as he took his students’ questions. He answered them to best of his current abilities, slowly thinning out the herd around him. For a moment, Barnaby thought he saw Kotetsu hovering behind the others, but he must have just been walking by, since he didn’t see him again when he looked back.

            Once all of his students had dissipated from around him, Barnaby headed back to the cafe to get another latte – single espresso this time. On his way, he wondered if he could have a quick nap before his afternoon lecture.

 

***

 

            Kotetsu stood outside Professor Barnaby’s office door, hand poised to knock. He held his breath for a second, then sighed and moved his hand back to his side. Why was he here, worrying about this little, probably nothing thing? Sure, Barnaby had looked rather tired during lecture, and sure, that smile he gave may have been an attempt to cover up his tired state. But did that give Kotetsu any rhyme or reason to worry about him?

            Kotetsu almost sighed again, but didn’t just in case the professor could hear him on the other side of the door. He really had no business worrying about him; Barnaby had only ever been professional with him. But with the tutoring sessions they had scheduled, Kotetsu felt a sort of friendship with him, even though they’d only ever spoken the one time. And he couldn’t help but worry about his friends. But what if Barnaby thought that was weird? He probably wasn’t used to students inquiring after his health. Then again, Kotetsu had proven that his inquires weren’t like many others he’d received. But still... _Ah, no, this is silly, I’m just going to go –_

            “Kotetsu-san?”

            Kotetsu froze. He turned slowly towards the sound of the voice and his eyes confirmed what his ears feared.

            “Ah, Professor, hey.” Kotetsu awkwardly waved with his fingers and smiled sheepishly.

            “What brings you here?” Barnaby gestured with his travel mug. “Do you have some questions about today’s material?”

            “Ah, well,” Kotetsu began, moving out of the way as Barnaby approached his office door. “It – is about something from the lecture but...”

            “But...?” Barnaby unlocked the door.

            “ – but it’s not about the lecture itself.” Kotetsu held his breath as Barnaby started to open his office door. He paused.

            “I don’t follow, Kotetsu-san.”

            “Eh...ahhh...” Kotetsu looked around, gaze finally settling on his shoes. He scratched the back of his neck absently. Barnaby sighed.

            “Why don’t you come in?” Kotetsu looked up and found a smile on the professor’s face. “We can talk in my office if you’d like...?”

            Kotetsu shrugged weakly and nodded, following Barnaby into his office. He shut the door behind him and turned to his naturally confused professor. Barnaby glanced expectantly at Kotetsu as he unpacked his things. Kotetsu took a deep breath and decided the best route was to just ask about what was worrying him.

            “Are you feeling okay?”

            “Eh?”

            “Ah, it’s just...” Kotetsu quickly tried to explain himself. “You looked really tired handing out the assignments and...so...” he trailed off, unsure of any other reasons he might have. He studied the wall opposite the bookshelf, waiting for Barnaby’s reaction. When he heard soft laughter, Kotetsu turned to look.

            “I’m surprised you noticed,” a smiling Barnaby said. “I thought I was hiding it pretty well.”

            “Ah well,” Kotetsu absentmindedly touched his ring. “I know a tired smile when I see one.” He couldn’t tell if Barnaby had caught his solemn tone, but from the pause in conversation, it seemed like he did. Kotetsu glanced at him, feeling a little exposed. Barnaby pursed his lips slightly.

            “It’s nothing to worry about, Kotetsu-san.”

            “I wasn’t worried!” Kotetsu exclaimed. He quickly avoided Barnaby’s gaze as he felt his face heat up. Barnaby emitted a little chuckle before continuing.

            “I was up late last night working on the solutions for the assignment I handed out today, that’s all. I am only sleep deprived. Hence the coffee.” He gestured to his travel mug.

            “Ah, well that’s...good?” Kotetsu laughed awkwardly at himself. To think it would be anything more than that would be...jumping to conclusions. Kotetsu shook his head, sighing to himself. “Sorry to bother you, Professor. I don’t have any actual questions, so I’ll be heading out.” He pointed his thumb at the door behind him and turned to leave.

            “Okay. See you on Monday, Kotetsu-san.”

            Kotetsu responded with a quick, “See you,” as he exited the office. He kept his pace normal despite his increasing heart rate. When he reached the stairs, he took them down two at a time. That had gone...a lot better than he had expected it to. It didn’t seem like he’d weirded Barnaby out – on the contrary he seemed rather amused by the whole thing. That was good, right? Kotetsu stopped on the landing between two flights of stairs and looked at his reflection in the window. He smiled. Kotetsu turned and giddily continued down the stairs.

***

_Barnaby gazed out over the edge of the cliff, taking in the scenery as the wind tousled his hair. The setting sun cast a warm glow on the surrounding hills covered in parts with field and parts with forest. It also told of approaching night, and Barnaby knew he and his partner needed to start heading back down to the village so as not to be caught in the dark. But it was proving difficult to tear his eyes away from the gorgeous view outlined before him._

_Barnaby felt a hand thread its fingers through his, and he gave it a little squeeze to acknowledge the hand’s owner. They stood in silence for a time, listening to the wind and birds whistle as they crossed the sky. His partner spoke to him in an unusual voice, and Barnaby finally turned to look at his face. But it wasn’t Matt, as Barnaby had assumed._

_It was Kotetsu._

 

            Barnaby slowly opened his eyes to the blurry sight of his desk. He turned his head to look where he knew his empty travel mug was and glared at it accusingly. As he straightened and stretched out his muscles, Barnaby muttered:

            “That is the last time I have caffeine before taking a nap.”


	3. May the Learning Commence!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos! I hope you lovely readers enjoy this chapter :)

            Kotetsu entered the lecture hall Monday morning feeling pretty confident. Over the weekend, he had started working on the robotics assignment and he’d been able to finish two questions! At least, he was pretty sure he had the right answers. He supposed he’d know for sure this Thursday during his tutoring session with Professor Barnaby.

            Making his way to his usual seat, on the aisle in the middle section, Kotetsu wondered if he should move closer to the front. His seat didn’t offer a good view of the professor’s expression but moving now would probably upset the seating arrangements. He watched as the front section filled up and lamented that he wouldn’t see Barnaby’s smile today. He shook his head.

            _Oh well,_ he thought, _on Thursday I’ll get to see him in person anyways._ Kotetsu smiled and felt a giddy feeling well up inside him. Strange how the thought of having a one-on-one session with Barnaby seemed to make him this happy. Barnaby’s smile was infectious even when Kotetsu couldn’t see it, apparently.

            As he unpacked his things, Kotetsu saw movement at the front of the room. Soon the faint blue light from the warming-up projector spread across his notebook and pencils as Barnaby made quick work of the setup. Kotetsu watched silently as Barnaby plugged this cable and that wire into his laptop, never looking up from his task. He retrieved some papers from his satchel and arranged them on the desk in front of him. When the slideshow appeared on the screens, Barnaby pulled a remote out of his pocket and tested it. Seeing the slide change, he gave a satisfied nod and turned to face the seating area.

            Kotetsu tensed a little, hoping the professor hadn’t caught him staring. Why he thought the professor might be looking for him at all, he didn’t know. His smile returned easily however, and when he was sure Barnaby was looking his way, Kotetsu gave the tiniest of waves as a way of silent greeting. And received a small nod in return.

            His heart nearly skipped a beat.

            Kotetsu glanced around after Barnaby had turned to arrange his notes some more, looking for anyone else who might have been the intended recipient of the gesture. Several people were turned to their sides, chatting with friends or just looking disinterested. Several more were reading books, looking at laptops or resting their heads on the desk in front of them. Absolutely no one was looking at the front...until a gentle voice filled the speakers.

            “Good morning, everyone.”

            Seeing everyone’s heads turn, Kotetsu also focused his attention to the front of the room. Knowing that nod had been for him alone, he felt his face grow warm. He swallowed and willed the flustered heat to go away. _C’mon Kotetsu, no need to get excited. Your professor just acknowledged you specifically in a room full of hundreds of people. No biggie!_ Luckily, it proved simple to focus; Barnaby’s engaging lecturing voice had drawn him in again.

            But every time the professor drew a conclusion, his enthusiasm resonated with Kotetsu and that feeling of giddiness washed over him again. He found himself getting lost in the pleasant tones flowing out of the speakers, leaving little capacity for his note taking. Throughout the lecture he had to hastily scribble down what he remembered before Barnaby moved on to the next topic.

 

            Wednesday’s lecture passed much like Monday’s – a wave, a nod, an inexplicable giddiness. Kotetsu’s notes, similarly scribbled. At least deciphering them afterwards and writing them out neatly proved to be a useful studying tool. However, some of the integrals on the assignment still eluded him – but not for long.

            Thursday arrived and after attending his almost two hour psychology lecture at noon, Kotetsu made his way to the Robotics wing of the Engineering building on campus. He opted to take the stairs up to Barnaby’s office, not wanting to be too early to his two o’clock appointment. Kotetsu paused at the top of the flight to catch his breath, an all-too-familiar feeling beginning to spread through him. Learning from someone passionate had always gotten Kotetsu fired up but it had never been this strong before. The energy Barnaby brought was amazing and Kotetsu counted his lucky stars he could learn from such a man. He took a deep breath in and knocked twice on Barnaby’s office door.

            “Come in,” the professor’s voice beckoned from inside. Kotetsu opened the door and was greeted by Barnaby’s smiling face. “Good afternoon, Kotetsu-san.”

            “Good afternoon, Professor!” Kotetsu placed his bag in the chair to his left. “How are you today?”

            “I’m doing well, thank you. Yourself?” Barnaby gestured to the other seat.

            “I’m good, thanks.” Kotetsu took the offered seat. “Ready to kick this calculus in the butt!”

            Barnaby chuckled. “Well, then I guess we’ll get right to it then! Do you have any specific questions, or shall I give you a short recap of the material?”

            “Ah, I’ve got questions, I guess.” Kotetsu opened his bag and pulled out his assignment draft. “I’ve been working on the assignment and, I think I have the first couple of questions right. The rest I know need a little more work so...”

            “May I see?” Barnaby asked, extending his hand. Kotetsu nodded and handed him the loose sheets. He watched as the professor’s eyes flitted over the paper, studying the arrangements of variables written there. Kotetsu gently wiped his palms on his pants, waiting for some sort of reaction. Barnaby flipped the page, nodding slowly as he continued to read.

            Kotetsu felt his heart rate slowly accelerate as the studious silence continued. Barnaby was still nodding, so that was a good thing right? When the professor finally looked up, Kotetsu had to remind himself to breathe.

            “You’re definitely on the right track with these answers.” Barnaby said, placing the papers on the desk. “This shows me you have a good understanding of the course material.” He smiled, and Kotetsu beamed back, nodding for him to continue. “You’ve set up these questions here correctly but – ”

            “But I need help with the calculus.” Kotetsu offered. Barnaby nodded.

            “Though once I’ve shown you a few techniques, it should become clearer.”          

            “Alright,” Kotetsu readied his pencil, “Impart upon me your wisdom, Professor Barnaby!”

            “Okay,” Barnaby laughed. He gestured with his own pencil to Kotetsu’s solutions. “Here in question two – ”

            “Aw, I thought I had that one!”

            “In a way, you do. But you can simplify your answer by using a trigonometric identity.” Barnaby wrote an equation down on a fresh piece of paper. “Can you use this to make your answer neater?”

            “Uh, let’s see,” Kotetsu leaned over the desk a little to get a better look. “Oh, yeah I think so!” In his excitement to write the solution, he knocked his right hand on the desk, causing his pencil to slip from his fingers. It clattered onto the floor. “Whoops! One sec.” Shifting back to get a better angle, Kotetsu accidentally kicked the pencil under Barnaby’s desk. He made a disgruntled noise and Barnaby suppressed a laugh.

            “Here, use mine.”

            Kotetsu sighed. “Thanks,” He took the pencil, fingers brushing lightly over Barnaby’s. A small warmth spread from the contact and Kotetsu swore if fingers could blush, his would be. _No need to get so excited_ , he berated. He continued the solution on his paper as Barnaby bent down to pick up the dropped pencil. When Kotetsu was done he looked up to find the professor nodding appreciatively.

            “Exactly. Good work, Kotetsu-san.”

            “Uh, thanks, but – ”

            “No buts.” Barnaby said firmly. “I merely gave you a tool that most, if not all, of your classmates has already. You were the one who figured out how to use it.”

            “Ah...thanks...” Kotetsu laughed nervously and turned his face away. He absentmindedly scratched at his sideburn, feeling his face heat up a little from such honest praise. He cleared his throat to focus his thoughts and turned back to look at the next question.

            “So, is there a trigo-no-whatsit identity I can use here to make this integral nicer?”

            “Trigonometric.” Barnaby offered. “And yes, but I won’t just give you the right one this time.” He used Kotetsu’s pencil to write a few more equations below the first. He placed the pencil underneath the writing and turned the paper to Kotetsu. “Why don’t you try and figure it out?”

            Kotetsu switched pencils, leaving Barnaby’s on the table. He glanced at his professor’s face before setting to work. The hint of a challenging smirk beneath his smile filled Kotetsu with determination.

            As he began to examine the identities Barnaby had written out for him, the desk vibrated a little. A small chime soon accompanied the movement, sounding from inside one of the drawers.

            “Ah, sorry about that,” Barnaby made to retrieve his phone, “I must’ve forgotten to put it on silent.”

            “That’s oka – ” Another chime interrupted Kotetsu. “Wow, you sure are popular!” He grinned. Barnaby opened his mouth to protest but his cell chimed again in his hand. Instead he sighed and flipped open his phone.

            “I’ve told Matt one text will suffice but...” Barnaby held a button down until his phone vibrated once. He flipped it closed and placed it back in the drawer. Where it only vibrated again. Barnaby closed his eyes and let out an exasperated sigh.

            “Professor, why don’t you answer that while I work on this?” Kotetsu suggested. “It’ll probably take me awhile.”

            “Ah, but –” Another vibration.

            “No buts, just answer it.” Kotetsu smiled and went back to his work.

            “Thank you, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby retrieved his phone again. It vibrated again. “This better be important...” he grumbled.

            Kotetsu laughed a little, listening to the button tapping sounds as Barnaby typed out a reply. His curiosity made it difficult to focus, but he pushed past it. He didn’t need to know who Matt was or what he texted about. For a time, the scratch of the pencil and the pressing of keys were the only sounds in the office. A comfortable almost-silence.

            Finishing the question, Kotetsu marked the last line decisively on the page.

            “Done!” He looked up to find Barnaby had already put away his phone.

            “Okay, let’s see.” Barnaby took the page Kotetsu offered him and looked it over. He nodded before handing it back. “Looks good. I think you’ve got the hang of this now.”

            Kotetsu nodded. He waited a few moments, but when Barnaby hadn’t said anything he spoke. “Is – ” Kotetsu blinked. “Is that all?”

            “For this assignment, yes. Since we’re only dealing with this one aspect right now, this should be all you need to finish up.”

            “Oh.” Kotetsu had thought this tutorial would be a bit longer. Barnaby must’ve noticed the slight slump in his shoulders, because he added:

            “Unless you have some other questions?”

            “Uh, let me just look over the rest of the assignment.”

            “Of course.” Barnaby’s phone vibrated from the drawer again. He took it out while Kotetsu looked over the remaining questions he had been stuck on. Knowing the trigonometric identities, he could see how one might simplify the expressions he had to more manageable equations. He could indeed figure these out.

            Kotetsu sighed inwardly. On the one hand, he was glad he understood the material and that the math roadblocks were being lifted. But on the other hand, he wanted to spend more time with Barnaby. Even though he didn’t need to know, he wanted to know more about him. What were his favourite foods? TV shows? Colours? Did he have any hobbies? How long does it take him to do his hair in the morning? Kotetsu wanted to ask him all of this and more.

            “Kotetsu-san?”

            Kotetsu looked up quickly, realizing he must’ve been spacing out. Barnaby had his phone in hand again and, his curiosity heightened, Kotetsu decided to pry.

            “Matt again?” he said, gesturing with his chin to the phone.

            “Ah, yeah.” Barnaby smiled. “He’s trying to convince me it’s my turn to make dinner when it’s clearly his.” He shook his head, curls bouncing around his face. “Since I’m not too busy today though, I might indulge him.”

            “And then he owes you a dinner, right?” Kotetsu suggested. Barnaby laughed.

            “If I tell him that, he’ll start convincing me it _is_ his turn.”

            “Problem solved!” Kotetsu grinned, enjoying the moment as Barnaby typed up a reply on his phone.

            “If this works, I might owe _you_ one, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby said, looking up from his phone.

            “No, no,” Kotetsu waved his hand dismissively. “You don’t owe me anything. You’re helping me with this math stuff, if anything – ”

            “No, you don’t owe me either.” Barnaby interrupted. “I’m always happy to help.”

            Kotetsu wasn’t sure how to follow that up, but luckily Barnaby’s phone received a message right at that moment. He flipped it open and laughed, shaking his head.

            “Guess who’s making dinner tonight?”

            “Not you?” Barnaby nodded and the two of them had a good laugh.

            “So, what are you having?” Kotetsu asked, still laughing a little bit. Barnaby shrugged.

            “He said he’d surprise me. Knowing him, it’s either grilled salmon or something he’s never made before.”

            “Does he like grilled salmon that much?”

            Barnaby smiled wistfully and looked over to a small picture frame on his desk.

            “It’s my favourite, actually.” He leaned over and picked up the frame. Then he put it back down. “Ah, but this is no time to be sentimental – ”

            “Hey, we’re done with the school stuff, right?” Kotetsu interjected. This was his chance! “Perfect time to be sentimental.” He nodded at the picture frame. Barnaby looked like he was going to protest, but he grabbed the frame anyway, offering it to Kotetsu.

            It was a small silver, rectangular thing, with small gold hearts in each of the corners. The picture inside captured a smiling Barnaby and someone who Kotetsu assumed was Matt. They were in front of a large Christmas tree whose top wasn’t visible. Judging from the hats and scarves they were bundled up in, it had been a cold day.

            “We met a couple years ago in September through a mutual friend’s birthday party. We got together for coffee a few times afterwards and started dating a couple months later.” Barnaby paused, a light blush colouring his face.

            “You two look good together,” Kotetsu said, handing back the picture frame. Barnaby returned it to its place on the desk.

            “Thanks; it’s been a bit of a roller coaster but I think we make each other happy.”

            “Well that’s good.” Kotetsu sat back in his chair. “Relationships are never easy, but at the end of the day I think they should be a positive influence on your life.” Barnaby chuckled softly. “What?”

            “It’s nothing, just... I just know you’ll make a great counsellor. You have good advice.”

            “Ahhh,” Kotetsu rubbed the back of his neck. “You flatter me too much, Professor.”

            “I’m just being honest.” Barnaby smiled. _That’s the problem!_ Kotetsu awkwardly looked around the room before settling his gaze on his notes on the desk. He gathered them up and started to pack them in his bag.

            “Well, thank you for today, Professor Barnaby.” Kotetsu stood up, slinging his bag over his shoulder.

            “No problem, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby stood up also. “If you have any questions over the weekend, please don’t hesitate to send me an e-mail.”

            “Alright. Thanks again,” Kotetsu moved towards the door.

            “I’ll see you in lecture tomorrow?” Barnaby asked.

            “Mmhmm. See you, Professor.” Kotetsu waved as he opened the door and Barnaby returned it. Exiting into the hallway, he closed the door behind him.

            Kotetsu made his way to the stairs, happiness welling up inside him once again. Things were going great! His assignment was nearly done, he had chatted with Barnaby and found out what his favourite food was. Kotetsu had an urge to look up recipes for grilled salmon, but when would he ever be cooking for him? Kotetsu shook his head and continued down the stairs. He didn’t even have a barbeque anyway!

***

 

            Barnaby sank back down into his chair after Kotetsu had left. He had never opened up like that to one of his students, let alone someone he was personally tutoring. It just seemed so easy to talk to Kotetsu that the words just came out. Barnaby wasn’t complaining of course, but he hoped it wouldn’t come back to bite him.

            He rested his chin on his hand and gazed at the small picture frame with the hearts. _I won’t get bitten_ , he thought. _Kotetsu-san isn’t that kind of person._ He smiled to himself, marvelling at the new experience. If things continued like this, he hoped they’d stay in touch after these four months were over. Barnaby would love to have Kotetsu as a friend.

            The memory of his caffeine-induced dream came unbidden into his thoughts. He rubbed his forehead, cursing his emotions for toying with him like this. Kotetsu was a friend – any sort of more-than-friends relationship his subconscious desired was impossible. Firstly, he was already dating Matt and they were fine together. Secondly, Kotetsu was his student. A good looking, older one, but a student nonetheless. Dating a student is the first taboo you learn about as a professor. It might seem feasible at first – especially for a younger professor – but it can lead to all sorts of nasty implications and accusations. Things Barnaby would rather avoid.

            His thought process was interrupted by the buzzing of his cell. Barnaby flipped his phone open and was not surprised to see Matt’s name beside the new message alert. He smiled and pressed the button to open the message:

 

_Hey, can you pick up some salmon on your way home?_

 

            Predictable. 


	4. What Dreams Are Made Of

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year everyone! orz My apologies for the extreme lateness of this chapter, I'll hopefully have two (that's right two!) more chapters by the end of the month. 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! Enjoy :D

            Barnaby clutched at his satchel as he raced across campus, clusters of students parting before him. Where he could, he expressed a quick thanks but Barnaby had no time to waste.

            He was late for class.

            Some kind students held the lecture building doors open and Barnaby gave thanks as he zigzagged through the outbound flow of traffic. Throwing open the door to the lecture hall, he checked his watch. Three minutes past ten thirty. Barnaby silently cursed as he fast-walked to the front of the room. He quickly got the microphone working and addressed his students.

            “Good morning, everyone. So sorry I’m late!” Barnaby connected the projector wires to his laptop. “An accident happened just in front of me on the highway and there was no way around it for a while.” Everything set-up, Barnaby took a deep breath and exhaled. “I hope no one minds I wasted three minutes of their life.”

            A collective laugh sounded through the lecture hall; Barnaby smiled. Making a few last adjustments, Barnaby caught his breath. His heart rate was finally starting to go down from his unexpected cardio.

            A small motion from the middle section of the seating caught his eye. Barnaby focused and saw Kotetsu, waving his hand lightly. Barnaby couldn’t help but smile and nod in acknowledgement; a gesture that was quickly becoming routine. He found the wordless exchange rather cute, actually. And it was something he imagined Kotetsu appreciated.

            _I really like it too,_ Barnaby thought, just before diving into the lecture.

 

            “Don’t forget to hand in your assignments!” Barnaby called over the microphone before turning it off. He began to pack up his things as students filed down from their seats and placed their assignments on the ever growing stack at the front of the room.

            A loud slap of paper on paper drew Barnaby’s attention. He looked up to see Kotetsu standing triumphantly over the stack of assignments, his hand on the top of the pile.

            “Here you go, Professor!”

            Barnaby tried to stifle his laughter with the back of his hand, but this was too ridiculous.

            “Thank you, Kotetsu-san,” he responded, still laughing a little. Kotetsu nodded, flashed a smile then swiftly turned around and walked away. Barnaby thought he heard a little triumphant huff from the older man, but he couldn’t be certain. Kotetsu’s confident smile had his heart beating loudly in his ears at a thousand miles a minute.

            And in addition, as if that wasn’t enough, Barnaby could faintly smell Kotetsu’s cologne. Cinnamon spice with a hint of something more earthy. A scent he recognized from their tutorial sessions.

            He shook his head and finished gathering up everything but the assignment stack. As the last few students trickled down from the upper levels, Barnaby reflected to himself. _Yes, Kotetsu-san does smell nice. And yes, he might look really handsome in that vest and tie he seems to always be wearing but it’s nothing to get excited about. He’s your student._

            Barnaby sighed and opened up a separate section of his satchel to stow the assignments. He really needed to stop having this conversation with himself. The more he thought about it, the more he’d think about it, thus the more his imagination would run away from him. And while this was useful when he was working on his research, it was definitely not helping presently. A healthy imagination could be a curse as well as a gift, he supposed. Barnaby sighed once more before leaving, wondering if maybe he should talk to Nathan about all this.

 

            Thursday came again, and having handed out a new assignment the day before, Barnaby expected the barrage of questions Kotetsu had.

            “I’m having a lot of trouble with these last three questions here,” Kotetsu said, pointing them out on the assignment sheet.

            “Ah, don’t worry about those until next week.” Barnaby waved his hand.

            “Why not?”

            “We haven’t covered the material in lecture yet.” He smirked.

            “...so that’s why they made no sense.” Kotetsu muttered into his hand. “Okay, so what about this first question here?” Barnaby looked at the preliminary solution Kotetsu was pointing at.

            “Try applying a different concept.” Barnaby offered. “As you found out, you’re missing some information using that method.”

            Kotetsu stared at the page, chin resting on his hand. Barnaby pursed his lips, quieting a laugh that built up in his chest. The intense concentration radiating off Kotetsu was quite endearing. The fact that he was putting his all into Barnaby’s class made him well up with pride. Barnaby imagined it might be a similar feeling to what a parent would feel for their child. Except this child was probably twice his age and Barnaby definitely did not think of him like a son.

            “Aaaah,” Kotetsu grumbled, putting his papers down and mussing his hair.

            “Need a hint?” Barnaby asked, allowing a teasing smile to play across his face. Kotetsu exhaled sharply before reaching for his notes.

            “No,” Kotetsu defended, flipping through his hand written notes. “I just need a little refresher.”

            “Okay,” Barnaby said, leaning back in his chair. Kotetsu’s intense concentration returned, but Barnaby found himself staring at his student’s now out-of-place hair. He wanted to straighten it out, run his fingers through it, maybe even twirl it playfully around his finger... Barnaby breathed out slowly, letting that thought out with the carbon dioxide. _No casual touching, imagination,_ he chided. _That is a gateway thought._

            Kotetsu made an exclamatory noise, pulling Barnaby back to reality. Pencil met paper as Kotetsu scribbled down some new equation after reviewing his notes. Barnaby took the paper when it was offered to him.

            “How’s that now?” Kotetsu asked.

            “Now you’ve got it.” Barnaby said, nodding.

            “And let me guess,” Kotetsu took his paper back, “the other questions I’m stuck on start like that too?”

            “Why don’t you apply it and find out?”

            “I will, but,” Kotetsu glanced at his watch, “I’ll have to do it later. I’ve got an appointment with my chiropractor that I scheduled months ago.”

            “Of course,” Barnaby said quickly while Kotetsu started to gather his notes. “Why didn’t you say something earlier? We could have rescheduled.”

           “Nah, I didn’t want to trouble you.” Kotetsu answered, shaking his head. “Besides, I figured I’d have next week and e-mails if I didn’t get to ask all my questions.” He smiled. Barnaby returned the expression.

            “I suppose. I hope your appointment goes well, Kotetsu-san.”

            “I should be fine.” Kotetsu waved dismissively, glancing over the desk to make sure his things were all packed. “He says I’m almost back to normal, though I should still take it easy. Avoid over-exerting myself and all that jazz.” Kotetsu shouldered his bag and walked over to the door. “See you tomorrow, Professor,” he faux-saluted as he left the room.

            “See you!” Barnaby waved at Kotetsu’s retreating figure, the door closing behind him. Barnaby sighed and woke his computer to continue working on something when the door to his office opened up.

            “Who was that hot piece of ass?”

            Barnaby groaned. “Nathan –”

            “Tell me you have his phone number.”

            “Nathan.” Barnaby fixed him with an icy stare, giving him pause. “That was one of my students. I hardly think it’s appropriate to talk about him like that.” Nathan blinked a couple of times, doing a double take at the closed door behind him.

            “That was one of your students? But he’s –”

            “Older than me?” Nathan nodded. Barnaby continued: “He hurt his back working as a firefighter so he needed to change careers. He’s currently working towards his qualifications to become a grief counsellor.”

            “Sorry handsome, you lost me at firefighter.” Nathan stared wistfully at the ceiling. Barnaby swallowed, trying to suppress his own imagination and failing miserably.

            “Can we not objectify my student, please?”

            “I’m not objectifying,” Nathan said, sitting down in the chair to his left. “I’m simply appreciating aesthetic.” Barnaby rolled his eyes. “C’mon now, Barnaby-kun, you can at least do that much.”

            Barnaby’s reply was mumbled into his palm. “I do.”

            “Hmm?” Nathan leaned forward, intrigued. “What was that, Handsome?”

            Barnaby sighed, knowing this conversation was inevitable. “I do, as you say, ‘appreciate his aesthetic’. But it’s becoming a problem.”

            “Ohoho,” Nathan leaned back, resting a manicured hand on his chin. “Do tell.”

            Barnaby also leaned back, trying to avoid meeting Nathan’s twinkling gaze. Where would he even start? It wasn’t even October yet, and he felt like they’d spent so much time together already. Barnaby wouldn’t say he knew everything about Kotetsu; on the contrary, he’d just scratched the surface. But just thinking about Kotetsu’s smiling face when he got a question right – the way his face lit up and his eyes almost sparkled – was enough to warm Barnaby’s heart.

            “Handsome, you’re all flushed.” Nathan teased.

            Barnaby inhaled sharply, looking anywhere but Nathan’s all-knowing face. He could feel the heat on his cheeks now, a dull burn threatening to spread all the way to his ears. These feelings were not something he had expected when Kotetsu had first shown up at his office door. But it was no use denying them now, not when they were so apparent and definitely not just subconscious thoughts anymore. Barnaby took a deep breath, steeling himself for the reality of the words that were about to spill from his lips.

            “Nathan, I think I have a crush on him.”

            Clasping his hands together, Nathan giggled. A sly smile played on his face and Barnaby could tell he would never hear the end of it.

            “How scandalous, Barnaby-kun!” Nathan said, more dramatically than Barnaby thought possible. “A professor pining after a student older than himself!” He gasped, smile still teasing. “What would Matt think?”

            Barnaby made a noise he could only describe as ‘suffering’ and slumped in his chair. He really didn’t want to have these feelings, but here they were. He couldn’t say he hated them either, since he really did like Kotetsu as a person, but the tumultuous knots in his stomach that came with them were not the most comfortable. He hadn’t even thought about telling Matt about them.

            “Oh dear,” Nathan continued, all teasing gone from his face. “You’ve got it bad, don’t you?”

            Barnaby sat up, not wanting to seem like a whining child who couldn’t choose which toy to play with. “I think I’m making it out worse than it is. It’s just – I find him so easy to talk to. I don’t know if it’s because he’s older or something else but I feel like I can trust him. Not to mention his smile is so infectious and genuine. I can’t help but smile just thinking about it!” As if to prove his point, Barnaby smiled. “And he waves to me from his seat at the beginning of every class – it’s so cute.” He paused, slowly lowering his head into his hands, only now feeling the enormity of what he said.

            Nathan had sat quietly, listening to every word. After a few moments of silence, Barnaby looked up at him to find him deep in thought. His hand rested on his chin, eyes closed. Another few moments passed and Nathan began to slowly shake his head.

            “What?” Barnaby asked.

            “There’s not much I can suggest to you. I’m assuming since he’s one of your students you can’t just avoid him?”

            “No,” Barnaby let out an exasperated breath. “He comes in every Thursday for a one-on-one tutorial session.” Barnaby sat forward in his chair. “And it’s not like I want to avoid him – I’d rather not lose his friendship.”

            “Hmmm...” Nathan considered this. “Well then, Barnaby-kun here’s my advice: Acknowledge your feelings but move on. It’s obvious they can’t lead to anywhere good at this point in time, and as of now, that’s all they are. Feelings. You don’t have to act upon them.” Barnaby nodded slowly. “Another thing I can suggest to take your mind off of him: make plans with Matt. Looking forward to something with your bf is bound to place your affections in a better spot.”

            Nathan smiled, a caring motherly smile, and Barnaby suddenly felt really silly for letting this bother him so much. He had feelings yes, but he had the power to move past them; he needn’t act on them. He smiled.

            “Thanks, Nathan. I needed that.”

            “It’s your first time crushing on a student, hm?” He laughed. “I remember the first time it happened to me – it was a rather confusing time. But I learned it happens to everyone eventually.” He smiled caringly again. “Just remember it’s not the end of the world.”

            “I will. Thanks.” Barnaby smiled again. After a few moments of companionable silence, Barnaby spoke:          

            “So, why were you over here in the first place? Surely not just to gawk at my students?”

            “Hm? Oh, right!” Nathan waved his hand. “I was going to invite you out drinking again.”

            “Tonight?”

            “Tomorrow, actually. My usual group is heading out of town to a friend’s place. Matt’s invited too.” Nathan winked deviously.

            Barnaby rolled his eyes and laughed. “I can’t promise anything, but I’ll propose the idea.”

            “Oohh~ propose! There’s an idea!” Barnaby flushed, and Nathan laughed, waving a dismissing hand. “I kid, I kid. You’re too fun to tease, Handsome! But do come see me tomorrow to let me know if you two are coming. Mr. I-can’t-make-any-promises.”

            Barnaby sighed contently. “Of course.”

            “Good.” Nathan stood up. “I’ll mark you two down as maybes.” Smoothing out his jacket he walked to the door. “Remember Handsome, don’t fret too much about your little crush. After all, you haven’t started dreaming about him!” Nathan closed the door with a wave.

            Barnaby stared blankly at the closed door, mind running circles, flush spreading to his ears. He had managed to put that caffeine-induced dream behind a figurative brick wall, but Nathan had just taken a figurative sledge hammer to it. The memories all came flooding back: the serene scenery, the feeling of their intertwined fingers, the sense of comfort. Nathan, who offered his advice to avoid this kind of moment, had been the one to trigger it.

            Barnaby put his head in his hands, fingers lacing through his hair. He let out a single laugh, reveling in the irony of it all and trying not to come apart at the seams. Did he really care for Kotetsu that much?

            “Shit.” He muttered before digging out his cell phone and quickly locating Matt’s number. As he listened to it ring, Barnaby prayed his boyfriend was free this weekend.


	5. How to Care for Your Rabbit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Without further ado, Chapter 5!

 

            Kotetsu pulled into the driveway of his childhood home just as his brother and daughter were coming down the front steps. He quickly put his car in park and stepped out.

            “Kaede, I’m home!”

            “Dad!” Kaede bounded down the steps into Kotetsu’s outstretched arms. “Welcome home, Dad!” She squeezed him tightly then pulled back, eyes bright with excitement. “I’m so glad you’re here this weekend!”

            “I’m happy to be here too!” Kotetsu laughed and pulled Kaede back in for another hug.

            “Now, Dad, you do remember what we’re doing tonight, right?”

            “Um, of course I do, sweetie! We’re uh...” Kotetsu wracked his brain for even the slightest inkling of an idea.

            “Don’t tell me you forgot, Dad.” Kaede huffed.

            “I didn’t, I uh...just can’t quite –” Kotetsu snapped his fingers. “Rabbits! We’re taking care of the school rabbits, tonight, right?”

            “Yes!” Kaede’s face brightened.

            “How silly of your papa to almost forget!” Kotetsu ruffled Kaede’s hair a little. “I’m glad we can do this together.”

            “Me too!” Kaede smiled and ran off towards her uncle’s van. Kotetsu stood up and watched her clamber into the passenger’s seat.

            “We were just going to the grocery store to pick up some things for dinner.” Muramasa spoke up. “What to come with?”

            “Nah, you two go ahead.” Kotetsu answered. “I’m gonna unpack my stuff and say hi to Ma.”

            “Alright, we’ll be back soon.” Muramusa shrugged. He started to walk over towards the van, but Kotetsu put a hand on his shoulder.

            “Hey, thanks for taking care of her while I’m away.”

            Muramasa smiled. “You should really be thanking Mom more than me, little brother.”

            “You deserve as much thanks as her.” Kotetsu shrugged. His brother just shook his head a little and continued heading towards his van. Kotetsu called after him: “What’s for dinner anyway?”

            “Beef hot pot.”

            “Sweet!”

            Kotetsu returned to his car as his brother and daughter left for the supermarket. He grabbed his luggage and headed up the front steps. Upon reaching the front door, it opened.

            “Welcome home, Kotetsu,” Anju greeted him. “I was wondering what all the commotion was about out here.”

            “Hi Mom, good to be home!” Kotetsu placed his luggage down and pulled his mother into a hug. “Anything I can help you with while I’m here?”

            Anju stepped back. “Aren’t you supposed to be resting your back or something?”

            “I could say the same to you, Ma.” Kotetsu teased.

            “Very funny.” Anju stepped back from the door, allowing Kotetsu to enter. He exchanged his shoes for a pair of slippers as he brought himself and his luggage inside.

            “Though since you so kindly offered,” Anju continued, “you can do the dishes after supper. How does that sound?”

            “Sure thing, Ma.” Kotetsu laughed. Anju headed for the kitchen, cutting their conversation off. Kotetsu headed for the guest room.

            After depositing his luggage, Kotetsu walked to the back porch and stepped outside. The crisp autumn air filled his nostrils with the earthy scent of decaying leaves. He inhaled deeply, waves of nostalgia washing over him. Being here always filled him with a sense of calm and clarity that he just couldn’t get in the city. Kotetsu sighed with contentment.

            A new smell wafted over and brought Kotetsu back to reality – incense. He blinked and glanced at the open window to his left. He smiled fondly. _There’s someone I forgot to greet._ He went back inside.

            Kotetsu found the sticks of incense alight at the shrine. Their low glow reflected off the framed photo on the wooden surface behind them.

            “Hello, Tomoe.” Kotetsu said, smiling and fiddling with his wedding ring. Tomoe smiled back at him from the picture frame, as she always did. Kotetsu knelt down in front of the shrine and continued.

            “Sorry I haven’t been home in a while. School’s been keeping me pretty busy.” He paused. “You’ll be surprised to hear I’m doing calculus in one of my classes! I know, right? Math is definitely not one of my strengths. But it’s okay, I have a great tutor! The professor himself is helping me, how about that?” Kotetsu chuckled. “You know, I think you’d like him. If you saw him on the street you’d probably point him out to me. ‘Oh, look at him! So handsome, like a model!’ ”

            “Is he that good looking?”

            Kotetsu started, whirling around to see his mother standing in the doorway behind him, holding a vegetable peeler.

            “Ma, it’s not nice to eavesdrop!” he admonished.

            Anju huffed a smile. “Well, eavesdropping is the only way I hear about some things!” She chuckled as Kotetsu pouted. “Well, out with it! Is he really that good looking?”

            Kotetsu flinched and turned back to the shrine. He pictured Barnaby with his perfectly coiffed hair and nice suit jacket. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t blush. “Yeah, I’d say he’s conventionally attractive.”

            “Boring.”

            “Ah –” Kotetsu looked back to retort but his mother was already gone. He adjusted his position so he was sitting on the floor now, one arm draped over his upright bent leg. “How is that boring?” He glanced up at Tomoe’s photo. _Did she mean it’s boring I don’t find him more attractive?_ Kotetsu pondered this for a few moments. It was no secret to himself that he thought Barnaby was good looking. He figured most everyone probably thought the same. Although, after spending more time with him, Kotetsu had begun to notice some things he hadn’t before. Things that made his heart do little, involutary back flips. The way his green eyes sparkled behind his glasses sometimes; how his gold necklace hung out from his neck while he leaned over to point something out on the assignment. And sometimes he got this smug look on his face –

            “Kotetsu, stop moping over there and come help me with dinner!” Anju called from the kitchen. Derailed from his train of thought, Kotetsu called back:

            “I wasn’t moping, Ma, I was thinking!” He continued, muttering. “And I thought you didn’t need my help.”

            “I changed my mind!”

            Kotetsu shuddered. _Ears like a cat._ He stood up, giving one last look to Tomoe’s photo.

            “Talk to you later, Tomoe.”

 

            “Dad, c’mon, let’s go!” Kaede tugged on Kotetsu’s sleeve as he finished his dinner.

            “Ah buh Kae – ” He swallowed. “But Kaede, I said I’d help with the –”

            “The dishes will still be here when we get back!” She tugged again. “C’mon we have to go before sunset!”

            “Alright, alright,” Kotetsu gathered up what dishes he could carry and placed them by the sink. “Ma, I promised Kaede I’d help her with the school rabbits. And I’m promising you now that I’ll do the dishes when we get back.”

            “I’ll believe it when I see it.”Anju teased. “You two have fun!”

            Kaede practically dragged Kotetsu to the front door. “You’re gonna love the bunnies, Dad! They’re so cute!” Kaede quickly tied her shoelaces and Kotetsu couldn’t help but smile at her enthusiasm.

            “These bunnies better be the cutest things I’ve ever seen!” Kotetsu said. Kaede giggled.

            “They will be!” She opened the door and took off down the stairs.

            “Wait for me, Kaede!” Kotetsu called after her, tapping his shoes into place. Soon, they were seated, buckled and on their way.

            The drive took only five minutes, but Kaede had filled the time so full of rabbit facts Kotetsu felt like he’d watched an entire documentary. He parked and Kaede hopped out of the car, pointing toward the side of the school.

            “We keep the rabbits in a fenced area over there!” She explained.

            “Lead the way!”

            Kaede bounded ahead and Kotetsu followed at a medium pace. He arrived at the gate just as Kaede finished opening the combination lock. Kotetsu observed the area, looking for the small, fluffy creatures but only saw what looked like two sheds.

            “So where are they?” He asked.

            “They’re probably inside their hutch.” Kaede pointed to the shed on the left. “They might come out now that they know we’re here.” She knelt down and turned over a rock, pulling out a key. Unlocking the shed on the right, Kaede motioned for Kotetsu to follow.

            “This is where we keep their food and other supplies.” She gestured at the low shelf that lined both sides of the shed. The surfaces were filled with plastic containers, each labeled with their contents: brushes, hay, wood shavings, etc. A small fridge occupied the corner and Kaede opened it and grabbed several carrots, some lettuce and some strawberries. Kotetsu also saw some celery and sprouts of some kind before she shut the door.

            “That’s a lot of produce in there.” He remarked.

            “We like to give them some variety!” She smiled. “Dad, could you please grab some hay? From the ‘food hay’ bin?”

            “They eat hay too?”

            “Yep!” Kaede headed outside and toward the hutch while Kotetsu picked up some hay. Outside, he found her standing still in front of the hutch door.

            “What is it, munchkin?” Kotetsu asked.

            “It’s Fluffy!” Kaede squeaked. Kotetsu followed her gaze to her feet where a black and white bunny was poking it’s head out of the flap at the bottom of the door. It’s little nose wiggled, smelling the air and probably the food they were carrying.

            “Our first bunny sighting!” Kotetsu laughed. “He’s pretty adorable.”

            “Wait until you see all of them.” Kaede smiled. Carefully, she unlatched the door and opened it, making sure Fluffy didn’t get stuck in the flap. The smell of the hutch immediately hit Kotetsu. It was similar to that of a barn – mostly hay and earth with the pungent scent of waste mixed in. Fluffy bounded inside and up a wooden ramp to a low wooden platform that also housed some wire cages. Water bottles were attached to the wire mesh in several places. A couple more rabbits poked their heads up from inside the cages and sniffed the air.

            “That’s Mr. Jingly,” Kaede said, pointing to a floppy-eared brown bunny that hopped out of the cage to join Fluffy. “And that’s Penny. She’s got a fur patch shaped like a star!” When she also made her way to the platform, Kotetsu saw that indeed one of her reddish brown patches resembled a star. “And there should be one more.” She glanced around. “Where is – ” Kaede gasped. “Dad, don’t move.”

            Kotetsu froze. “What, what?” A spider? Squirrel? Ghosts??

            “You have a friend!” Kaede pointed to his foot. Kotetsu looked down and his heart melted. A light brown rabbit gazed up at him with big brown eyes, one paw resting on his shoe. It’s pink nose sniffed and twitched at the air.

            “Hello,” Kotetsu cooed. The bunny tilted its head a little, ears twitching. “Wow, this one’s really cute.” Kotetsu managed to turn his gaze to his daughter. “What’s its name?”

            Kaede giggled a little before answering. “His name is Barnaby!”

            “Eh?!” Kotetsu looked back down at the rabbit.

            “We named him after the robotics professor, Barnaby Brooks Jr!” Kaede placed the food she was holding in a couple of trays on the wooden platform and walked over. “A few of us in class went to science camp together and got to go to his lab over the summer.” She knelt down and picked up the rabbit. “See how he’s got curly fur? It reminded us of his hair!” She blushed a little and giggled.

            Kotetsu nodded slowly, stifling a laugh. He was trying not to imagine his professor with bunny ears as Kaede continued.

            “He was so nice, Dad! He let each of us try controlling one of his robots!” She smiled at the rabbit in her arms fondly before trading him for the hay Kotetsu held. He gingerly held the bunny-Barnaby in his arms.

            “So soft.” He murmured. Kaede continued her story as she arranged the hay.

            “I had some trouble with it, but he patiently explained what all the buttons and levers did. He’s such a great teacher!” Kaede gasped, eyes sparkling as she looked up at Kotetsu. “And he teaches at your university, right? Have you seen him? Have you _met_ him?? Is he nice???”

            “Whoa, one question at a time!” Kotetsu held the hand not supporting the rabbit up in front of him. He took a calming breath before answering. “Yes, he does teach there. And yes I have seen him. He’s actually teaching one of my classes.”

            Kaede gasped excitedly but her look turned skeptical. “But, Dad, aren’t you taking psychology? Not robotics?”

            “Well, yes, but I needed a science elective.” Kotetsu explained. His expression turned sheepish. “I wanted one that wouldn’t have a lot of math in it but...” Kotetsu laughed awkwardly.

            “Dad, computers run on math and robots run on computers. You should have figured there would be math!”

            “I know, I know! Your dad doesn’t think very well sometimes.” Kotetsu laughed. “But it’s okay because – to answer another of your questions – Professor Barnaby _is_ nice. And I agree, an amazing teacher. He’s helping me out a lot with the math.” Bunny-Barnaby snuggled up against Kotetsu’s chest as if to confirm.

            “You’re so lucky!” Kaede said. “I wish he could teach me math...” Kotetsu ruffled her hair a little.

            “Don’t worry, I bet he’ll still be teaching when you’re old enough to attend university! You may get your chance yet!”

            Kaede’s eyes sparkled a little. “Really? I hope so!” She smiled and looked around confidently. “Alright, Dad, time to clean out the cages!”

            “We have to what?”

           

            The sun had set when Kotetsu and Kaede returned home. He found the dishes clean, and sitting in the drying rack. He thanked both his mother and brother, since neither would own up to completing the task, and retired to the guest room. Kotetsu was working on his robotics assignment when he heard a small knock at the door.

            “Come in.” Kotetsu invited. The door slid open slowly revealing Kaede in her pajamas, holding something behind her back. “What’s up, Kaede?”

            “Um, Dad,” She began. “Since you know Professor Barnaby and are probably going to see him again...” Kaede brought the object she was hiding quickly in front of her. “Will you ask him to sign this for me _please_?” 

            Kotetsu took the magazine Kaede had thrust in his face. Barnaby was on the cover, hair pulled back into a ponytail and sporting a white lab coat. His usual hexagonal lenses had been replaced by safety glasses with side shields. He smiled.

            “Sure, I’ll ask him for you.” Kotetsu grinned as Kaede did a little jump in the air.

            “Thank you, Dad!” she practically squealed. Then her bubbliness disappeared and she took on a wary tone. “Just, don’t ask weirdly okay? I don’t want you to weird him out.”

            “Weird? Me?” Kotetsu put on his best taken-aback look. Kaede just nodded. He pouted.

            “Just ask nicely, okay?” Kaede said, hands on her hips.

            “Okay, okay.” Kotetsu relented. “Good night, Kaede.”

            “Good night, Dad.” Kaede smiled. “And thank you!” The sparkle returning to her eyes, she shut the sliding door behind her.

            Kotetsu smiled to himself and turned his attention back to the magazine cover. Barnaby stood beside a small robot that came up to about his knees. The headline read ‘Developing a one-machine bomb squad: Current research of Professor Barnaby Brooks Jr.’.

            “Wow...”

            He flipped through the magazine and located the article. It was accompanied by several pictures of Barnaby working in his lab and preliminary diagrams of the robot he was working on. Completely forgetting his assignment, Kotetsu sprawled on the futon he had laid out and read the entire article. He marveled at the ingenuity and creativity of it all. Barnaby was truly something else.

            Finished, he closed the magazine and revisited the cover. Barnaby smiled out at him from the glossy paper. Kotetsu sat up and stared at him. Thinking back to his high school science classes, he wondered how Barnaby managed to look so good in safety glasses. He sighed and placed the magazine next to his assignment.

            Then he thought. Kotetsu thought about Barnaby’s smile and how his heart beat a little faster because of it. He thought about the way Barnaby coaxed the answers out of him and praised him when he came to the right conclusion. He pictured the way Barnaby’s hair framed his face, and imagined him pulling it back into a ponytail to keep it out of the way. He thought back to how soft bunny-Barnaby’s fur was and wondered if Barnaby’s hair was equally as soft.

            Kotetsu’s breath caught in his throat and he had to cough in order to keep breathing afterwards. He was nonplussed at how easy it was to think of Barnaby, how quickly he could remember all of the little things that intrigued him. It was definitely something more than just physical attraction, that much Kotetsu had to admit. But define what _it_ was? No, he couldn’t do that quite yet.

            _Guess I’ll just have to go back for more._

            Kotetsu chuckled softly before looking back over his assignment. Knowing there were at least three questions he couldn’t tackle yet, he would definitely _have_ to see Barnaby again. The very idea put a smile on his face.


	6. The Bittersweetness of Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternatively titled 'Kotetsu stares at Barnaby. A lot'.
> 
> I'm super sorry this chapter is up quite a bit later than I expected it to be! It's a bit longer than normal, so hopefully that counts for something haha. If you ever want to know a rough timeline for when I'll have the next chapter you can always message me on tumblr! (same username there as here)
> 
> Once again, thank you for all the lovely comments! ^^ I love reading them. I hope you enjoy this chapter!

 

            Kotetsu arrived a little late to his Thursday tutorial with Professor Barnaby. Out loud he would blame it on his psychology professor running the lecture late, but in truth he’d been trying to think of a ‘not weird’ way to ask Barnaby for his autograph. He knew Kaede wouldn’t have given him a warning without probable cause, but Kotetsu couldn’t actually think of a time when he had weirded someone out. _Kaede could probably come up with a few,_ he mused.

            As he approached the office, Kotetsu decided to not mince words and just ask politely. Besides, if he could have weirded Barnaby out, he probably would have done it by now! He knocked on the door and heard the familiar voice telling him to enter. Barnaby sat forward in his chair and gave Kotetsu a bright smile.

            “Good afternoon, Kotetsu-san.”

            “Afternoon, Professor!” Kotetsu greeted while putting his bag down on the left chair. “Sorry I’m late; lecture ran a little long.”

            “Not a problem,” Barnaby assured. “Shall we get started?”

            “Ye-ahh but first,” Kotetsu rifled through his bag. “I have a small favour to ask of you.” His hand around the magazine Kaede had provided, Kotetsu’s pulse quickened.

            “A favour?” Barnaby looked at him quizzically.

            “Uh.” He began eloquently. “Yeah.” Kotetsu exhaled a smile. “I found out my daughter’s a huge fan of yours. She visited your lab at science camp last summer.” Kotetsu took the magazine out of his bag. “She asked me to get you to sign this.” He shrugged apologetically. “If you wouldn’t mind?”

            “Of course I don’t mind!” Barnaby quickly took the offered publication, all smiles. “So, she was one of the students from the science camp? How did she like it?”

            “She loved it!” Kotetsu took the opportunity to sit down. “She sang your praises for a good five minutes, if not longer.” He smirked. Barnaby’s cheeks flushed red.

            “I’m flattered,” he said, trying not to smile but clearly failing. He adjusted his glasses. “Your daughter is too kind.” Barnaby uncapped the sharpie marker he had retrieved. “May I know her name for the autograph?”

            “Ah, it’s Kaede.” Kotetsu explained how to write it properly. He paused a moment, watching Barnaby’s penmanship before continuing. “Thank you so much for doing this, Professor. She’ll be ecstatic when she sees it.”

            Barnaby finished writing in a flourish and capped the marker. “It’s no problem at all, Kotetsu-san.” He handed the magazine back. “She even picked one of my favourite articles.”

            “Oh, yeah?” Kotetsu prompted.

            “Yes.” He adjusted his glasses again. “It focuses more on my lab and my research than, well, me.” He sighed. “Sometimes I think all that matters to people is my youth and good looks. I want to be known for my work and not...my face.”

            Before Kotetsu could stop himself he replied: “You do have a nice face though.”

            Both of them froze.

            Barnaby seemed to get a hold of himself first and he pushed his glasses up his nose. Kotetsu berated himself for his instinctive comment but noticed Barnaby’s hand hadn’t come away from his face. Unintentionally, Kotetsu stared at him. With the shadow from the office light, he couldn’t be sure but...it looked like he was smiling.

            Barnaby abruptly cleared his throat, making Kotetsu jump a little. He looked away quickly, knowing Barnaby totally knew that Kotetsu knew that he caught him staring. But how could he not stare? Professor Barnaby had just looked so cute.

            Kotetsu’s heart did a funny backflip before crash landing as Barnaby brought his attention back.

            “So, Kotetsu-san, do you have any questions about the assignment?”

            Clearing his mind of wandering thoughts with a little shake, Kotetsu responded. “Yes, I do!” He hurriedly retrieved his notes and carefully stowed the magazine in his bag. He pointed to a set of questions on the assignment sheet. “These questions I couldn’t do last time – now that we’ve covered them in lecture, I need some clarification.”

            Kotetsu explained the parts he was having trouble with and Barnaby helped him work through them. A hint there, a new math concept here, the usual. Kotetsu got distracted a few times by the bounce of Barnaby’s curls and the accompanying faint scent of citrus. He couldn’t decide whether the smell was coming from an orange in the Professor’s desk or the products he used to style his hair. Either way, the aroma was a pleasant one.

            The last question proved to be more difficult than the rest. Even with Barnaby’s hints, Kotetsu was still floundering. He sighed and scratched the side of his head absentmindedly. Glancing up, he found the Professor staring at the wall to his left. The afternoon sun from the window behind him framed his curls and profile beautifully. If the office lights weren’t on, Kotetsu imagined he’d have an almost angelic glow around him. Kotetsu had to take a slow breath in.

            Barnaby made to move and Kotetsu quickly looked back down at his work. He was mentally chastising himself for staring _again_ when Barnaby spoke up.

            “How are you fairing on that question, Kotetsu-san?”

            Kotetsu smiled meekly. “Not very well...”

            “Should I have a look at it for you?” Barnaby offered, sitting up straighter in his chair.

            “Sure,” Kotetsu shrugged and handed the paper over. He rolled his shoulders a little, then stretched his arms above his head, groaning a little. A little tension eased, and with nothing else to do, he looked back to Barnaby.

            Whose brow was rather furrowed.

            “Did I screw up that badly?” Kotetsu winced. Barnaby blinked as he looked up.

            “No,” he stated. “I think you’re doing the wrong question.”

            “Oh.” Kotetsu’s eyes widened. “Wouldn’t be the first time!” he laughed.

            “Could you pull out the assignment sheet for me?” Barnaby asked, reaching over to grab the textbook. Kotetsu obliged and provided the assignment sheet. He watched as the Professor expertly flipped the textbook pages, brow still furrowed. When he seemingly arrived at the correct page, Barnaby let out an exasperated breath.

            “The question number on the assignment is wrong.” He sighed, running a hand through his hair as he sat up. The gesture had Kotetsu mesmerized. It took him a couple of seconds to respond.

            “So, I didn’t read it wrong?”

            “No, no, it was my fault, I apologize. The actual question is the one before it.” Barnaby sighed again, but smiled. “It’s a good thing you caught it. I might not have heard anything otherwise.”

            “I didn’t catch anything, I just couldn’t figure it out!” Kotetsu laughed. “I’ll try out the actual question now.”

            “Do you mind if I type up an e-mail to the class while you do that?” Barnaby asked, already shaking the mouse to wake up his computer.

            “Go ahead.” Kotetsu turned the textbook so he could read it and found the correct question. Reading over the problem, he thought: _Oh yeah, I think I can do this one._

            The sounds of pencil scratching and fingers tapping filled the small office. Kotetsu nodded to himself as he worked through the problem, pieces coming together like a puzzle in his head. When he was close to the answer, Kotetsu snuck a peek at Barnaby, whose tapping had ceased a few seconds before.

            The light from the monitor reflected off Barnaby’s glasses, making it difficult to see his eyes, but Kotetsu could tell he was reviewing the words written on the screen. Barnaby’s hand rested against his lips, his hair still perfectly framing his face. Kotetsu found it difficult to look away. To think Barnaby could hold his attention for so long...

            He kept staring even as Barnaby sat up and sent the e-mail. Barnaby turned and for a moment their eyes met. Kotetsu saw a sparkle in those green eyes and found his heart in his throat. He tore his gaze away, only to have to look back up as Barnaby questioned him.

            “How’s it going?”

            Kotetsu swallowed, his voice hitching a little as he spoke. “Good, now that I’ve got the right question.” He grinned teasingly, ignoring the hitch. Barnaby returned the favour with a cheeky glare and a smile.

            “Keep up that attitude and I’ll have to dock you a couple marks.”

            Kotetsu laughed. “With the help you’ve given me, I’ll still pass though!”

            Barnaby’s expression softened. He shook his head slightly but he didn’t say anything. Kotetsu decided to continue on that train of thought.

            “I really can’t thank you enough for this, Professor Barnaby.” He smiled sincerely and when Barnaby’s expression mirrored his, he felt all bubbly.

            “Don’t mention it, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby’s hand twitched toward Kotetsu, but he drew it back. “I’m always happy to help.”

            Kotetsu sighed lightly and contently, his gaze loosely focused on Barnaby. Despite the assignment in front of him and the several others he had for the rest of his courses, Kotetsu felt a sort of calm. It reminded him of the feeling he got at home – a sense of belonging. He met Barnaby’s eyes again, and again his heart leapt. Kotetsu hoped this wouldn’t become a regular thing.

            The younger now averted his gaze quickly and coughed lightly into his hand. The calm dissolved and a sort of tension replaced it. For the first time, the silence between them felt awkward.

            Kotetsu dropped his gaze back to his papers, feeling heat creep onto his face. Inhaling a little quicker than he wanted to, Kotetsu began to pack up his things.

            “I think I’m good for this assignment, Professor.”

            “You have no further questions?” Barnaby asked, sitting forward a little.

            “Yeah, I should have everything.” Kotetsu did his best to smile, though his heart was beating fearfully fast. “If I find I need something else I can always send you an e-mail.”

            “True.” Barnaby said curtly, nodding shallowly. It seemed like he wanted to say something further, but Barnaby remained silent. Kotetsu finished gathering up his things, doing his best to avoid eye contact. He was sure his heart would beat right out of his chest if he didn’t do anything about it. He shouldered his bag and put his hat back on before finally turning to his professor.

            “Thanks again for the autograph. Kaede’s going to love it.”

            “It’s no problem, really.” Barnaby shook his head, curls bouncing this way and that. Kotetsu stood awkwardly for a moment, once again mesmerized by the movement.

            “Alright,” Kotetsu nodded sharply and turned to the door. “See you in lecture tomorrow, Professor!” He heard Barnaby give a quick “See you, Kotetsu-san!” as he headed out the door.

            Kotetsu quickly rounded the corner to the stairwell. He took the stairs two at a time, not stopping on the landing between the third and fourth floors like usual. His pulse was racing; it urged him to keep moving forward. He didn’t stop moving until he was outside and taking a breath of fresh air.

            After a couple of long breaths leaning against the wall, Kotetsu’s heart was still beating like a drummer on steroids. And it couldn’t have been just from the stairs down; he was still in shape despite having injured his back. Kotetsu sighed. It was probably a side effect of how beautiful Barnaby had looked today.

            Kotetsu breathed again and shook his head, trying to make sense of his jumbled emotions. _Calm down, Kotetsu. Think._ He started walking towards the parking lot as he considered the facts:

            Whenever he made eye contact with Barnaby, his heart beat faster. Whenever Barnaby smiled, he smiled in return. And whenever Barnaby’s hair bounced, he had a strange urge to tug on one of those curls to see if it sprang back into place.

            Kotetsu found the first two points easily explained away with human nature.

            Firstly, staring into someone’s eyes, it’s like you’re squaring off. Adrenaline starts pumping, heart races. Easy. Secondly, when someone smiles at you, they’re happy. If you’re also happy and you want to show it, you smile back. A simple gesture that Kotetsu did to everyone – his family, friends, cashiers, people he’d rescued from burning buildings. Nothing special!

            The third was a little more difficult. Was his end goal to tease Barnaby? To see the annoyed face he’d make? Or was Kotetsu actually a five-year-old on the inside, amused greatly by considerably smaller things in life? _Probably the latter_.

            But what did it matter? Kotetsu was admittedly fonder of the littler things in life. His kid’s smile, a perfect plate of fried rice, that sparkle in Barnaby’s eyes.

            Kotetsu stopped before the parking lot opening and waited for a couple of cars to pass. He supposed that was one of the more recent things he enjoyed. Kotetsu shrugged and continued towards his car. He was almost there when –

            “Oof – sorry mister!”

            “Ah, sorry!”

            A pair of students appeared out of nowhere, bumping into Kotetsu and skipping ahead along the row of parked cars. Laughing and holding hands, they stole a kiss from one another before ducking in between two vehicles. Kotetsu huffed a laugh before turning to his own car and unlocking the door. But he didn’t get in right away. Seeing his reflection in the car window, Kotetsu paused.

            His mouth was smiling, but his eyes were shimmering with tears unshed. As they started to slide down his face, Kotetsu thought he understood the emotions he was dealing with.

            He quickly got into his car, pushed the seat back all the way and tucked his legs against his chest. He hugged himself tightly, tears freely flowing now. He clung to himself, needing something, anything, to hold onto. A sob escaped unbidden, and he let the next few out without a fuss.

            Kotetsu felt so conflicted; he was giddy, sad, and terrified all at the same time. He took a few deep breaths and thought things out. The giddiness was most definitely because he liked Barnaby. Like, _liked_ Barnaby. He was so stupid, how could he not have seen it before? The heart racing, the sparkling, the desire to touch his hair, it all made sense. He snorted a laugh realizing his mother had known last weekend, known before he even had a clue...just like last time.

            He let his mind wander to Tomoe, remembering the way her smile reached her brown eyes, how she positively glowed when she first held Kaede. How her long hair caught the wind – and how the wind blew it back in her face. Kotetsu laughed softly, tears continuing to roll down his cheeks. He missed her so much. And even though he knew it wasn’t true, part of him thought his feelings for Barnaby would replace those he had for her. This was the source of his sadness.

            The pit in his stomach – the terrified bit of him – spoke next, slowly making his limbs go cold. He had a major crush on his professor; his friend. Kotetsu was scared Barnaby might find out – what would he think of him? What should he do?

            Kotetsu shook his head lightly and concentrated on his breathing for a few moments, putting his emotions to rest. He sighed loudly, drained of any energy he thought he had.

            “I’m a mess.” He whispered.

            After a few moments of silence, Kotetsu retracted his statement. He wasn’t a mess, he was organized chaos! He knew where everything was if he needed to find something. And Kotetsu knew what his heart was telling him.

            He wanted what those passing students had. He wanted it again.

            He wanted it with Barnaby.

 

***

 

            Barnaby sat silently going over the marked assignments his TA had given him. His now empty wine glass from dinner rested on the table to his left, his laptop on the couch to his right. The low rumble of Wednesday evening traffic percolated into his fifth floor apartment. Every so often, Barnaby would hear the tap in the kitchen go on and then off again. His own short typing also interrupted the silence, when he entered a percentage into the grading workbook.

            Footsteps sounded from the kitchen and Matt appeared at the end table. He grabbed the empty wine glass.

            “Almost missed one!”

            “Close call!” Barnaby chuckled as Matt made his way to the kitchen once more. He returned to his work, a small smile on his face. Over halfway done already, Barnaby was determined to finish this tonight.

            He soon heard footsteps from the kitchen again. This time, Matt vaulted over the couch to sit next to Barnaby’s laptop. Barnaby instinctively pulled the computer closer to him, his heart missing a beat when Matt landed.

            “Close call.” Barnaby repeated.

            “I wasn’t gonna sit on your laptop.” Matt said, sliding over.

            “You almost did!” Barnaby half-heartedly glared at him.

            “Whatever, it’s fine.” Matt grinned. He pointed to the assignment stack. “Those from your Introductory class?”

            “Yes, I’m just checking over the marking.”

            “Hmmm...”

            Barnaby carefully kept his eyes on the papers. He knew that tone of voice – Matt wanted something – and he was going to use his puppy-dog eyes to get it.

            “How’s the old guy you’re tutoring doing?”

            “Kotetsu-san?” Barnaby blinked. “He’s doing quite well actually.”

            “Oh,” Matt continued in the tone. “Is that his assignment there?”

            “Hm?” Barnaby looked at the name on the top assignment and it was indeed Kotetsu’s. Matt leaned over for a closer look. “Matt, you really shouldn’t be looking at my student’s work.”

            “What am I gonna do?” Matt asked, glancing towards Barnaby, who made the mistake of returning his gaze. His round, blue eyes twinkled mischievously. _Damn puppy-dog eyes._

            Barnaby sighed, defeated, unable to come up with a reason besides ‘it’s the principle of the thing’. He handed Kotetsu’s assignment to Matt.

            “Oooo, ninety-three percent! Nice.” Matt nodded appreciatively. “What’re these scribbles under his name?”

            Barnaby looked over to see where Matt was pointing. He exhaled disapprovingly.

            “Those aren’t scribbles; it’s his name written in kanji.”

            Matt squinted at the characters. “Now, I know you can’t read these. How can you tell?”

            “The ‘T’ initial in the middle. It’s in both.” Barnaby smiled, one part condescending for showing Matt up in the logic department, one part affectionate at Kotetsu’s consistency. He’d been meaning to ask Kotetsu what the characters meant after seeing them on the first assignment. It had just never come up in conversation.

            “You still in there, Barnaby?”

            Matt was waving his hand in front of Barnaby’s face. Barnaby shook his head little.

            “Yeah, just spacing out. Sorry.”

            “You’ve been doing that a lot lately.” Matt sat back a little. “You get this real wistful look in your eyes and just stare off into space for a few moments.”

            “Have I?” Barnaby wondered. _I couldn’t have been thinking about –_

            “Never lasts long, though.”

            Barnaby had definitely been thinking about Kotetsu. He always managed to shake himself out of those trains of thought pretty quickly. Barnaby shook his head apologetically.

            “Sorry, Matt. It’s nothing to worry about, really.”

            Matt nodded and took a breath before continuing.

            “So, it’s your birthday in a few weeks, right?”

            Barnaby blinked. “Yes...?” _And a few more until our anniversary._

            “I was thinking of doing something special. Going away for the weekend. Like, we take the Friday off and make it a long weekend. How does that sound?” Matt looked over expectantly. Barnaby smiled widely.

            “That sounds great! Which weekend were you thinking?”

            “The twenty-sixth to the twenty-eighth. Weekend before your birthday.”

            Barnaby nodded. “I should be able to swing that. I can get my TAs to fill in for my lectures. Let’s book it!”

            Matt grinned and stood up. “I’ll book the place. It’ll be a nice surprise for you.”

            “I can’t wait.” Barnaby laughed and looked up at Matt expectantly. Matt moved over to the entrance way and grabbed his coat. Barnaby put the assignments aside and got off the couch. “Are you leaving already?”

            “Uh, yeah.” Matt shrugged into his coat. “I’ve got some things still to do at home tonight.”

            “Oh,” Barnaby said. “Okay.”

            “See you later! I’ll text you when I get there.” Matt waved, opening the door.

            “Drive safely!”

            The door shut behind Matt with a click.

            Barnaby sighed. “Sometimes I still don’t understand him.” He pouted. “I didn’t even get a goodbye kiss!” Barnaby continued pouting for a moment until he remembered the birthday trip. A smile crept onto his face. “I wonder where we’ll go...”

            Returning to the couch, Barnaby resumed the task at hand. Kotetsu’s assignment sat on the top of the pile still. Barnaby sighed.

            “You’ve caused me a lot of trouble, old man.”

            The paper remained silent.

            “But I can’t get mad at you for being yourself.”

            As Barnaby entered Kotetsu’s grade into the workbook, he mentally tallied his feelings as well. And in placing the assignment on the done pile, he neatly filed his emotions away too.

 

 

            Barnaby found the next day’s tutorial session rather short. Kotetsu didn’t have any questions about the midterm review problems, just a few about some of the course material. That should have been a good thing, but Kotetsu seemed rather tense. Concerned, Barnaby couldn’t help but bring it up. After all, Kotetsu had done that for him once before.

            “Kotetsu-san?”

            “Yes?!” Kotetsu answered almost too loudly. He paused in packing up his belongings.

            “Are you okay? You seem rather stressed – ”

            “Stressed? Uh yeah, that’s it.” Kotetsu swallowed nervously. “I’ve got this midterm and a ton of papers due next week. I don’t know how kids do this...”

            “Well, if you’re feeling overwhelmed, I can help schedule your midterm for a later date – ”

            “Ah, no, no you don’t have to do that!” Kotetsu had finished returning his things to his bag and he slung it over his shoulder. “I’ll be fine, don’t worry about it.”

            Barnaby narrowed his eyes for a second, but then relaxed his expression. “Alright, but if it gets to be too much, please let me know.”

            Kotetsu quickly nodded. “I will!” He tugged his hat on and headed for the door. “See you, Professor!”

            “See y- ” The door shut with a clunk. “-ou...” Barnaby let out a breath and shook his head. _He’s probably just got a lot on his mind. It is his first semester back._

            Barnaby recalled the past few lectures. Kotetsu’s wave to him had been getting a little smaller, though Barnaby still saw it. The lecture _was_ a bit fuller now, this close to the midterm. Kotetsu was probably just feeling some anxiety from that. Or something. Barnaby shrugged; he wasn’t a psychologist.

            “Though he really should tell me if he’s worried about something...” But were they close enough friends to do that? What even was their relationship?

            Barnaby ran a hand through his hair in exasperation. But there really was no use worrying over this. If Kotetsu had something to say, he’d say it.

            Nodding to himself, Barnaby woke up his computer to go over the midterm one last time before having it printed.

 


	7. It's Not the Falling Down...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, sorry it's been a while!! I've been sitting on this for a while since my beta hasn't had time to read it yet, but I feel kind of bad for leaving you all hanging! If there are any major changes to this chapter in the future I'll let you know (tho I don't expect there to be). Chapter 8 will hopefully be up by the end of May, but since I'm gonna be super busy soon I can't promise that.
> 
> Anyway, thanks for all the comments and kudos! I love getting them :) Enjoy!

             The next two weeks flew by for Barnaby. He didn’t see much of Matt; the prepping, giving, and marking of the midterms for the three classes he taught keeping him busy. Luckily, Matt was complaining less than he normally did. Probably since he had been through this three times before. Barnaby did miss him, but with each passing day, the weekend getaway he had been promised drew closer. His TAs had agreed to cover the classes he would be missing, so Barnaby officially had the Friday off too. He smiled to himself and glanced at the clock: 1:52pm.

            Barnaby had seen even less of Kotetsu, who he hadn’t spoken to since their tutorial before the midterm. Their session the week prior would have been the day after the midterm, with no new assignments to speak of, so they canceled it. In the lectures following that Thursday, Barnaby had noticed that Kotetsu’s waves had perked up again, which he was grateful for. It was good to see that the stress of midterms and papers hadn’t beaten him.

            Swiveling idly in his office chair, Barnaby let his mind wander as the time grew closer to two o’clock. He had handed out the third assignment to his Introductory class on Monday, so Kotetsu was bound to have questions. He had done quite well on the midterm, so he would probably be in a good mood today, if not feeling a little more confident at least. Barnaby was very tempted to latch onto those good vibes and let Kotetsu know why he would be away tomorrow. After all, he already knew about Matt, and Barnaby was just itching to talk about it. Not that he hadn’t already blabbed to Nathan about it.

            As Barnaby was finishing his thought, his cell phone rang. The tone filled the room as he removed it from his bag. Glancing at the display, he quickly flipped it open.

            “Hello, darling.” He answered melodically.

            A small sigh came from the other line before the caller spoke: “ _Hello, Barnaby_.”

            “I-is something the matter, Matt?” Barnaby asked. “You sound agitated.”

            “ _I’m fine_.” Matt said, sounding even more agitated. “ _Is he there?_ ”

            “He – ?” A small knock sounded at the door. Barnaby stood up and moved the phone away from his mouth as he asked his visitor to enter. Speaking back into the microphone, Barnaby said: “Kotetsu-san is here now, if that’s who you were talking about?” He gave Kotetsu an apologetic smile as he set his things on one of the chairs. Barnaby pointed from the phone to the small picture frame on his desk; the one with his and Matt’s photo in it. After a moment, Kotetsu silently showed his understanding and nodded his acquiescence.

            “ _He is who I meant._ ” Matt confirmed. “ _Is he listening?_ ”

            Barnaby blinked. “No, why would he be?” When he didn’t get an immediate answer, he continued quietly, “What are you trying to get at, Matt?”

            There was a sarcastic huff of laughter from the phone. “ _As if you don’t know._ ”

            “I-I really don’t?”

            “ _I’ve found out what you’re doing these Thursday afternoons._ ”

           Barnaby scoffed. “Tutoring my student?” He shook his head in disbelief. “I told you that two months ago.” Another huff of laughter from Matt. “Are you drunk or something?”

            “ _HA! I wish I was!_ ” Matt laughed drily. “ _That would make this so much easier._ ”

            A small part of Barnaby’s stomach filled with dread. He couldn’t think of anything to say, so he just waited, the cold feeling slowly filling his abdomen. Matt continued in a whisper.

            “ _I never thought you capable of something like this but..._ ” He raised his voice. “ _Are you cheating on me, Barnaby?_ ”

            The dread turned to ice in Barnaby’s stomach as the pieces started to click into place. _Matt thinks I’m cheating on him with..._ he flicked a quick glance at his student, feeling his face heat up. From anger or embarrassment, he wasn’t sure. Barnaby turned to face the window.

            “No, of course not! Why- why would you even think that?!”

            The dread-ice started to melt, leaving an unpleasant feeling that made his hairs stand on end. On the other side of the line, Matt breathed in slowly.

            “ _You’re serious._ ”

            “Dead serious.” Barnaby’s flush was full anger now. He could feel himself glaring but at what, he couldn’t say. His entire focus was on the sounds coming from the phone speaker. He heard a quiet, sad laugh.

            “ _I...I’m glad but...that doesn’t make this next part any easier._ ”

            “...next part?” Barnaby’s heart dropped, the dread-ice consuming it and refreezing.

            “ _I’m really sorry to do this right before your birthday but..._ ” Matt took a deep breath. “ _It’s for the best._ ”

            Barnaby knew what was coming, he could feel it. He slowly shook his head as he tried to make his case.

            “Matt, you don’t have to, we can work this out, we – ”

            “ _No, we can’t._ ” He sighed. “ _It’s over, Barnaby._ ”

            Barnaby’s protests died in his throat. His thoughts were so lost, his mind so jumbled that he almost didn’t hear Matt’s quiet admittance:

            “ _I...I’ve found someone else._ ”

            Barnaby’s head snapped up with shocking clarity. “You what?”

            “ _I’ll have my stuff out of your apartment by tonight. If I don’t see you, I’ll leave my key at the front desk._ ”

            “Matt – !”

            “ _Goodbye, Barnaby._ ”

            The line clicked dead.

            Barnaby slowly brought the phone down from his ear to rest at his side. His insides were a mess of shock and disbelief but the anger soon bubbled up fiercely. He snapped his phone shut and hurled it across the room. But instead of the satisfying clatter of phone on floor, Barnaby heard a low grunt.

            _Shit._

            “Kotetsu-san!” Barnaby whirled around to find Kotetsu cradling his phone in his hands. He laughed softly.

            “Good thing it’s not broken.”

            Barnaby quickly sat down in his chair and pulled himself close to the desk.

            “Kotetsu-san, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to throw my phone at you.” Barnaby reached for the device with both hands and scooped it from Kotetsu’s. “I...I kind of forgot you were here.”

            “Don’t worry about it.” Kotetsu shook his head slightly and looked up, concern evident on his face. He opened his mouth to say something but stopped. Barnaby waited with baited breath, both wanting and not wanting Kotetsu to say anything. In the end, Kotetsu took a deep breath and let it out in an airy, “Are you okay?”

            Barnaby took a deep breath of his own and exhaled it shakily. His hot, adrenaline-fueled anger was slowly subsiding and he could feel the cold dread back in his stomach. That whole phone call seemed so surreal. How was it possible that in two short minutes someone he’d spent almost two years with was just out of his life? ...And probably spending time with someone else.

            Barnaby felt his mouth twitch as he played the conversation back in his head. But he didn’t notice his vision getting blurry until Kotetsu called softly to him.

            “Professor?”

            Barnaby turned his gaze to his student, the tears filling his eyes obscuring Kotetsu’s image. Barnaby quickly tried to wipe them from the corners of his eyes but more just came to take their place.

            “I – I’m fine.”

            It came out choppy, a little choked up. He knew Kotetsu saw right through his front, but he had to keep it up. He was a professional, in a professional environment. He couldn’t let his emotions run his actions. They were just feelings.

            Barnaby took a deep breath to steel himself. Calmly, he wiped the tears away from his eyes, satisfied they weren’t replaced this time. He would deal with his feelings later.

            “I’m fine.” He said again, but it was still choked, still full of raw emotion. Barnaby chanced a glance at Kotetsu.

            The worry was plain on his face. Kotetsu’s eyebrows were drawn together, his amber eyes filled with concern. Barnaby looked away. He felt guilty trying to lie to Kotetsu but their relationship was professional and he had to keep it –

            Something warm slid under Barnaby’s right hand and curled around it. Kotetsu’s hand was calloused, a little rough against Barnaby’s, but it fit perfectly.

            “Barnaby,” Kotetsu’s soft voice called, causing Barnaby to finally look back up. The older man’s face bore a gentle smile as he continued. “It’s okay to cry if you’re hurting.”

            Barnaby drew a shaky breath in.

            “I...I know but...” Barnaby protested weakly, the tears welling up again. Any air of professionalism he had left was completely dissolved. There was no need for it anymore, he realized, with Kotetsu calling him by his name without so much as a ‘professor’ to accompany it.

            The tears began to slide down his face, and Barnaby laid down his head, left arm curled under it on the desk. His glasses pressed against his face, digging into the bridge of his nose. They poked at his arm too, but he didn’t care. He let the tears fall freely, let himself sob miserably. _There was no need for professionalism at all_ , Barnaby thought. _I just didn’t want him to see me like this._

            Barnaby squeezed Kotetsu’s hand. He couldn’t know just how comforting that was, having that contact. Kotetsu didn’t say anything at the gesture. A moment later, he began rubbing circles on the back of Barnaby’s hand.

            The rhythmic motion had a soothing effect, and Barnaby found himself concentrating on it. Sobs wracked his body for a few moments more before eventually slowing. His breathing fell in time to the gentle circles Kotetsu was making. All the excess emotional energy he had produced just drained away.

            When Barnaby found his voice again, he spoke clearly, though it was muffled by the desk.

            “Kotetsu-san...”

            “Yes?” His response was quiet and soft. The circles continued.

            Barnaby took a long breath in. He knew Kotetsu wouldn’t ask for an explanation, but he felt he owed it to him. His words came out almost too fast.

            “Matt broke up with me.”

            The circles stopped. Barnaby wanted to see the expression on Kotetsu’s face, but he knew his glasses were tearstained and lifting his head up now wouldn’t do any good. Besides, he wasn’t sure if he had the energy just yet.

            “On the phone just now?” Kotetsu asked, his tone surprised. Barnaby nodded as best he could with his head still cradled in his arm. Kotetsu squeezed his hand briefly.

            “I’m sorry.”

            Barnaby huffed a laugh. “Why? It’s not your fault.” _Well, maybe it is a little, but that’s only because Matt jumped to conclusions,_ Barnaby added to himself.

            “Yeah, I guess not.” Kotetsu chuckled. He drew another circle on the back of Barnaby’s hand and stopped again. “Thanks for telling me. You didn’t have to, you know.”

            “I know.”

            A few moments passed in silence. Barnaby was very much aware of Kotetsu’s hand still in his. It felt nothing like the dream-hand he held back in September, but it provided the same peace of mind. Barnaby would let go – he knew he had to – but a few more moments wouldn’t hurt.

            Finally, Barnaby sat up a little, removing his glasses with his free hand. He rubbed the bridge of his nose and his left eye. He paused with his middle finger astride his nose and his index finger framing his eye. He looked over at Kotetsu.

            He was blurry. Barnaby smiled.

            Relinquishing Kotetsu’s hand, Barnaby sat up straighter and continued to rub around his eyes. They were probably red and swollen.

            “Feeling any better?” Kotetsu asked.

            “A little, maybe.” Barnaby moved to put his glasses back on but saw the water stains on them and set them back down. “No, not really.” He amended.

            “Yeah, stupid question.” Kotetsu’s voice was a little muffled. Barnaby could just see his hand over his mouth, elbow leaning on the desk. He guessed Kotetsu was looking away at the wall, but without the aid of his glasses he couldn’t be certain.

            Barnaby opened the middle drawer to his left and got out his glasses cleaner. He spritzed both sides of the hexagonal lenses and started to wipe them clean.

            “I’m sorry I took time away from your tutorial, Kotetsu-san. Thank you for being...” He took a breath ... _here._ “...understanding.” Barnaby replaced his glasses and was rewarded with a crystal clear view of Kotetsu’s smile.

            “Don’t worry about it, Professor.” Kotetsu shook his head lightly. “If you’re still not feeling the greatest, we can postpone the tutorial until next week?”

            Barnaby had not even considered that. “No, I want to continue if that’s okay with you. Um, I might just go freshen up a bit first.”

            “Are you sure? I don’t want you to push yourself.” Kotetsu’s face was full of worry again. Barnaby simply smiled.

            “I’m not. It will help take my mind off it, actually.” Barnaby stood up and made his way around the desk towards the door. Only then did he turn back to Kotetsu. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

            “Okay.” Kotetsu nodded.

            Barnaby left and carefully shut the door behind him. He moved slowly down the hallway to the washrooms, feeling unsteady despite his big talk. He slumped against the washroom door, pushing it open in the same motion. He flicked on the lights. The fluorescent tubes took a second to kick in, but their glow soon lit the sinks and stalls.

            Looking at himself in the mirror, Barnaby was very grateful he hadn’t worn any mascara that day. His eyes were bloodshot, the skin around them redder than normal. Any smeared, watery blackness on top of that would have been horrible.

            He removed his glasses, placing them on the ledge below the mirror. He turned the hot water on, letting it run as he tied his hair back with the elastic he always kept in his pocket. After adjusting the water’s temperature, he cupped some in his hands and splashed it on his face. He did this twice more, massaging around his eyes and clearing away any salty residue there. Barnaby turned the water off and held his dripping wet face over the sink, his hands on either side of the basin.

            He spoke softly to himself in the empty room.

            “I no longer have a boyfriend.” He had hoped saying it out loud would make him feel better.

It didn’t. He continued anyway:

            “He broke up with me.” _Over the phone._ “He may have...cheated on me.” _But I’ll never know._ Barnaby sighed deeply and shook his head, water drop flying off his face. “It’s no use worrying about that now.”

            He reached for the paper towel dispenser, grasping the air a couple of times before coming back with two sheets. The paper folded into uncomfortable points as he dried his face with it. As a particularly pointy corner stabbed him in the eyelid, a thought from the back of his mind made itself known.

            _You’re single now._

            Barnaby’s heart thudded painfully in his chest as the emotions he had neatly filed away two weeks ago tried to resurface. They rattled around in the metaphorical filing cabinet he had locked them in, making scary metallic banging sounds. He looked directly at himself in the mirror, close enough that he could see decently without his glasses, and whispered.

            “Kotetsu is your _student_.”

            The cabinet stopped shaking, but it did little to assuage Barnaby. Because the lock on the cabinet had been his existing relationship with Matt, and the fact that Kotetsu was his student was small pieces of duct tape. Put there in case the lock failed during transport, a temporary measure to keep the drawer closed. Barnaby added several more pieces of imaginary duct tape and tried not to remember the feeling of Kotetsu’s hands or the colour of his eyes.

            He replaced his glasses and let his hair fall loosely around his shoulders. Barnaby straightened his bangs, all mussed from lying on them and washing his face. Turning his head side to side, he saw a few of his curls were looking a little flat, but he hadn’t thought to bring his styling cream with him. Well, at least he looked a little better than he felt now. Taking a deep breath, Barnaby headed back to his office.

            A couple steps away, he heard Kotetsu’s voice through the door. Hoping Nathan hadn’t stopped by while he was away, Barnaby opened the door slowly. Inside, he found Kotetsu just ending a call on his cell phone.

            “Hey, Professor. Good to see you!” he smiled. Barnaby couldn’t help but return it – damn that infectious smile.

            “I’m back and ready to teach.” Barnaby crossed the room, around his desk to his chair.

            “You’re amazing.” Kotetsu said softly, but he quickly continued more loudly. “Ahh, but before that!” He waited for Barnaby to sit down. “I have an offer.”

            Barnaby tilted his head. “For what?” Kotetsu’s smile turned a little sheepish.

            “Well – okay so this probably isn’t the best thing to suggest but,” Kotetsu scratched at his head. “A buddy of mine and I were planning on going out drinking tonight and I asked him if you could join us.” Kotetsu waved his phone around. “If you want. To help keep your mind off of things.”

            Barnaby blinked a few times, considering. He did have a more casual outfit here in his office, so he wouldn’t have to go home to change. And he did want to avoid home right now, so he didn’t run into Matt. And Kotetsu’s friend would be there so, it wouldn’t be like a...like a d-

            “Professor?”

            “Ah, I’ll go!” Barnaby jolted, not exactly sure how long he’d been staring into space. But he had made up his mind. “And, I promise not to drink too much. If you’re worried about that.”

            “I am, a little.” Kotetsu admitted. “I’ll make sure Antonio doesn’t challenge you to a drinking contest.” He chuckled. “Because you _will_ lose.”

            “I’ll keep that in mind, just in case he forgets.” Barnaby paused. “Where is the place?”

            “Ah, um...” Kotetsu pondered a moment, chin resting in his hand. “Ha, I can’t remember the address off the top of my head. I can e-mail it to you later?”

            “Text me, it will be faster.” Barnaby could not believe he was saying this. “I’ll give you my number.”

            “Ah...okay!” Kotetsu shrugged and handed his phone to Barnaby after bringing up the contact entry screen. Barnaby managed to enter his digits without breaking his poker face. He never thought he’d ever give out his number to a student. But, well...

            Kotetsu was special.


	8. Just Two Bros on a 'Brate'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please blame the chapter title on myself and my beta who told me I could keep it XD Anyway, apologizes for the wait! This chapter is longer than normal so I hope you all enjoy! To the bar!!

 

            Kotetsu had headed home immediately after his tutorial with Barnaby. Quickly making his way to his apartment, he had distracted himself anyway he could. Reciting any phone numbers he knew by heart, narrating what he was doing, actually remembering to text Barnaby the bar’s address – anything to keep his mind off confronting what he knew. But now, after counting the dots on his apartment ceiling as he lay spread-eagle on his bed, Kotetsu had to think about them. He ran his hand lightly through his hair, scratching his scalp as he did so.

            Barnaby’s long term boyfriend had dumped him – over the phone of all possible ways! – and at a time when he knew Barnaby would be busy... _with me._ Kotetsu wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed, but from the side of the conversation he had heard, he could infer some things. For example, it sounded like Matt didn’t fully trust what Barnaby had told him about them. That they were merely professor and student, nothing more.

            And yes, maybe they were friends too. (Kotetsu smiled and wiggled his feet around a little at the thought.) But having friends outside of your significant other is not something to get upset or jealous about. There was nothing wrong with their relationship.

            Kotetsu thought about his earlier actions and sighed heavily. He really hoped he hadn’t crossed any boundaries in Barnaby’s office. But what should he have done otherwise? Sit back and pretend like nothing had happened?? Watching Barnaby try to hold back his tears and emotions had been almost painful. And letting him do it wouldn’t have helped either of them.

            Kotetsu lifted his right hand above his head, holding it in the air as he turned it over several times, examining it. He hadn’t been thinking about it at the time, but remembering now – Barnaby’s hands had been unusually soft for someone who built robots. Normally, at least some callusing was to be expected – as far as Kotetsu understood anyway. Barnaby must take good care of his skin.

            “Ah, stop thinking about it!” Kotetsu pulled his legs in and circled his feet around each other in the air in exasperation. He definitely wasn’t wondering if he’d get to hold those hands again or what it would be like to interlace their fingers. Kotetsu sat up, desperate for a distraction.

            His stomach grumbled. Belatedly, Kotetsu remembered that he hadn’t picked up anything for dinner. A glance at his watch told him it was just after four. Since he was meeting Antonio at the bar at seven – with Barnaby hopefully showing up around a quarter past seven – he had enough time to go out and come back to cook. Kotetsu nodded and headed off to the supermarket.

 

            Kotetsu’s phone rang as he was enjoying his fried rice. He hurriedly swallowed the bit of shrimp he had been savouring and pulled the device out of his pocket. The display showed a picture of a bull with Antonio’s name underneath it. Kotetsu pressed the green phone button to answer.

            “Hey, what’s up, Antonio?”

            “ _Sorry, Kotetsu, I don’t think I’ll be able to make it tonight_.” Antonio replied. Kotetsu could hear sirens in the background on his friend’s side of the phone.

            “What? I thought you were free tonight!”

            “ _There’s a huge fire over in the downtown area. Four alarm blaze – all hands on deck. You’d be here too, if you hadn’t hurt your back.”_

            “Well, sorry I suck!” Kotetsu pouted. Antonio laughed heartily and Kotetsu sighed, relenting.

            “ _Hey, at least I’m not leaving you alone, right_?” Antonio offered.

            “Ah, yeah...” Kotetsu knew Antonio meant well, but he wasn’t sure if being alone with Barnaby was the best idea. He shook his head. He’d deal with that later. “Alright, you go save some people and don’t die on me, got it?”

            “ _Roger that!_ ” Antonio hung up with a click.

            “Gaaaaah!” Kotetsu griped, nearly overturning his dinner by flopping his arms dramatically on the couch beside him. His phone said it was six-twenty. Maybe there was still time to cancel? He wasn’t sure he could trust his inebriated self to not go saying anything that could complicate things.

            Then again, he usually clammed up when there was something important he should say. So maybe it would be okay.

            The more Kotetsu thought about it, the more he thought this development might actually be a good thing. Professor Barnaby was more likely to open up if it was just him. He knew Kotetsu well, but Antonio not so much. Things like this needed to be talked about. Kotetsu could keep his feelings to himself for one night. _And probably for longer than that_...

            Kotetsu nodded thoughtfully then raised his head up. He should probably make sure this new arrangement was okay with Barnaby instead of just deciding himself. Kotetsu looked at his phone, still in his hand. He _did_ have his professor’s number.

            “Yeah, better call now than have him get to the bar and just want to leave.” He mumbled.

            Kotetsu’s finger hesitated over the green phone icon next to Barnaby’s name before finally touching it. He tried to ignore how fast his heart was beating as the phone rang. After three rings, Barnaby picked up.

            “ _Hello?_ ”

            “Hey, Professor!” Kotetsu said as jovially as possible and maybe a little too loudly. “About tonight. You know how my friend was supposed to join us?”

            “ _Yes._ ” He paused. “ _Antonio, correct?_ ”

           “Yeah. Well, he got called away to a fire a few minutes ago. Four alarms, he said. So unfortunately, he can’t make it.” Kotetsu swallowed nervously. “It’ll just be the two of us...is that okay with you?” Waiting, listening, Kotetsu heard the sound of Barnaby’s slow breathing over a background of chatter.

            “ _Yes, that’s fine_ ,” he finally answered. “ _I’m already on my way anyway, so it would be a little silly for me to cancel now._ ”

            “Already?” Kotetsu asked, incredulously. “But we’re not supposed to meet for another forty-five minutes!”

            Barnaby’s melodic laughter floated out of the phone speaker. “ _I’m taking the bus, so I’ll be a while yet. I wasn’t sure I could leave my car there overnight so..._ ”

            Kotetsu nodded and then realized Barnaby couldn’t see him. “Ah, yeah! That’s probably a good idea, Professor. Drinking and driving do not mix!” He laughed awkwardly.

            “ _Yeah,_ ” Barnaby laughed softly. There was an amiable silence before he continued. “ _Kotetsu-san?_ ”

            “Yes, Professor?”

            “ _Um,_ ” Barnaby paused, his voice barely above a whisper. Kotetsu was amazed he could hear it so clearly. “ _Tonight, since we’re going as friends, could you...just call me Barnaby?_ ”

            Kotetsu felt his face flush, hot and red. He was _very_ glad Barnaby could not see him right now. He took in a shaky breath and answered back, just as quietly:

            “Sure thing, Barnaby.”

            Barnaby let out a small breath. Kotetsu couldn’t be sure of his expression, since he couldn’t see it, but from what he could tell – Barnaby was smiling.

            “ _Thanks. I’ll see you soon._ ”

            “See you.”

            Kotetsu heard the background of chatter of the bus for a moment before Barnaby ended the call. He slowly lowered his phone from his ear and slid it back into his pocket. He slumped against the couch, concerned his heart would beat right out of his chest.

            “What kind of a request is that?!” Kotetsu sat up quickly, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. That was just too cute, even the way he had asked, as if he was afraid of even posing the question!

            Kotetsu grabbed his now lukewarm fried rice and wolfed it down. There was no way Barnaby would be afraid to ask that, right? Though – Kotetsu coughed as a piece of rice tickled his throat.

            “Ah, there’s just no way...” He pushed away the idea that maybe – just maybe – Barnaby reciprocated his feelings. The very idea was ludicrous. He probably just didn’t want anyone to know he was a professor or something. Kotetsu nodded. It would probably look weird if a professor was out drinking with only one of his students. If the whole class was there, or if there were several students it wouldn’t be as strange then. Right?

            The more Kotetsu thought about it, the more he went around in circles, confusing himself. He didn’t know what Barnaby’s motivations were, but right now they didn’t matter. Tonight was about keeping Barnaby’s mind off of his now ex-boyfriend and making sure he didn’t drink himself into oblivion. Which he probably wouldn’t have done if Kotetsu hadn’t suggested going to a bar. But he digressed.

            Kotetsu tidied up his dishes, setting the dishwasher to run while he was away. He donned his vest, tie and hat again, taking a quick look at himself in the mirror.

            “Why am I worried about this?” he mumbled, turning away from his reflection. With a quick tying of his shoelaces, Kotetsu was out the door.

 

            Leaving his car in his usual spot in the parking lot, Kotetsu entered the bar around seven o’clock. He was pleased to see Barnaby wasn’t there yet, so he took his usual seat at the right-most end of the counter and placed his hat on the stool next to him. The bartender, a man with short-ish blond hair neatly gelled back, waved as Kotetsu sat down. He wore a long black apron over his black slacks and white dress shirt, sleeves rolled up. He finished serving another patron and greeted Kotetsu as he walked over.

            “Kotetsu! Good to see you, and welcome! What can I get for you?”

            “Ah, shochu on the rocks, please. Thanks, Keith.”

            “No problem!” As Keith prepared the drink, he asked, “So, will Antonio be joining you? I see you have a seat saved.”

            “Not Antonio, no. He got called away to a fire.” Keith set Kotetsu’s drink in front of him. He nodded his appreciation and took a sip before continuing. “I’m meeting a...a friend I met at university. His boyfriend broke up with him today, so – ”

            “Ah, a comforting outing. How kind of you!” Keith said, bringing his hands to rest over his heart.

            “Yeah, I guess,” Kotetsu chuckled. “I’m not sure what he drinks, but I hope you have some.”

            “If not, I’m sure I can find something agreeable to him.”

            “Great. Thanks again, Keith.” Kotetsu raised his glass to toast the bartender, who smiled broadly.

            “Always happy to help!” Keith waved as he turned and walked over to the other end of the bar where another customer was waiting. Kotetsu took another drink and rotated around on his stool, so his elbows were resting on the counter.

            Observing the bar, he saw a couple of girls in sparkly dresses at the juke box to the right of the bar, eagerly deciding what song to play. The dance floor beside the machine was otherwise empty. A couple of the booths by the front windows were occupied by groups of four to five young people each. An older couple sat in a booth to his left. Kotetsu recognized a few of the regulars standing at the tall tables scattered around the room, but he’d never spoken to them.

            He checked his watch: 7:06pm; Barnaby would be here soon. Kotetsu took another sip of his drink. The familiar burn of alcohol down his throat calmed his nerves somewhat, but he still glanced nervously at the double door entrance.

Kotetsu turned back to face the bar and directed his attention back to the happenings around him, nursing his drink. The girls at the juke box had selected a ballad and were slow dancing alone on the dance floor. The song wasn’t one he recognized, but the singer’s voice moved his heart as he listened. Taking another sip, Kotetsu allowed his mind to wonder about what slow dancing with Barnaby would be like.

            The bell on the front door sounded, bringing Kotetsu out of his reverie. He turned his head at the sound to see a group of about five people walk in. They all sported outfits of equal sparkliness to the girls on the dance floor and soon joined them. Kotetsu watched absentmindedly as the glittery group all hugged and exchanged pleasantries. Calls of ‘I can’t believe you’re engaged!’ and ‘Congratulations!’ filled the room with a lively chatter.

            Keith was heading over to the group with a bottle of champagne when the bell sounded again. Kotetsu turned lazily towards the door, expecting someone he didn’t know again. His heart leapt when he realized it was Barnaby. His usual red suit jacket had been replaced by a white-and-red leather jacket; his black slacks, fitted grey cargo pants. The red boots he was wearing were similarly eye catching. Kotetsu wondered briefly if Barnaby had gone home to change before waving him over.

            “Hey, P- Barnaby!” _So close._

            Barnaby nodded his acknowledgement, much like he did in class, and headed over. Kotetsu removed his hat from the stool and gestured for Barnaby to sit.

            “Thank you,” Barnaby said, getting comfortable as Kotetsu replaced his hat on his head.

            “Glad you found the place alright!” Kotetsu gestured around them.

            “Yes, it –” A loud pop cut Barnaby off. Looking over at the dance floor, Keith was pouring champagne and handing glasses around to the partiers. Seeing Barnaby’s perplexed expression, Kotetsu explained.

            “Engagement party. Some bridal store is going to be very happy.”

            “Why’s that?” asked Barnaby.

            “Two brides.” Kotetsu laughed before taking another drink. “Oh, the bartender will be over once he’s done with the champagne. Keith has a lot of good stuff; I hope he’ll have something you like.”

            “You come here often?”

            Kotetsu shrugged. “Once a week, if I’m not busy.” He turned his back to the counter, leaning on his elbows. “I just love the atmosphere of it, and Keith has my favourite shochu.” He jiggled the glass so the ice clinked on the sides.

Barnaby smiled. “Thanks for sharing it with me, then.”

            “Aha, there’s no need to thank me.” Kotetsu spun around back to the counter, taking care to face away from Barnaby so he could attempt to control the heat seeping onto his cheeks from his professor’s sincerity. Kotetsu hoped his tan complexion would help hide it, or at least that Barnaby would blame the alcohol, though he hadn’t had much yet. Speaking of... “So, what do you drink?” First round’s on me.”

            “Kote-” Barnaby began to protest but Kotetsu cut him off.

            “No buts, Barnaby! I’m buying your first drink.” Kotetsu smirked at the scowl on Barnaby’s face. As if relenting, Barnaby shook his head, curls bouncing lightly.

            “Okay, but only the first one.” Barnaby said, his frown slowly changing to mirror Kotetsu’s smirk. “And I’m buying your second.”

            “But Ba-”

            “No buts, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby laughed, a clear peal of sound cutting right through to Kotetsu’s heart. He couldn’t help but laugh right along with him. All of the tension and nervousness Kotetsu felt or perceived to feel over this whole situation just melted away. In that moment it was just him and Barnaby, laughing away their troubles.

            Keith approached from behind the bar as their laughter subsided. He greeted Barnaby with a large smile and a handshake.

            “Welcome, friend of Kotetsu’s. What can I get for you?”

            “It’s Barnaby,” he chuckled. “Do you have any rosé wine?”

            Keith’s joyful expression turned to one of thought, a hand coming up to rub at his chin. Kotetsu knew he had a few wines, but rosé was not at the top of his list.

            “I’m not sure, Barnaby-kun,” was Keith’s answer after a few moments. “I’ll have to check. Please give me a few minutes!” He headed to the door behind the bar and disappeared through it.

            Barnaby watched him go, a worried expression on his face. “I hope that wasn’t too much to ask.”

            “You asked for alcohol at a bar, Barnaby. Don’t worry about it!” Kotetsu couldn’t help the snigger that escaped his lips. That earned him a glare.

            “Maybe I should ask for the most expensive drink at this bar instead.” Barnaby’s green eyes flashed with mischief. Kotetsu continued to grin at the younger man and almost said ‘I’d pay for it’ without a hint of a joking tone.

            Luckily for Kotetsu’s sanity and wallet, Keith appeared from behind the bar, holding a bottle filled with light pink liquid. He held in out triumphantly in front of Barnaby, presenting it over his left arm which was draped with a towel.

            “I don’t stock rosé often, but I found this hidden behind the whites. It’s last year’s vintage; I hope it is to your liking?”

            Barnaby inspected the label for a few seconds. “It’s perfect, Keith-san. I’ll have a glass please.”

            “Coming right up, and no problem!” Keith turned to grab a wine glass and set to work opening the bottle.

            Kotetsu leaned over a little. “Guess my wallet’s saved, huh?”

            Barnaby laughed. “I guess so.” Kotetsu smiled. He hoped Barnaby was genuinely enjoying himself and not putting up a front. He was allowed to be sad after all.

            Keith placed a stemless wine glass with a small amount of rosé on the counter in front of Barnaby. Being more of a beer drinker himself, Kotetsu was rather confused and fascinated by the process of wine tasting.  Kotetsu watched as Barnaby swirled then smelled it before finally taking a sip.

            There was something about the way the light from the bar reflected in the wine glass and on Barnaby’s glasses that held Kotetsu’s gaze. He was reminded again just how beautiful the younger man was. As he slowly lowered the glass, Kotetsu found himself entranced by the curve of Barnaby’s lips as he smiled up at the bartender. _Shit_ , he thought absentmindedly. _I want to kiss him._

            Kotetsu saw Barnaby’s lips move, but completely missed whatever it was that Barnaby had said. He must’ve liked the wine because Keith was adding more to the glass. Kotetsu straightened his back, trying to ignore the fact that he had been staring at his professor’s lips. He started a little when Barnaby shifted in his seat so he was facing Kotetsu again.

            “So, should we toast something?” Barnaby asked.

            “Hmm..probably.” Kotetsu thought for a moment then grabbed his glass from the countertop. He swiveled to face Barnaby. “To friends?” he offered. Barnaby squinted at that and countered:

            “To new beginnings.”

            Kotetsu smiled. “That’s a good way to look at it.”

            They clinked their glasses together to complete the toast and each had a drink. Turning back to the bar, Barnaby set his glass down and smiled. Kotetsu followed suit, letting the ambient noise fill the silence between them. The engagement partiers had selected an upbeat song and were dancing around, champagne glasses in hand. Barnaby was looking at them too, slowly taking another drink of wine.

            Kotetsu hoped their enthusiasm would have a positive effect on Barnaby’s mood, instead of a negative one. It occurred to him that he didn’t know where Barnaby and Matt’s relationship had ended, whether they had been close enough to talk about marriage or not. Kotetsu mulled it over in his head. He _did_ need a conversation starter...but it probably wasn’t the best time to ask about that.

            “Kotetsu-san?” Barnaby had turned back to face Kotetsu now. He really hoped he hadn’t been staring.

            “Hmm?”

            “Could you tell me about your days as a firefighter?”

            Kotetsu stopped mid-sip, a big grin spreading across his face. “Sure! What did you want to know?”

            Barnaby shrugged a little. “I didn’t really have anything particular in mind.” He smiled. “Maybe you have a funny story about a cat or something?”

            Kotetsu let out a hearty laugh, causing Barnaby to lean back a little in his chair, eyes wide. “I have several. Would you rather hear the one about the tree or the one about the baby’s bonnet?”

 

            Kotetsu ended up telling both stories, leaving Barnaby in a fit of laughter. He emptied his wine glass during the first story and was working his way through his second. Kotetsu had also just started his second glass of shochu. Which Barnaby had forgotten to mention he was paying for; score one for Kotetsu!

            They chatted idly about Barnaby’s research for a bit when Keith came over and joined their conversation. He found out that Barnaby taught at the university, but it was not mentioned that Kotetsu was taking his class. Keith questioned Barnaby as to whether robotic dogs would become a thing in the near future and seemed rather content after learning that they wouldn’t. Neither mentioned the break up, and Kotetsu wondered whether it was going to be brought up at all. But after Keith finished pouring Barnaby’s third glass of rosé and headed over to the other end of the bar, Barnaby confided.

            “I don’t know what I’d be doing if I was home right now, but I can safely say it wouldn’t be half as fun as this.” Barnaby gave Kotetsu a dazzling smile. Kotetsu returned it in kind and was grateful for the alcohol to blame the ruddy colour of his cheeks on. Seriously, the man was pretty without the addition of alcohol; he practically sparkled now.

            “I’m glad you’re having a good time, Barnaby. I know sitting at home alone like that isn’t that much fun so...” Kotetsu fiddled with his ring before taking a swig of his drink, reflecting on what he’d just said. He glanced at Barnaby, who had gotten this sad, faraway look in his eyes. Kotetsu waited as Barnaby put two and two together.

            “Did you have someone to turn to when...” Barnaby exhaled and looked away. “I’m sorry, that’s too personal a question, isn’t it?”

            Kotetsu shifted his head slightly from side to side. “Maybe, but...I can tell you, if you want.” It was easy to open up at this bar – he’d done it once before with Antonio. And he was pretty sure Keith had been listening in then as well. To tell Barnaby here as well almost felt too easy.

            Barnaby, of course, hesitated. “I don’t want you to look back if it’s too painful.” Kotetsu shook his head at that and met Barnaby’s gaze directly.

            “To move forward, eventually you’ll have to look back on things that have happened in your life. Good and bad.” Kotetsu shrugged. “At least, that’s what I think. Since I know about your personal life, I don’t see why I can’t tell you mine.” He smiled gently and Barnaby’s green eyes filled with apprehension and curiosity. _I don’t mind because it’s you_ , he wanted to say. Instead, Kotetsu waited and watched as a sort of understanding filled Barnaby’s expression. He tucked a curl behind his ear and took a deep breath.

            “Please tell me.”

            Kotetsu nodded and took a drink before setting his almost empty glass quietly on the counter. He turned to Barnaby and began:

            “When Tomoe passed, I felt lost. Like a part of me had broken off and floated away somewhere beyond my reach. I had my family to turn to, but they were feeling the loss as well – Kaede especially. I’d put on a brave face most of the time, but when I was alone, I was a wreck.” Kotetsu clenched his hands into fists and then released them with a sigh.

            “When I went back to my job, everything felt lack-lustre. Even coming home to Kaede – sometimes she’d do something to remind me of her. Not on purpose, of course. It was usually something trivial like the way she spoke, or her expression. Now, I see it as her sort of living on, but back then it was all I could do not to start bawling my eyes out.” Kotetsu chuckled softly in an attempt to push back the tears he felt pricking at the corners of his eyes. But this moment was not the time to be crying for Tomoe.

            “I saw a counsellor. I didn’t think my friends would understand what I was going through, and I didn’t want to burden them with it anyway. It helped a lot to talk about my feelings to an unbiased party.”

            “Is that why you...” Barnaby trailed off, his question unfinished but heard. Kotetsu nodded.

            “It’s one of the reasons I’m studying now, yeah. Also,” Kotetsu took a deep breath. “Just before she died, I made a promise to Tomoe. I promised I’d always do my best to help people in need. So, if I can’t help physically saves lives anymore, I want to know I can mentally help.” Kotetsu smiled and shook his head. “If that makes sense.”

            “It does, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby placed his hand on top of Kotetsu’s, squeezing gently. Kotetsu looked up at Barnaby’s smiling face and nearly started when he saw the tears sliding down his cheeks. Kotetsu felt a little guilty, even though his own tears had snuck past his defenses. He wiped them away.

            “Sorry, Barnaby. I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

            “Eh?” Barnaby sat up a little and wiped at his face in surprise. “I didn’t even notice.”

            Kotetsu bit back a laugh. “That’s good? I guess?”

            “I have no idea.” Barnaby laughed, wiping the last few drops away beneath his eyes. He finished the couple of sips left in his wine glass as Kotetsu finished his drink as well. “I don’t feel quite the same as you. Then again, my situation is different from yours.”

            Kotetsu nodded for him to continue and motioned for Keith to come refill their drinks.

            “I do feel a little lost. It all happened so fast.” Barnaby continued as Keith placed another drink in front of Kotetsu. “I feel – almost betrayed I guess.” He slid his glass to Keith nodding as the bartender gestured with the now almost empty bottle of rosé.

            “Betrayed how?” Kotetsu asked, tilting his head a little.

            “Well...” Barnaby sighed and thanked Keith for the refill. “You know how I’m taking tomorrow off? We were supposed to be going on a weekend trip somewhere.” Barnaby rested his elbow on the counter and leaned his head on his hand. “We planned it weeks ago.”

            Kotetsu’s eyes widened. “You don’t think he – ”

            “Planned it so I’d have an extra day off to deal with it? Yeah I do.” Barnaby sat up and took a big swig of wine. “I’m not about to thank him for being considerate though.”

            Kotetsu laughed into his glass, certain that Barnaby’s voice held more bitterness than most of the bottles behind the bar. He was taking a sip of his shochu when Barnaby whispered, “He purposefully called when you were there too.”

            Kotetsu nearly spat out his drink. He had thought that was the case, but hearing Barnaby admit it was another story. He coughed into the back of his hand before replying. “What?”

            Barnaby took another swig of his wine, facing the bar. Kotetsu leaned over the counter to get a better look at his face, but Barnaby turned away. Kotetsu did notice the flush on his cheeks and wondered if it was entirely from the alcohol or not.

            “Barnaby...” Kotetsu said gently. Barnaby slowly turned on his stool to face Kotetsu again. He opened his mouth and then closed it again, like he was struggling to find the right words to say something. That felt odd to Kotetsu; Barnaby always seemed to have the right words.

            “He...he thought...” Barnaby started to voice his thoughts, his face growing a few shades redder. Kotetsu realized that maybe Barnaby knew what words he needed, he was just struggling to get them out. But what could be so difficult to say? Barnaby took a calming breath. “He thought I was cheating on him...”

            Kotetsu drew a slow breath in. The way Barnaby was staring at him poignantly implied an unsaid ‘with you’ that Kotetsu didn’t miss. He felt his face grow hot at the thought. And it wasn’t just because of the implications of that statement. It was because he probably wouldn’t have minded if it were true.

            “Oh,” was the most intelligible thing he could muster.

            Barnaby turned away again and, after examining his glass for a moment, downed what was left in it. Kotetsu didn’t really blame him.

            The silence between them grew awkward again. The ambient noise of the bar almost seemed muffled, so that they could both clearly hear the other not talking.

            In truth, Kotetsu didn’t know what to say. Should he say something like ‘that’ll never happen’, disregarding his own feelings but maybe putting Barnaby at ease? Or maybe he should admit that he wouldn’t mind if they were an item. But that was liable to push Barnaby away and leave him feeling alone. So he said nothing. Because unlike video games, life didn’t make you choose between two equally undesirable dialogue options.

            Barnaby seemed to be expecting more than just an ‘oh’ though. Kotetsu could feel his eyes on him, but he just kept looking straight ahead at the bottles lining the wall. Kotetsu took a drink and heard Barnaby take in a breath to speak, but Keith came around the bar and interrupted.

            “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were both tomatoes!”

            This time, Kotetsu actually did spit out his drink, spraying the counter and Keith’s shoulder. A quick glance at Barnaby showed he had surpassed the redness of a tomato and had gone full-on strawberry.

            “K-Keith-san!” Barnaby said, getting his breath back. Keith laughed jovially, either not noticing the awkward air or actively trying to dispel it. Knowing him, it was the latter.

            “I kid, I kid!” he waved a hand dismissively. “I came over to see if you’d like the last bit of the rosé, Barnaby-kun.”

            “Oh,” Barnaby quickly looked from Keith to his empty glass and back. “Yes, please.”

            “Wait, you’ve had the whole bottle?” Kotetsu exclaimed. Barnaby gave him a look.

            “I’m fine, Kotetsu-san.”

            Kotetsu exhaled disapprovingly but didn’t say anything further. Barnaby was probably fine, and most assuredly knew his tolerance better than Kotetsu did. Kotetsu reflected again on the fact that inviting him to a bar might not have been the best idea.

            They drank in silence for a little longer, the muffled nature gone since Keith had stopped by to refill their drinks. Kotetsu rubbed at his eyes and checked his watch. It was only 10:30, but he could already feel sleep gnawing at his eyelids. Barnaby looked like he could use a few z’s himself, though his hair was still gloriously perfect. Kotetsu leaned against the bar, chin resting on his hand.

            “I don’t know about you,” he began, “but I’m getting tired. How about we call it a night?”

            Barnaby glanced and the clock and squinted. “It’s only 10:30, Kotetsu-san,” he scoffed.

            “So what?” Kotetsu tried his best to look indignant. “I don’t control when I’m tired.”

            Barnaby snorted, his head lolling dramatically to one side. “That’s because you’re an o-l-d m-a-n.”

            Kotetsu stared incredulously at Barnaby as a teasing grin spread across his professor’s face. He leaned in and waggled his index finger.

            “I may be older than you, but that doesn’t make me an old man!”

            “Yes it does.” Barnaby stated matter-of-factly, straightening up and shaking his head. As Barnaby continued to look down the length of his nose, Kotetsu realized Barnaby was more drunk than he’d let on. Kotetsu decided to counter with some teasing of his own.

            “Geez, Barnaby, from the way you were talking, I thought it would take more than a single bottle of wine to do you in!”

            “It usually does,” Barnaby sighed. “But I didn’t really have dinner so, maybe that’s it.”

            All of the teasing instantly vanished from Kotetsu’s demeanour. “You didn’t eat?!”

            Barnaby shook his head sadly, curls dancing around his face. He raised his glass to take a drink but set it back down when he saw there was nothing left in it. “No appetite.”

            Kotetsu ran a hand through his hair. That would have been a nice thing to know two hours ago! He called to Keith.

            “Can you bring us some pretzels and call a cab to come in fifteen minutes? My friend here didn’t eat dinner.” Barnaby punctuated Kotetsu’s statement by waving lazily at Keith.

            Keith’s eyes widened briefly, but his expression soon returned to its resting position of happy and helpful.

            “Right away. Two cabs or one?”

            “One is fine. I want to make sure he gets home okay.”

            “Certainly.” Keith soon returned with a bowl of pretzels. “Give me a moment to call the cab for you.”

            “Thanks, Keith.” Kotetsu slid the bowl towards Barnaby as Keith moved to use the phone. Barnaby looked at the pretzels then back at Kotetsu; he resembled a lost kitten who had just been given a scrap of meat. Gosh it was cute. Kotetsu didn’t have long to reflect on it though, as Keith soon returned holding a piece of paper.

            “Here is when the cab should be here.” Keith handed the paper to Kotetsu. “If it’s not, the number is also there. Or I can call again.” He smiled broadly. “Anything else I can get you before you leave?”

            “The bill, maybe?” Kotetsu laughed. Barnaby, who had thankfully started to munch on the pretzels, nodded to that as well.

            “Very well!” Keith returned a moment later with their checks and the card machine. They both paid and Keith went to serve another guest.

            “I’m sorry, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby said, softly. Kotetsu looked at him like he had four heads.

            “For what?”

            “For not eating.” Barnaby swayed, considering. “And for not telling you that I hadn’t eaten.”

            Kotetsu shook his head. “Nah, that’s alright,” and before he could think twice about it, Kotetsu reached over and ruffled Barnaby’s hair. Barnaby gave him a confused, indignant look and attempted to swat away his hand without much luck. Kotetsu soon drew it back, only to find it oddly warm and tingly. Barnaby’s hair was really soft, and something about the sensation struck him as rather familiar. Though if Kotetsu could place it in his slightly inebriated state, he would be surprised.

            As they waited for their cab, Barnaby consumed some more pretzels, Kotetsu having a few himself. The glittery group was still jiving on the dance floor, several of them leaning on each other for support. Kotetsu smiled to himself and wondered if he’d have to carry Barnaby on their way out. He didn’t fight back the flush that flooded his face.

            With a minute to go until the cab arrived and the pretzels gone, Kotetsu stood up. Which he immediately regretted. Leaning against the counter to keep his balance and his dignity, he willed his head to stop swimming. Apparently more drunk than he thought he was, Kotetsu wondered if maybe Barnaby would need to carry _him_ out. He chuckled.

            “C’mon, Barnaby.” He offered the younger man his hand. “Cab’s gonna be here soon.”

           Barnaby nodded and took Kotetsu’s hand. Standing on his own two feet, Barnaby was more than a little wobbly at first. He opted for a tighter grip on Kotetsu’s hand instead of grabbing the counter as he steadied himself. Kotetsu instinctively moved a little closer so if need be, Barnaby could lean on him.

            After a few moments, Barnaby relinquished his grip. Kotetsu instantly felt the loss of warmth and nearly pouted.

            “It was a pleasure to meet you, Keith-san!” Barnaby called toward the bar.

            “Thanks for the drinks!” Kotetsu added. Keith waved animatedly at them.

            “Thanks for coming, and thanks again!”

            Outside, the cool autumn air was a welcome treat. It tried to chill Kotetsu but the warmth he was feeling from the alcohol and the closeness of Barnaby practically leaning on him kept it at bay. They walked around to the side of the building, next to the parking lot and stood waiting under the roof overhang, a brick column on either side.

            With a sigh, Barnaby laid his head on Kotetsu’s shoulder. Not expecting the contact, Kotetsu stiffened but relaxed again as Barnaby’s hair tickled his ear.

            “Feeling sleepy?” Kotetsu said teasingly. “Who’s the old man now?”

            “Shut up, old man.” Was the muttered response from Barnaby.

            Kotetsu laughed softly and tried to adjust his shoulder for what he thought would be most comfortable for Barnaby. He didn’t have the chance to ask, however, as the cab’s headlights came into view from the parking lot entrance.

            “Taxi’s here.” Kotetsu whispered, almost afraid to wake Barnaby if he had in fact fallen asleep.

            “Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby mumbled.

            “Hm?”

            “I don’t want to go home tonight.”

            Kotetsu drew a slow breath in as the taxi pulled up beside them. He somehow managed to get a sentence out without stuttering.

            “Okay, there’s lots of room at my place.”

            Barnaby all but nuzzled him as he lifted his head from Kotetsu’s shoulder. Kotetsu could feel his heart pounding in his chest as he helped Barnaby get in the cab. Kotetsu knew Barnaby hadn’t meant that last comment the way his brain had first decided to interpret it, but his heart took it at face value. It didn’t slow down as he made his way to the opposite side of the car, and continued to beat furiously as he gave the driver his address. Kotetsu clicked his seat belt into place and was doing his best to calm down when Barnaby laid his head on his lap.

            So much for trying to be calm.

            The driver must’ve noticed the movement in his back seat, since he turned around. “Is your friend wearing his seat belt?”

            “Uhh,” Kotetsu looked at Barnaby’s situation, trying to ignore the throbbing in his chest and the weight of Barnaby’s head on his thigh. The strap was buckled, but the part that was supposed to be across Barnaby’s chest was lying flat against the seat back. For all intents and purposes, Barnaby was using it like a lap belt. “Yes, but not properly.” Kotetsu answered finally.

            “I’ll be fine.” Barnaby muttered from his position against Kotetsu’s leg. Kotetsu took a steady breath. The cabbie shrugged and started to drive.

            “Suit yourself.”

            Barnaby seemed quite content with his situation, though Kotetsu didn’t think it could be comfortable for him. Yet, it was comforting for Kotetsu to have him there, so close. He ignored the nagging little voice that told him Barnaby was only this affectionate because he was rather inebriated. Besides, it wasn’t anything Kotetsu thought Barnaby would regret doing when he woke up the next morning.

            Kotetsu sighed and tucked an errant curl behind Barnaby’s ear. A sound of contentment escaped the younger man’s lips and Kotetsu was emboldened to continue stroking his flaxen locks. Barnaby didn’t seem to mind. In fact, Kotetsu could’ve sworn he was leaning into his touch. He felt like he was dreaming, but the constant rumble of the taxi kept him grounded. And after a little while, Kotetsu finally managed to place that familiar feeling petting Barnaby’s hair seemed to give him.

            “Just like that bunny.” Kotetsu mumbled. He had nearly forgotten about bunny-Barnaby from Kaede’s school. His soft curly fur felt almost identical to Barnaby’s curly hair.

            “My name’s not Bunny,” Barnaby mumbled back. “It’s Barnaby.”

            Kotetsu chuckled. “I know, Bunny-chan.”

            “Kotetsu-san...!” Barnaby muttered indignantly, rubbing his face against Kotetsu’s leg, looking more like a bunny than before. Kotetsu laughed lightly. He briefly wondered what the cab driver thought of them, and then decided that he didn’t care. Tonight, no one knew they were professor and student; they were just friends. Just friends.

            Friends obviously flirting with each other. Kotetsu didn’t really know what else to call what they were doing just now. And as the driver pulled into the parking lot of Kotetsu’s two-story apartment building, Kotetsu had the urge to lean down and close the distance between their lips.

            His thought process was interrupted by a driver who wanted to get paid and a sleepy Bunny who didn’t want to move. Kotetsu dug his wallet out of his back pocket as best he could without disturbing Barnaby. He gave the driver a hefty tip and coaxed Barnaby into an upright position. As quickly as he could, Kotetsu got out and went around to help Barnaby out. Kotetsu thanked the driver again as he pulled Barnaby’s arm around his shoulders. The cab drove off and the pair turned to face the building.

            “I hope you’re alive enough to climb some stairs, Bunny.” Kotetsu joked.

            “Said the old man with back problems.” Barnaby threw back as they began their ascent.

            “Ouch, Bunny-chan!” Kotestu faux-winced. It was becoming surprisingly easy to use that nickname.

            “Kotetsu-san, why are you calling me ‘Bunny’ all of a sudden?” Barnaby asked rather coherently at the top of the stairs. “I’m not complaining...just wondering.”

            Kotetsu thought for a moment. “Because there’s a bunny named Barnaby. Thus there should be a Barnaby named Bunny.”

            “That makes no sense.”

            Kotetsu laughed and reached for his keys. “Not a lot of things do,” he mumbled. Barnaby hummed on his shoulder.

            Glancing over, Kotetsu saw Barnaby’s eyes were closed. He looked so peaceful, lying on his shoulder, long eyelashes evident on his face. Kotetsu smiled and unlocked the door. He led Barnaby in, slowly unhooking his arm so that he could stand on his own. Kotetsu bent down to unlace his shoes, expecting Barnaby to follow suit, but he made a beeline for the bed.

            “Oy, Bunny, you have to take your –” Barnaby flopped down face first. “ – shoes off.” Kotetsu shook his head and moved to join him.

            “Bunny-chan, your shoes come off at the front door.” Kotetsu admonished. Barnaby shook his head as best he could lying down.

            “Too sleepy.”

            “Well, I’m not.” Kotetsu knelt down and started to undo the laces on Barnaby’s boots. To his surprise, Barnaby let him remove them with little resistance. Looking at his face, Kotetsu could see the restfulness of sleep taking hold. For the third time that night, the idea of kissing him crossed Kotetsu’s mind. He took a deep breath as his heart beat against his ribcage.

            “So, Bunny-chan. Do you sleep with your socks off or on?”

            “Mmm...offon” Barnaby mumbled.

            “Often?” Kotetsu guessed. “Alright, I’ll leave them on.” He stood up, leaving the boots next to the bed. Against his better judgement, Kotetsu brushed a curl away from Barnaby’s face, fingertip gently touching his cheek. “Night, Bunny.”

            Kotetsu turned to walk away but he had only taken one step when he felt something pull on his vest. He looked back and saw Barnaby, now sitting up, holding onto it.

            “Where are you going?” Barnaby asked. Kotetsu sighed and moved in front of him.

            “I’m going to the couch to sleep.”

            “There’s plenty of room here,” Barnaby suggested, squirming. He was so cute, Kotetsu nearly scooped him up into a hug right then and there. Instead, he knelt down in front of him, recognizing the lonely look in his eyes.

            “Barnaby,” he said slowly, “I understand that you’re lonely. And with no one sleeping beside you, you feel it even more.” Barnaby nodded, but Kotetsu continued. “The first night’s always the hardest. But believe me when I say it gets easier. Plus, the bed is a hundred times more comfortable than the couch.”

            Barnaby didn’t say anything but he looked every bit like an abandoned puppy. Kotetsu smiled at him sympathetically and the desire to kiss him washed over him for the fourth time. He couldn’t completely rein it in this time, yearning as he was for some way to comfort Barnaby. As he stood up, Kotetsu placed a hand on Barnaby’s shoulder and kissed him lightly on the forehead. He saw Barnaby’s eyes widen as he pulled away but he didn’t care to interpret why.

            “Good night, Barnaby."

            Kotetsu turned to walk away again but didn’t get one step before Barnaby grabbed him by the wrist. In one fluid motion, Barnaby stood up and whirled Kotetsu around so they were facing each other. Kotetsu barely had any time to react as Barnaby’s hands found his shirt collar and pulled them together. Barnaby managed to get out a breathy, urgent ‘Kotetsu-!’ before their lips met. Kotetsu’s hands hovered in the air around Barnaby as he tried to take it all in. Suddenly, the idea that Barnaby liked him back wasn’t so incredulous but all his brain had was: _Barnaby is – he – lips!_ Kotetsu stopped thinking.

            He brought one hand to Barnaby’s head, cradling it, tangling his fingers in his hair. The other gripped at Barnaby’s waist, pulling him in closer. Barnaby relaxed at the mutual contact and he loosened his grip on Kotetsu’s shirt collar, letting his hands slide down Kotetsu’s chest a little. Barnaby smelled like fresh citrus and alcohol, the former now clearly belonging to whatever he used to style his hair.

           Barnaby’s hands slid up and around Kotetsu’s neck, knocking his hat off. Kotetsu adjusted himself for a better angle and felt Barnaby’s lips part against his own. He licked along Barnaby’s lower lip tentatively, and got a taste of the rosé he had been drinking, bitter and fruity. Kotetsu was still unsure if that was an invitation, so when Barnaby’s tongue darted out to meet his, he eagerly accepted. Their tongues intertwining, Barnaby roughly ran a hand through Kotetsu’s hair, trying to press them closer still. Kotetsu moaned into Barnaby’s mouth and Barnaby returned the noise satisfactorily.

            Barnaby ran his hands down Kotetsu’s chest, stopping at his waist and tugging at his shirt. A switch flipped in Kotetsu’s brain and whether it was reason or madness he didn’t know. When he felt Barnaby’s smooth fingers run over his bare skin, Kotetsu calmly pushed him away ending their kiss.

            Keeping his hands on Barnaby’s shoulders, Kotetsu caught his breath. He could feel Barnaby breathing heavily as well but couldn’t bring himself to look at his face. It didn’t matter what expression he would find there, Kotetsu knew if he saw it, he wouldn’t be able to say what needed to be said. He sighed.

            “I think we should both get some sleep...Professor.” Kotetsu finally looked up and it pained him to see the hurt evident on Barnaby’s face. In truth, Kotetsu didn’t want to stop either. He wanted to drown in Barnaby’s kisses, feel his smooth skin under his fingertips, tousle his beautiful curls. But they were both drunk and Barnaby had been dumped less than twenty-four hours ago. This was something they should deal with in the morning.

            Kotetsu watched an understanding and acceptance grow on Barnaby’s face.

            “You’re right, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby nodded slowly, taking a shaky breath in. “Good night.”

            Kotetsu nodded in kind and removed his hands from Barnaby’s shoulders. A dull ache started in his chest with the loss of contact and only grew as he turned to walk to the couch. He wanted so badly to turn around, to throw himself into Barnaby’s arms again and never leave. But he didn’t.  Instead, Kotetsu steeled himself for sleep and draped a blanket on the couch. He stood beside it for a moment before giving in and chancing a glance behind him.

            Barnaby was lying down on the bed once again, curled up on top of the blankets, his socks off. Kotetsu smiled bittersweetly before laying down on the couch to drift off into sleep himself.

 


	9. ...It's the Getting Back Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait my dear readers! I hope you enjoy this chapter, please leave me a comment if you do! :D

_Barnaby’s eyes widened as Kotetsu’s lips brushed against his forehead. It ended all too quickly and Barnaby only caught a glance of Kotetsu’s gentle smile before he turned to move away. But Barnaby wouldn’t – couldn’t – let it end here, not when they were so close. Not when he had essentially been given an invitation to do what he’d wanted to do all night. He grabbed Kotetsu’s wrist, whirling him around, using the momentum to stand up so they were face to face. Barnaby’s hands found Kotetsu’s shirt collar and latched on, pulling the older man towards him and finally bringing their lips together._

_Barnaby felt Kotetsu stiffen at the contact and for a few tense moments, he thought he had ruined everything. Their friendship, their professional relationship; all of it out the window with a single kiss. Barnaby could feel the tears pricking at his eyes just before a hand was in his hair and Kotetsu started kissing him back. Barnaby’s hands relinquished their grip on Kotetsu’s shirt collar and slid down his chest, feeling the rhythmic thumping of his heart._

_He needed to be closer, to feel that beat against his own and so Barnaby slid his hands back up, wrapping his arms around Kotetsu’s neck. He barely registered the clack of hat brim on floor as Kotetsu pressed closer, his hands gripping Barnaby’s hip and hair tightly. Barnaby sighed contently, his lips parting slightly. He felt Kotetsu’s tongue run along his lower lip and Barnaby eagerly sent his own tongue to meet it. He tasted the alcohol first, before discovering the heady flavour he could only describe as the counterpart to the earthy smell Kotetsu seemed to exude. Barnaby pushed his hand through Kotetsu’s hair, enjoying the scents of cinnamon and earth coming from him. And...was that bacon? Kotetsu smelled like bacon too._

            Barnaby felt his eyelids slowly start to open. He struggled to keep them closed, not wanting to leave that beautiful dream he had been having. But Barnaby could no longer feel Kotetsu’s hands in his hair, or at his hip. All he could smell was bacon. The delicious, treacherous bacon. He groaned and sat up.

            Which was a bad idea. Barnaby groaned louder and clutched as his head, the piercing pain of his hangover making itself known. He opened his eyes to try and get his bearings, but the blurry shapes around him didn’t resemble his own apartment at all. And then one of the further blurry shapes moved which confused him even more. Barnaby squinted at it. He heard it laugh.

            “Your glasses are on the bedside table, Professor.” Strange, the moving blob spoke with Kotetsu’s voice.

_Oh,_ Barnaby thought. _Right, I’m at Kotetsu’s place._ He remembered the night before, not wanting to go home and resting his head on Kotetsu’s shoulder. Barnaby smiled briefly, earning him a dull throb in his forehead. Grumbling, he turned to find the bedside table and his glasses. His hand stopped suddenly, hovering over the indistinct shape of the glasses. _Oh god I was dreaming about him. In his bed. If I said anything..._

            Barnaby glanced over but Kotetsu’s form had disappeared. He assumed behind the wall shaped object that had been to Kotetsu’s left. He sighed and shook his head slightly, finally picking up his glasses.

            The small bedside table came into focus, along with the alarm clock on top of it. A small picture frame stood beside it, displaying a photo of Kotetsu, his daughter and a woman Barnaby could only assume to be Tomoe. Before he could examine it further, Kotetsu appeared at his side holding a glass of water.

            “Here, drink.” Kotetsu held out the glass and Barnaby took it gingerly, taking care to not touch Kotetsu’s fingers, as much as he would like to. “If you need any pain meds or something, I’ve got some in the kitchen.” Kotetsu flashed a quick grin before dashing back to the kitchen, most likely to attend to the now-burning bacon smell. Barnaby stared after him, dazed by that smile as much as his hangover. When Kotetsu went around the corner, Barnaby turned to the glass of water in his hands. He shrugged and took a sip – then drained the whole glass.

            Barnaby rested the empty glass on his leg. Not eating before a night of drinking turned out to be a not-so-good idea. He looked back at the picture frame. Kotetsu’s daughter – Kaede? – was probably about two or three in the photo and had the biggest smile. It resembled the one her father wore, his eyes crinkling at the sides as they still did now. Tomoe’s smile was smaller, but Barnaby could tell she was just as happy. Sighing, Barnaby stood up and pressed the base of his palm into his throbbing forehead. The pain subsided a little eventually, and he made his way to the kitchen.

            Rounding the corner, Barnaby heard Kotetsu humming to himself. The stove top had three pans on it – one full of thankfully not-burnt bacon. The other two held scrambled eggs and pancakes. Barnaby just stood there for a moment, smelling the bacon and kind of wishing he was smelling something else.

            “Hey there,” Kotetsu said, finally noticing his guest. “Sleep well?” Barnaby nodded. “Good.”

           Kotetsu returned has attention to the food and Barnaby’s eyes wandered. Kotetsu’s vest and tie were MIA, his green button up wrinkled and undone at the top. Barnaby had to remind himself not to stare. Instead, he watched Kotetsu try to flip the pancakes. The first went well, but the second landed half outside the pan.

            “Ah – d-d-da,” Kotetsu muttered, hurriedly scraping the half cooked batter back into the pan. Barnaby couldn’t help the little chuckle that escaped his lips. Kotetsu turned and smiled at him tenderly. Barnaby smiled back, savouring the lovely expression until the hissing and popping of the bacon drew Kotetsu’s attention away. Barnaby glared at the greasy meat.

            “I hope you like pancakes.” Kotetsu said, flipping them again. “I was going to make fried rice but I figured you might like a more traditional breakfast.”

            “Pancakes are great.” Barnaby answered, his voice a little hoarse. He cleared his throat before continuing. “But I would’ve enjoyed fried rice as well.”

            “Heh.” Kotetsu brandished his spatula. “Well, I guess I’ll have to make it for you one day.” Barnaby smiled.

            “I’d like that.”

            Kotetsu glanced up from his cooking and turned quickly back to it.

            “W-why don’t you go have a seat, Barnaby. Everything is just about ready.”

            “Do you need any help with an– ”

            “Nope!” Kotetsu interjected. “I’ve got it under control.”

            Barnaby paused and gave a little shrug. “Okay.” He started heading for the dining table when his head throbbed a little. _Oh yeah, hangover._ “Kotetsu-san, where did you say those pain killers were?”

            “Oh, right!” Kotetsu threw his gaze behind him for a moment. He pointed with the spatula. “That cupboard to the left of the sink, bottom shelf.”

“Thanks,”

“And if you need more water, just use the tap. I don’t have any fancy filters or anything!” Kotetsu added. Barnaby laughed softly.

“Alright.” Barnaby found the medicine and shook a couple of tablets out of the bottle. He turned around and watched Kotetsu fidget and fuss over the food. Barnaby felt a silly smile creep onto his face and couldn’t keep it off. He never imagined this scenario even in his wildest dreams – Kotetsu was cooking for him! Barnaby turned the tap on and let it run for a little. He sighed. Speaking of dreams, the most recent one had given him unrealistic expectations. Filling his glass, Barnaby wondered if Kotetsu’s hair was really as coarse as it felt...

            The cool water spilled over the top of the glass onto Barnaby’s hand. He quickly shut the tap off and set the very full glass on the counter. Looking around, Barnaby found a small towel and dried his hand. Gingerly lifting the glass, he drank enough off the top so it wouldn’t slosh out when he carried it. Glancing over as he walked to the table, Barnaby was relieved to note that Kotetsu seemed to be blissfully unaware of the small mishap. Barnaby took the painkillers, then sat down and waited, mentally berating himself for getting distracted so easily. _It was just a dream, Barnaby, nothing like that actually happened. As much as you might want it to..._

            “Here you go!”

            With a clatter, Kotetsu placed a full plate of food on the table in front of Barnaby, ending his inner lecture. Examining the dish, Barnaby could almost not believe what he was seeing. Two pancakes were side by side in the middle of the plate, a little ball of butter in the centre of each. Across the top of the plate in a half circle were the scrambled eggs and curved along the bottom was the bacon. Kotetsu had made his breakfast a face.

            Barnaby bit back a laugh and tried to cover it with his hand – this was simply too much. Kotetsu was too much. The older man just laughed.

            “You can’t fool me, Professor, I know you’re laughing!”

            Barnaby looked up and saw the triumphant smile on Kotetsu’s face, the same one he wore when handing in his assignments. Barnaby shook his head and let out the laughter he had been holding back.

            “You know I’m not grading you on this, right?”

            “Not even a little extra credit?” Kotetsu joked.

            “Maybe not school-wise but, Kotetsu-san,” Barnaby stood up and before Kotetsu could protest, pulled him in for a hug. “Thank you, for everything.”

            Kotetsu spluttered out a few syllables before returning the gesture. “Y-you’re welcome.”

Barnaby nearly shivered at how Kotetsu’s voice sounded so close to his ear, the low rumble an oddly comforting hum. They remained in that close embrace for a few moments more. Longer than Barnaby thought would be appropriate, but since Kotetsu didn’t move to break it he figured it was okay.

            Finally, Barnaby stepped back. He couldn’t help the affectionate smile that ran rampant across his face. Without breaking contact for too long, he placed his hand on Kotetsu’s shoulder and gave a gentle squeeze. Right now, the words he needed to express his gratitude just weren’t there, so he hoped it all came across in this gesture. Kotetsu got noticeably redder and smiled back before turning to his seat.

            Barnaby also found his seat, and couldn’t stop smiling as he ate. He rearranged his plate a bit so he wouldn’t get any syrup on his scrambled eggs or bacon. (He also noticed Kotetsu poured syrup on all three foods and that made him smile _even more_ if that was possible.) They ate in companionable silence; both too busy filling their stomachs to engage in conversation. Barnaby hadn’t really noticed how hungry he was until he’d had that first bite of burnt-on-one-side pancake.

            “If you want any more food, there’s some in the kitchen.” Kotetsu mentioned.

            “Ah, thanks.” Barnaby looked down at his plate to find only one piece of pancake left. “I think I’ll have some more eggs.”

            “Go for it!” Or at least, that was what Kotetsu had tried to say around his mouthful of pancakes. In reality it sounded more like ‘ho fo i’. Barnaby chuckled softly as he helped himself to more eggs and another slice of bacon. When he sat back down, Kotetsu spoke again, this time thankfully with no food in his mouth. “So, did you sleep well last night?”

            “Yes, thank you.” Barnaby nodded. “Sorry for just collapsing on your bed, by the way. As the guest I really should have slept on the couch.”

            Kotetsu shook his head and waved his fork. “No, as the guest, you get the bed. I really don’t mind sleeping on the couch.” He paused to take a drink. “Though you did flop there with your boots on.”

            “Is that why they’re not by the door?” Barnaby laughed.

            Kotetsu nodded. “I hope I unlaced them properly – you certainly weren’t going to do it.” He chuckled.

            Barnaby hid behind his hands for a second. “Was I that bad?”

            “Oh, no, Antonio is much worse!” Kotetsu shook his head, laughing. He met Barnaby’s eyes for a moment and quickly looked away, taking another sip from his glass. Barnaby kept his gaze on him, feeling like there was something Kotetsu wanted to say and just wasn’t. When Kotetsu furrowed his brow, Barnaby’s curiosity got the better of him.

            “Kotetsu-san?” The older man started and looked up at Barnaby. “Is something wrong?”

            “Huh? Oh – no everything’s fine!” Kotetsu waved a hand dismissively. “I was just thinking about how quickly you fell asleep and was wondering if it’s another talent of yours...” He laughed awkwardly, scratching at the back of his neck. Barnaby narrowed his eyes, not convinced that was actually what Kotetsu was thinking about. But he entertained it.

            “I usually don’t fall asleep that fast, actually.”

            “Ah, I see.” Kotetsu looked down at his now empty plate and stood up. “Well, better start cleaning!”

            “Do you need any – ”

            “Nope!”

            Barnaby sighed. _He comes in for help with his homework but won’t let me help with his housework._   He quickly finished the last bites on his plate and brought it over to the sink, setting it next to a stack of pans. Wordlessly, he grabbed the dish towel Kotetsu had thrown over his shoulder and started wiping down the few dishes in the drying rack. Kotetsu turned to protest but Barnaby just looked pointedly at him; his expression a challenge of ‘just try and stop me’. Kotetsu sighed.

            “Thanks, Barnaby.”

            “It’s no trouble, Kotetsu-san.”

            They finished the dishes in silence. That seemed to be a growing trend in their meetings: silence. And it was like a strange sort of equilibrium. Barnaby felt pulled back and forth between the extremes of everything needs to be said and nothing at all need be spoken. The tension that broke early on in their outing last night seemed to be back full force and it was causing Barnaby some grief. Least of all, he would’ve liked to ask Kotetsu where he stored his plates and cutlery since they were now sitting, dry, beside the rack.

            They were friends, right? A little more than Professor and Student to be sure, but nothing that would turn any heads. So why, then, did the air between them feel like it was filled with molasses? A thick, sickly sort of sweet thing?

            Barnaby felt a tug at the towel in his hands, bringing him back to the present. Kotetsu was trying to dry his hands on the part Barnaby didn’t have in a death grip. He quickly let go and apologized.

            “I’m just glad you weren’t holding onto a plate,” Kotetsu teased. “Why don’t you go have a seat on the couch while I put these away?” He pointed to the dishes. Barnaby nodded.

            “Only because I know I’d be no help.”

            “Whatever, Professor!” Kotetsu threw the dish towel back over his shoulder and started putting things away. Barnaby proceeded to the sofa and went back to his thoughts.

            There was obviously something bothering them that made them quiet. Barnaby knew his half: his feelings for Kotetsu. They intruded on his thoughts, looping them back to the dream-handholding, then the _real_ handholding, then back to the recent dream-kiss. He shook his head. He couldn’t bring that up, Kotetsu didn’t think of him that way. Confessing his feelings would more than likely push him away. Barnaby would have to deal with them on his own.

            So then the question remained: what was bothering Kotetsu? Barnaby had already done the obvious thing and asked, but he’d gotten the ‘everything’s fine’ response when clearly it wasn’t. What could possibly have happened between last night and this morning that – Barnaby froze. Did he do something last night he didn’t remember? Something that might’ve made Kotetsu feel awkward? If so, Barnaby was amazed. Kotetsu had cooked breakfast for him, in the shape of a face no less.

            Just to be sure, Barnaby focused on remembering the events of last night, looking for anything incriminating. Things had been pretty normal for a friends’ night out until Barnaby had asked Kotetsu to talk about his wife. They had a tender moment then, followed soon by a tomato moment. But Kotetsu had seemed fine after both of those. Barnaby remembered getting a little closer after that. He’d laid his head on Kotetsu’s shoulder before the cab ride, on his legs during the cab ride...was that it? But after thinking about it some more, Barnaby recalled a hand gently stroking his hair. Was – was the thing bothering Kotetsu –

            “Hey, Barnaby,” Kotetsu appeared over the back of the couch, startling Barnaby out of his musing. “Ah, sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you!” Kotetsu smiled and Barnaby’s tongue tied itself in knots. He shook his head to show it was no problem and waited for Kotetsu to continue. “Um,” Kotetsu scratched the back of his neck. “Want to head back to the bar with me to pick up my car? I can drive you home afterward.”

            Barnaby swallowed and nodded, the knots thankfully coming undone. “A ride back would be great.”

            Kotetsu was already wearing his vest and tie again. Barnaby didn’t know why he always dressed like that, but he thanked whatever the reason was. He grabbed his boots from the foot of Kotetsu’s bed and they tied their shoes in unison. Kotetsu procured his hat from somewhere and out the door they went. Before Barnaby could inquire as to how they were getting to the bar, a cab pulled into the parking lot. The drive over seemed a bit longer than last time, but maybe that’s because time goes by faster when you’re practically throwing your inebriated self at your student and friend. Barnaby didn’t regret that though.

            When they arrived, Barnaby insisted on paying the fare since Kotetsu had done so last night. The older man probably would have protested more if Barnaby hadn’t already paid the driver with an impressive smirk on his face. Heading over to the parked green SUV, Kotetsu dug out his keys and unlocked it. Barnaby moved to the passenger side and opened the door – causing an empty water bottle to clatter onto the pavement.

            “Dah!” Kotetsu said from the other side of the car. “Sorry, I forgot how messy this was.” Barnaby picked up the bottle that had fallen out and tossed it in the backseat as Kotetsu did the same for several others.

            “Don’t worry about it, Kotetsu-san. You didn’t know you’d have a guest here.”

            Kotetsu huffed a laugh. “Yeah, but I really should keep it clean regardless.”

            “I can’t argue with that logic,” Barnaby teased as he slid into the passenger seat, jostling a loose paper with his feet. Kotetsu finished tucking some napkins into the glove compartment and buckled his seatbelt.

            “So, where do you live?”

            “It’s an apartment building just outside downtown.” Barnaby gave the address and clicked his seatbelt in as well. Kotetsu nodded.

            “I vaguely know where that is.”

            “I can direct you once we get close, if you want.”

            “Great, because I’m not good with the GPS.” Kotetsu started the car and Barnaby started imagining Kotetsu yelling at the GPS because it kept recalculating. The thought kept him amused on the way over, but he made sure to give directions well in advance. They made good time, and soon enough Kotetsu was pulling up to the front of the building.

            “Here we are, Mr. Brooks,” Kotetsu said in a horrendous British accent, making a slight bowing motion. Barnaby muffled a laugh into the back of his hand.

            “Thank you, Kotetsu-san.”

            Kotetsu chuckled and returned to his normal voice. “Any time, Bunny-chan.”

            Barnaby had been halfway out of the car but he stopped and slid back onto the seat.

            “I’m sorry, what?”

            “Eh, ah – Bunny! It’s – it’s the nickname I gave you last night.” Kotetsu’s cheeks darkened and he awkwardly laughed, looking anywhere but at Barnaby.

            “No wonder I forgot.” Barnaby stepped out of the car. “It’s terrible.”

            “Bunnyyyy!” Kotetsu whined. Barnaby laughed and closed the door behind him. He turned around and Kotetsu opened the window.

            “Just don’t call me that at the university.”

            “Don’t worry, Professor! If I slip up, I can always blame it on the bunny named Barnaby.” Kotetsu offered. Barnaby found the sentence familiar, but instead of questioning its origins, he shook his head and said:

            “I’ll see you in lecture Monday?”

            Kotetsu nodded quickly. “Sure thing.”

            “Have a safe drive home, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby waved and Kotetsu followed suit.

            “Bye, Bunny!” With a smile that could kill, Kotetsu rolled up the window and drove away. Barnaby stared after him for a moment before sighing and heading into the building. He waved at the security guard as he passed and got into the waiting elevator. Barnaby dug out his keys as the floors dinged by two, three, four, before stopping at five. He quickly walked over to his door and fluidly unlocked it with a practiced motion. Once inside, he leaned against the door to close it and only then did his heart start beating furiously.

            He remembered the nickname now, the memory coming out of the woodwork of last night. It was during the cab ride home, Barnaby resting his head on Kotetsu’s thigh, Kotetsu petting his hair. The explanation about bunny-Barnaby came on their way up the stairs, both of them leaning against the other for support. Barnaby ran a hand through his hair, now recalling falling onto Kotetsu’s bed. The instant scent rush of cinnamon and Kotetsu, distracting enough that he hadn’t noticed the pain of his glasses digging into his face. The accidental brush of Kotetsu’s fingers on his foot as he undid the second boot.

            Barnaby sighed deeply and pushed off the door with his shoulders, rolling them as he walked to his kitchen island. He forced himself to think of something else, not willing to let his imagination bridge reality and dream. No matter how plausible it seemed.

            He absentmindedly tossed his keys in their usual resting place on the island. But the usual clacking of keys on granite seemed strangely muffled and Barnaby turned to examine them. A white paper square sat under them.

            “What is...” Barnaby reached for the paper but stopped his hand in midair. Vague memories of a phone call he’d rather forget surfaced and Barnaby recalled that the last person to have been in his apartment wasn’t him. Barnaby took a deep breath and pulled the paper out from underneath his keys.

            His name was carefully written in Matt’s handwriting on what turned out to be an envelope. Barnaby took a steadying breath. He was unsure whether or not he was ready to read whatever this envelope contained. But then again, he hadn’t been ready for any of this. He flipped open the tucked in flap and removed the single piece of paper that was inside. He unfolded it slowly and read:

            _Barnaby,_

_I’d like to apologize for the suddenness of my termination of our relationship._

            Barnaby rolled his eyes.

            _I understand you not wanting to see me, and I’m sorry for not trusting you. I wish you all the best._

_Matt-_

_P.S. I’m sure you’ve deleted my number already, but if you need anything it’s_

            Barnaby took his phone out and promptly deleted Matt’s number from his contact list. He could tell from the letter that Matt had definitely been waiting for him to get home. Probably just to apologize like in the letter but odds were things would’ve gotten heated. Barnaby shook his head and tucked the letter back in the envelope, finally stashing it in a drawer under all the appliance owner’s manuals he had. In the event he _did_ need anything, it would be silly not to have it.

            Sighing loudly, Barnaby unzipped his jacket and unlaced his boots, leaving both by the front door. He moved over to his couch, turning on the news before settling down on the soft, grey microfibre. He tried to pay attention to the headlines, but as they had all morning, his thoughts drifted back to his student.

            “Kotetsu...” Barnaby omitted the honorific on purpose, enjoying how the name rolled off his tongue. He leaned back, resting a hand behind his head, letting his fingers intertwine with his hair. The sensation had a certain familiarity to it, one of a not so distant memory. But – _No, that was the dream_.

            Except now the dream was blending with reality, meshing together with the events Barnaby knew happened so flawlessly that maybe – just maybe – it had actually happened. He sat forward on the couch. _But, if that’s the case..._ Why didn’t Kotetsu say anything? Did he not remember? Granted, Barnaby wasn’t entirely sure if _he_ remembered, or if he was just over-thinking this to the point of lunacy. But he’d had other dreams before, and none of them had stuck like this. Like a memory.

            Barnaby sighed and laid down on the couch. It didn’t matter either way, he realized. He would continue to treat Kotetsu as a student and friend; nothing more and nothing less. That was just the way it had to be.

            “Why did I agree to tutor that silly old man?” Barnaby asked no one, more fondness in his voice than anything else. He smirked and a small laugh escaped his lips. He wasn’t surprised when the tears came. They felt almost therapeutic as he let them run down his face.

            He would take this weekend to heal. To patch his heart back up so he could continue on, not worrying about what could have or should have been. But the hardest part, Barnaby concluded, would be picking up the scattered files of his feelings and locking them back inside the cabinet that housed them before.

 


	10. Not the Best Two Weeks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wowie, an update! Sorry this took a while, but I wasn't sure this chapter was gonna stick around until I wrote the next one. Which is good news for you, dear reader, because that means this is a Double Update!!! I hope you enjoy!

            A couple blocks away from Barnaby’s apartment, Kotetsu pulled into a coffee shop parking lot, found a spot in the back and turned off his engine. He laid his arms across the steering wheel and promptly placed his forehead on them. Why could he never say what needed to be said? Granted, it would have been weird for him to bring it up if Barnaby didn’t remember. And it kind of seemed like he didn’t.

            “Maybe it’s better this way,” he mumbled. But he knew it wasn’t. He could try and go on as he normally did, but he could never forget that kiss. The electricity they shared last night had been, well, wonderful. Kotetsu needed to know if Barnaby remembered, needed to know if he felt that spark. “Thursday... I’ll talk to him Thursday,” he muttered into the steering wheel.

 

            Kotetsu was dreading his Thursday tutorial. Monday’s lecture had gone well enough: a small wave, a nod, a perceived smile. Barnaby had looked okay then, so that eased his worry a little. On Tuesday, he’d spent some time working on his robotics assignment, and then Wednesday’s lecture had gone much the same as Monday’s. But now it was Wednesday evening, and Kotetsu had spent the better part of it worrying about the ‘what ifs’ of tomorrow.

            What if Barnaby had remembered since they’d talked last and he was angry at Kotetsu for not bringing it up? What if Kotetsu called him Bunny within ear shot of the Dean? What if Barnaby _didn’t_ remember? What if he slipped on the stairs on the way up and broke his nose? What if what if what if! Kotetsu’s nervousness and apprehension grew until he felt like it would swallow him whole.

            The ringing of his phone startled him out of his internal worry pit. He glanced at the call display as he picked up the phone and smiled.

            “Kaede~”

            “ _DadcanyoupleasecometomyskatingrecitaltomorrowIknowyou’rebusybutthere’sgoingtobeascouttherepleaseDad –_ ”

            “Slow down, Kaede! Papa can’t understand what you’re saying.” Kotetsu heard his daughter take a deep breath and slowly let it out.

            “ _I have a skating recital tomorrow and I wasn’t going to invite you since I know you’re busy with school but”_ She took another deep breath. “ _I’m getting nervous because a scout from the skating club I want to join is going to be there so – do you have time to come watch me tomorrow?”_

            “Tomorrow?” Kotetsu pursed his lips. “What time?”

            “ _Six o’clock._ ”

            Kotetsu hummed. He couldn’t go to the tutorial _and_ Kaede’s recital...but this assignment wasn’t due until after the next tutorial. And Barnaby would surely understand if he needed to be there for his daughter...

            “Yeah, I should be able to make it!”

            “ _Really? Oh, thank you, Dad!”_

            “I can’t wait to see how cute you are!”

            “ _Daaaad_.”

            “I’ll meet you at the house okay? Around five?”

            “ _Okay. Thanks again, Dad!”_

            “You’re welcome. I love you!”

            “... _Love you too, Dad._ ”

            The call ended with a click. Kotetsu sighed and leaned back against his couch. The knot that had been forming in his stomach had lessened now, but it was still there. He typed out a quick text to Barnaby, letting him know he couldn’t make tomorrow’s tutorial. Using his daughter as a quasi-excuse to get out of it didn’t sit quite right with Kotetsu, but it meant he had more time. Time to figure out how he’d approach the subject. Time to decide if he really _wanted_ to approach the subject. Time to breathe.

 

            Kotetsu arrived late to lecture the Friday morning. He’d accidentally slept in and had driven back from home as fast as he would allow himself. His usual spot nearish to the front was taken so he sat further back. Far enough back that he couldn’t properly see Barnaby. There was no wave, no nod, just his voice over the speakers. But it was different from the softer, tipsy voice he’d heard the last time they were together. Kotetsu could almost believe it wasn’t him.

            At least, that’s what he told himself.

            The next two lectures came and went, Kotetsu sitting in the back, pretending everything was fine. Only when he was working on the assignment did he know everything was not fine. He’d gotten stuck on nearly every question, and thinking about getting help just made him think about Barnaby. And how terrible he was being, avoiding him like this. He needed to go to that tutorial.

            But Thursday came, and at the end of his psychology lecture, Kotetsu turned away from the robotics building. He headed straight for his car, firing off a text to his professor about essays and second midterms and needing the time. Guilt formed a lump in his throat that only increased in size at the return ‘Let me know if you need help with anything’ text.

            Why was he even doing this to himself? Why couldn’t he just act normal? Act like there was nothing...nothing extra between them.

            But there _was_ something extra between them. And Kotetsu didn’t want to ignore it. Only in trying not to ignore it, he had ignored Barnaby and his feelings. And now it seemed too late to undo all of that. The whole thing was just frustrating!

            Kotetsu ruffled his hair and drove home.

           

            The next day, Kotetsu tried to hand his assignment in himself. He made his way down the lecture hall stairs, heart beating a million miles a minute. But as soon as he got close enough to see Barnaby’s smiling face, he panicked. Kotetsu was afraid he’d blurt everything out right there, with Barnaby surrounded by throes of eagerly listening students. He just couldn’t risk that happening – not for himself and definitely not for Barnaby.

            Instead, he asked a passing student if they could hand in his assignment for him and left.

            And now it was Monday. A weekend of self-loathing and drinking had done nothing to improve Kotetsu’s mood. And hearing that the assignments were marked and ready to be picked up at the front didn’t help either. He couldn’t just ask someone to grab his assignment this time. He’d have to go up there himself. And while Professor Barnaby would likely be surrounded by students like usual, he would still see Kotetsu there. He would know.

            Not to mention, Barnaby had already seen the assignment and Kotetsu was sure he’d done pretty shittily on it in comparison to his others. Barnaby would not be pleased. Kotetsu took a deep breath and headed to the front to face his fate.

            He rifled through the H-K assignment pile twice. Students said names over his shoulder and he pulled them out obligingly when he found them or knew he had passed them. His wasn’t there. Kotetsu started on the D-G pile next, since no one was currently looking through it. He doubted Barnaby would have misplaced it, but he had to be sure...not there either.

            The L-M pile was Kotetsu’s next target. Nothing. He moved onto the N-P pile and came up empty on his name again. Kotetsu was just about to start the Q-T pile when a familiar voice called out to him.

            “Is there a problem?” Professor Barnaby asked from the other side of the desk. Kotetsu swallowed nervously.

            “Uh, yeah,” _I think I’m in love with you._ “I can’t seem to find my assignment.”

            “I see. Maybe I misplaced it.” The smile Barnaby gave was cold and calculating. Kotetsu shivered involuntarily. “I’ll help you look for it.”

            After five minutes of rooting through piles, students claiming assignments and asking questions, they were left with fifty or so papers. None of them were Kotetsu’s.

            “Hmm, I might have left it in my office by mistake.” Barnaby said, in a tone that made Kotetsu think it was entirely _not_ by mistake. “Do you have time to come up with me and see?”

            Kotetsu just nodded, not trusting his voice at present.

            “Alright, just give me a few moments to pack up.”

            Kotetsu nodded again and stepped back, waiting awkwardly by the edge of the table that held the assignments. He watched Barnaby gather the papers up, curls bouncing neatly around his face as he walked. Kotetsu’s heart lodged itself painfully in his throat at Barnaby’s obviously not happy smile. The corners of his mouth were turned up but his eyes held a vaguely concealed intensity that told Kotetsu Barnaby was more than not pleased with him – he was angry. Kotetsu cringed at the earful he knew he was going to get when they were alone.

            But he knew he deserved it.

            They made their way to Barnaby’s office in silence. A tense silence like they’d never had before. Kotetsu couldn’t blame Barnaby being angry; Kotetsu had been a terrible friend. Inside his office, Barnaby placed his bag next to his desk and slowly began going through his papers. Kotetsu fiddled with his hat and drummed his fingers on his satchel’s strap, his heart beat quickening.

            “Ah, here it is,” Barnaby’s voice called, annoyance slowly trickling through, “Kotetsu T. Kaburagi.” He held the paper out and Kotetsu reached to take it. Barnaby snatched it upwards, holding it over his head. Kotetsu took a small step back as Barnaby leaned forwards and interrogated him: “Why have you been avoiding me?”

            This close, Kotetsu could see the thinly veiled fury burning in Barnaby’s green eyes. He stuttered, not really sure what to say. Not really sure where to start. Barnaby continued.

            “After everything – everything we’ve shared...why?” He paused and Kotetsu remained silent. All of the words he wanted to say were piling on top of each other in his brain and his mouth just couldn’t process them all. He tilted his head down, hiding behind the brim of his hat, guilt and shame burning at his cheeks. Barnaby slowly lowered the assignment until his arm hung loosely by his side. Kotetsu didn’t reach for the paper.

            “Did I – ” Barnaby’s breath hitched. “Was it something I did?” Kotetsu’s head snapped up and Barnaby’s eyed widened. “It was...I – I did something you didn’t like and – and now – ” Barnaby’s breath hitched again and Kotetsu finally realized he was trying not to cry. Kotetsu just couldn’t take it – being this close and seeing Barnaby like this, knowing he was the one causing it. He had to set the record straight, clear up this whole thing. He needed to say something. Kotetsu dropped his satchel to the floor and pulled Barnaby into an embrace.

            “You’ve got it all wrong, Bunny.”

            “Eh?”

            Kotetsu felt Barnaby tense in his arms and then relax with a breath in his ear. Kotetsu stepped back slightly and moved his hands to Barnaby’s face. He rested one along either side and wiped away the tears there with his thumbs. Kotetsu met Barnaby’s confused gaze directly.

            “Bunny, I – ”

            “Hello, Handsome!” The door opened with a loud clack and Kotetsu dropped his arms immediately. He darted to the floor and grabbed his satchel, dodging the pink figure who had just opened the door. Without so much as a glance back, he scurried out the door.

            In a blind panic, Kotetsu went right instead of left towards the stairs and ended up running down a long hallway. He ignored the looks the one other person in the hallway was giving him and hustled down the first flight of opposite stairs. At the bottom, he missed a step and nearly fell face first into the floor. Kotetsu managed to turn around so his butt took the hit instead of his nose, but his satchel went flying.

            “Owwwww,” Kotetsu groaned, gingerly standing up and gently rubbing at his surely bruised tailbone. He bent down and picked up his satchel and then reached up to adjust his hat.

            Only he felt hair instead of hat.

            Kotetsu looked around but couldn’t find it. Perplexed as to where it could’ve gone, he walked down the next flight to see if it had miraculously fallen down there. No dice. He scratched at his beard and looked back up the stairs. Where could it –

            “Shit.”

 

***

 

            Nathan picked up Kotetsu’s hat from the floor and held it out.

            “Sorry, Handsome, did I interrupt something?”

            Barnaby wordlessly took the hat, mouth opening and closing but not saying anything. Had Kotetsu really been here? It all seemed so fantastical to recall.

            “Barnaby-kun?”

            Barnaby’s head shot up. “Sorry, Nathan.”

            “I don’t need an apology,” Nathan said, shutting the door behind him. “But are you okay? Who was that?”

            “I – he – ” Barnaby pursed his lips and turned Kotetsu’s hat around in his hands. He sighed. “It’s probably easier if I just start from the beginning. Or, rather, close to the beginning. You already know the first part.”

            Nathan tilted his head to the side, a confused expression on his face. After a moment, his eyes widened in realization. “Oh, Handsome.”

            “I know.” Barnaby groaned and ran a hand through his hair. “And I do need to apologize. I..didn’t exactly tell you the whole story with Matt.”

            “It did feel like you were leaving something out.” Nathan lightly shook his head. “Well, I’m all ears, Barnaby-kun.” Nathan smiled and took a seat. Barnaby leaned against his desk next to Nathan and launched into the story.

            Nathan was silent for the most part, but his facial expression changed rapidly during Barnaby’s telling. Surprised and confused at Kotetsu being there for the break-up. Slightly smiling for the offered comfort afterward. Intrigued by the trip to the bar. Leaning forward and smiling grandly at the happenings at the bar. His expression became distant as Barnaby spoke of the ride home and what he thought happened at Kotetsu’s place. But Nathan snapped back to reality when Barnaby revealed Kotetsu had essentially been ignoring him for two weeks.

            “...and just now I was yelling at him because I hadn’t seen him and his assignment grade dropped twenty percent. Then he suddenly hugged me and I think he was going to say something important when you came in but I don’t know.” Barnaby took an exasperated breath. “Nathan, I just don’t know.”

            Nathan slowly nodded, hand under his chin. “You have quite the situation there, Handsome.”

            “Tell me about it.” Barnaby rubbed his thumb gently on the fabric of the hat in his hands.

            “So, what do you intend to do?” Nathan looked pointedly at him.

            “Do?” Barnaby asked, confused.

            “Yes, Barnaby-kun. I’m asking what _you_ want.”

            Barnaby inhaled slowly. What _did_ he want? For things to go back to the way they were? Well, yes and no. He wanted to see Kotetsu again, to be friends with him again – not that they had annulled their friendship but Barnaby disgressed.

            “I...want to be true to my feelings.” Barnaby stated. “It’s obvious to me now that I care about this man and I want to see where it goes.”

            “Handsome-!”

            “But I also know the situation is tough. And I don’t want to push him. I want Kotetsu-san to come back on his own terms.”

            Nathan gave him a concerned look. “I’m glad you know it’s not going to be easy...but if he does return your feelings, you’re both going to need to be careful. Your situation is...special, since he is older but I doubt the Dean will be happy if she learns about it.” Barnaby smiled.

            “I know, Nathan. If I can, I’d like to wait until the semester’s over to go that far. At least then there’s some separation?”

            “Hmmmm,” Nathan hummed and stood up. He patted Barnaby on the shoulder. “Well, you seem to have decided so...” Nathan shrugged. “Good luck, Handsome! And don’t you worry. Your secret is safe with me.” He winked. Barnaby laughed.

            “Thank you, Nathan. And thanks for listening. I know that’s not what you came here to do.”

            “Oh, right!” Nathan pointed upwards. “I wanted to know if you wanted to go drinking tonight.” He half shrugged. “I suppose the answer is ‘no’?” Barnaby nodded.

            “Sorry.”

            “No, no, it’s alright! You just let me know when you’re available.” Nathan waved a manicured hand and sashayed over to the door. “If things work out with your man, be sure to invite him too.” He winked. Barnaby rolled his eyes.

            “Bye, Nathan.”

            “See you later!”

            The door shut with a clack behind him. Barnaby sighed and examined Kotetsu’s hat once more. He brought it to his chest and gave it a little hug.

            “What were you going to say?”


	11. Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double Update! If you haven't read chapter 10 yet, head on back :)

            Kotetsu had taken up a seat in the hall just outside Barnaby’s office. The convenient little nook had a decent sized desk facing the wall and felt sort of like a small cubicle. Kotetsu had strewn his notes around the desk to make it seem like he was working, but in reality he was lost in thought about his recent interaction with a certain professor.

            He rolled his pencil around in his fingers, trying not to think about how he had almost confessed his feelings right then and there. Kotetsu just couldn’t stand seeing Barnaby so broken up about...well...him. He scratched at the back of his head. What would he say when he went back? He couldn’t really continue what he was going to say...well, he could but what a can of worms that would be.

            Although...Barnaby was a smart man – he might have figured out what Kotetsu was going to say. And if so, then what? What next? What... _What does he think of me?_

            A door clicked open behind Kotetsu, and he turned slightly to try and catch a glimpse of movement in his peripheries. He saw pink and froze. The clack of heels on tile got slowly closer until a voice whispered to him:

            “Barnaby’s waiting for you.”

            Kotetsu took a deep breath and turned to face the person who had interrupted earlier, chair squeaking on the floor. He was greeted with a smile, a wink and another whisper:

            “Go get him, tiger!”

            Kotetsu felt his face flush a little as he opened his mouth to respond but his encourager was already walking away and they rounded the corner before he could say anything. Kotetsu swallowed and looked over to Barnaby’s door. If it was true that Barnaby was waiting for him, things couldn’t be as bad as he thought...right? Kotetsu sighed, quickly gathered up his stuff and turned back to face the office door. He crossed over to it and knocked softly.

            Instead of the usual ‘come in’, the door slowly opened inward, creaking softly. A rather vulnerable looking Barnaby met Kotetsu’s gaze; it seemed a thousand questions danced behind his eyes. Kotetsu glanced away quickly before meeting Barnaby’s eyes again. Finally, Barnaby stepped back and let Kotetsu into his office.

            Kotetsu headed towards his usual seat by the desk, placing his satchel on the left chair. Barnaby shut the door with a soft clack, facing away from his student. His hand remained on the door knob for a few seconds more before he turned around.

            “I suppose you came for this?” Barnaby held up Kotetsu’s hat. Kotetsu instinctively reached up to touch his head, even though he knew his hat wasn’t there. He ran his hand through his hair and half shrugged.

            “Yes, but mostly – ” he inhaled, “I came to apologize.”

            Barnaby blinked, his mouth slightly open. Kotetsu reminded himself to focus, determined to not be distracted by that adorable expression. He continued:

            “At first, I wasn’t avoiding you on purpose. Things just came up that made it easy. But, afterwards, avoiding you meant avoiding my feelings and, well,” Kotetsu shrugged, “I’ve been known to avoid those.” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair again. “What I mean to say is, I’m sorry, Bunny. You didn’t deserve that.”

            “Kotetsu-san...”

            Kotetsu gave a small little smile and walked the two steps he needed to, to be closer to Barnaby. He held his professor’s searching gaze and apologized once more.

            “I’m sorry, Bunny. And – ” Kotetsu glanced down and took Barnaby’s left hand in his right. “I missed you.”

            “Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby’s eyes lit up with trepidation, but his tone sounded hopeful.

            “I can’t say anything more than that.” Kotetsu concluded.

            Barnaby slowly nodded and an understanding flashed in his emerald eyes. He weaved his fingers with Kotetsu’s and squeezed gently. Kotetsu returned the gesture and smiled at Barnaby. The smile he got back was one of the most beautiful sights Kotetsu had ever seen.

            “I’ll forgive you on two conditions.” Barnaby said, still smiling a little. Kotetsu raised an eyebrow.

            “And those are?”

            “One: Stop avoiding me and come to class and your tutorial.”

            “Can do. Though I’d like to state for the record that I never skipped class.”

            Barnaby’s eyes widened, then narrowed in confusion. But he shook his head and continued.

            “Two,” he walked around Kotetsu to his desk without letting go of his hand, thus effectively turning him around. “Apologize for this mess of an assignment.” Barnaby held the offending paper up. Kotetsu winced.

            “I’m sorry. I should’ve asked you for help.”

            Barnaby nodded satisfactorily. He placed the assignment back on his desk and paused. “I have one more condition, actually.”

            “You said two – ”

            “Now I’m saying three.” Barnaby smiled mischievously. Kotetsu sighed and nodded.

            “Alright, what is it?”

            “After the final grades are up for this course, you have to come and see me. Tell me everything.” Barnaby squeezed Kotetsu’s hand again. Kotetsu ran his thumb lightly along Barnaby’s.

            “I will.”

            Barnaby smiled again and Kotetsu’s heart soared. But he knew they couldn’t stay standing like this forever. He reached to grab his satchel without dropping Barnaby’s hand and slung it onto his shoulder.

            “I guess you’ve got to go, huh?” Barnaby asked.

            “Unfortunately.” Kotetsu replied. He inhaled slightly and in a moment of sheer self indulgence, Kotetsu stepped forward, took hold of his hat, and placed a soft kiss on Barnaby’s cheek. “See you, Bunny-chan.”

            With that, he let go of Barnaby’s hand, leaving its stunned owner in his office.

 

***

 

            Barnaby sat anxiously in his office, eyes watching the clock. There were still ten minutes before Kotetsu was supposed to arrive for his tutorial, but Barnaby couldn’t help but hope he’d show up early. After their little chat last week, things had gone back to normal, more or less. His lectures again started with a wave from the old man and a nod from himself. Only the wave now started his heart pounding in a way it hadn’t before, now that he ‘knew’ about Kotetsu’s feelings.

            To that extent, he wasn’t entirely sure how this tutorial would go. Would they just ignore their attraction to each other and focus on the work? Would they flinch away from an accidental brush of fingers? Would one of them snap? The whole restricting yourself from something tended to have the opposite of the desired effect.

            Barnaby shook his head. It didn’t have to be any different from how it was before. The tutorial was for helping Kotetsu with his coursework. And that’s what he, the professor, would do. Barnaby the person would have to wait.

            A knock at the door signaled Kotetsu’s arrival. Barnaby called for him to come in as he glanced at the clock: 1:54.

            “Hiya, B-uh – Professor!” Kotetsu said as he entered.

            “Good afternoon, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby returned as the door clicked shut behind his student. “I see the nickname hasn’t gone away yet.”

            “Sorry, it just fits you so well!” Kotetsu said sheepishly, shrugging his satchel into the left chair. Barnaby narrowed his eyes and tilted his head to the side.

            “How so?”

            Kotetsu sat down in the right chair and blinked.

            “Well, that expression right now, for one.”

            Barnaby blinked and straightened his neck and glasses, flashing a skeptical look at Kotetsu. The older man laughed softly.

            “It kind of sounds like your name too! Bunny, Barnaby.” Kotetsu held his hands up as if to weigh the two options against each other. He paused and a concerned look crossed his face. “You don’t mind, do you?”

            Barnaby paused for a moment before his expression dissolved into an easy smile.

            “No, I don’t mind.”

            Barnaby saw Kotetsu’s cheeks redden slightly and felt his own face warm as well. An easy, comfortable feeling flowed through him, easing the tension in his stomach. This was what he had missed. This natural feeling of ...companionship? Camaraderie? Barnaby couldn’t quite give it an accurate name. All he knew was it felt right.

            Kotetsu coughed and Barnaby realized he’d been staring. He coughed as well, covering his mouth and schooling his features into something remotely professional.

            “Right. So. Questions.” Barnaby said. Kotetsu did his best not to laugh.

            “Yes. Questions.” Kotetsu dug through his satchel and produced a sheaf of papers. “Can we go over what I didn’t get on the last assignment first? I have a feeling some of my questions about the current one will be answered that way.”

            “Of course.” Barnaby rolled his chair closer to the desk. “Let’s start with question four.”

            They worked on problems together for a good hour and a half, catching up on lost time. It wasn’t as hard to focus as Barnaby thought it would be, but he did catch himself staring again a couple of times.

            The first, he was watching Kotetsu’s hands as he worked though a problem. His left drummed on top of the desk, light glinting off his wedding ring. His right scratched away with the pencil, fingers flexing as he worked at the problem. Then Kotetsu asked him another question, distracting Barnaby before he could imagine those hands other places.

            The second time, Barnaby was looking at Kotetsu’s beard. It was so weird...did he shave it like that? Were his pores just arranged that way? How?? Barnaby brought himself out of that one, citing lack of research.

            The third time happened after Kotetsu had no more questions. To be more accurate, this time was more of a mutual stare. Barnaby caught Kotetsu’s golden brown eyes and couldn’t look away. He could feel Kotetsu looking at him too, and wondered briefly if he’d gotten as lost as he had.

            A brush of fingertips across his knuckles drew Barnaby back to the present. There was a small smile on Kotetsu’s lips as his fingers continued to dance over Barnaby’s.

            “There are so many things I want to tell you.” Kotetsu whispered. Barnaby could somehow hear him over his own heartbeat thumping in his ears. “It’s...not going to easy waiting until December.” Kotetsu drew his hand back. “But I think it’s for the best.”

            Barnaby pursed his lips. “I hope so.” Kotetsu laughed.

            “Can’t you be a little more optimistic?”

            Barnaby shrugged and leaned back in his chair. “I’ll be more optimistic when I see your grade for this assignment.”

            “Ouch, Professor!” Kotetsu teased. Barnaby laughed.

            “I’m sure you’ll do fine though. I don’t think I need to worry about you anymore.”

            Kotetsu blinked. “You were worried about me?”

            “When you suddenly disappeared from my life? Yes, I was worried!” Barnaby sighed. “But you’ve already apologized for it. And you _are_ fulfilling all conditions for forgiveness so...” He shrugged slightly. “I guess I can afford to be a little optimistic.”

            Kotetsu grinned then, a wide, toothy thing. Barnaby’s heart did a little flip as Kotetsu started to pack up his things.

            “Same time next week, Professor?”

            “Same time next week.” Barnaby nodded.

            Kotetsu gave a little wave before he left and the door shut behind him with a clunk. Barnaby leaned forward, resting his elbow on the desk and his head in his hand. He sighed.

_Do I really have to wait over a month to kiss him?_

 

***

 

            Kotetsu spent the next few days focusing on his schoolwork in an effort to not think about Barnaby. This proved difficult while working on his robotics assignment, since Barnaby was his teacher. And it was especially hard since, from their interactions last tutorial, it was perfectly obvious that Barnaby returned his feelings. Not being able to spend a lot of time together was a slow torture.

            However, Kotetsu still stood by what he said then – waiting was for the best. Though, it was turning out to be more taxing than he originally thought it would. With his robotics notes splayed over his kitchen table, Kotetsu kept thinking about Barnaby’s bouncy hair, his green eyes, and how the corners of said eyes crinkled ever so slightly when he smiled.

            Kotetsu glanced at his phone, peeking out from under some papers. The idea occurred to him that he could call Barnaby; his number was still saved in his contacts. But Kotetsu shook his head soundly. He couldn’t just call at nine o’clock on a Monday evening. Not when their relationship was supposed to be strictly professional. He sighed and laid his head down on the table on top of his notes.

            His phone vibrated. Kotetsu ignored it; it was probably a good night text from Kaede and he could answ – _bzzt._ Okay, two texts he needed to answer now. He sat up and rescued his phone from under the papers and nearly jumped in surprise as his phone vibrated again. A photo of a bunny lit up the screen.

            Barnaby was calling him.

            The phone buzzed again in his hand and Kotetsu nearly dropped it trying to slide the green phone over to answer it.

            “Hello?” he said, tentatively.

            “ _Kotetsu-san? I’m sorry to suddenly call you like this..._ ” Barnaby’s voice trailed off.

            “No, no, it’s alright,” Kotetsu reassured him. “Is everything okay?”

            “ _Hm? Oh, yes, I’m fine. Everything’s fine, I..._ ” Barnaby took a breath and exhaled. Kotetsu could swear he felt it, even over the phone. “ _Honestly, I don’t have a reason for calling you._ ”

            There was a beat of silence before Kotetsu laughed heartily at Barnaby’s confession. “Well, Bunny-chan, I was actually thinking about calling you for no reason, too.”

            “ _Oh,_ ” came Barnaby’s reply. He laughed a little, too. “ _Well, then I’m glad I called._ ”

            “Me too.”

            Neither of them spoke for a moment. Kotetsu could hear Barnaby’s soft breathing over the sound of the rain that had just started outside. If Barnaby had been there physically, Kotetsu would have kissed him. Instead, he glanced at his papers and pulled one out.

            “So, Professor. Since I’ve got you on the line...can I ask you an assignment related question?”

            Barnaby hummed. “ _Let me get out my notes. I’ll do what I can._ ”

            “Thank you.” Kotetsu waited for the shuffling on Barnaby’s end to cease before delving into the trouble he’d been having. With Barnaby’s help, he managed to sort it out rather quickly. When Kotestu had finished thanking him, Barnaby said:

            “ _I hope this doesn’t mean you don’t need to come to the tutorial on Thursday._ ”

            “Ah,” Kotetsu paused. “Of course not! I’ll probably have, like, fifty new questions by Thursday! And besides, I promised I’d go, didn’t I?”

            Barnaby stifled a cough. “ _I thought that was just for the first one but...if you applied it to all the subsequent ones too then...I’ll hold you to that._ ” Barnaby’s voice was gentle with a hint of smugness to it.

            “Alright. Have a good night, Bunny.”

            “ _Good night, Kotetsu-san. I’ll see you in lecture Wednesday._ ”

            “Yes, see you.”

            Kotetsu’s thumb hovered over the red phone for a second after he brought the phone down from his ear. It took a good bit of resolve not to bring it back up and continue their conversation, but he soon disconnected the call. Kotetsu slouched back in his chair and sighed contently. It was strangely comforting to know Barnaby was having a hard time being patient too.

            Just a few more weeks...a few more weeks until he could tell him everything.

 

            As the days grew shorter, Kotetsu’s studying hours grew longer. He’d somehow managed to finish up all of his end of the semester assignments and essays on time, but now the final exams were looming around the corner.

            The weekend before the last week of class, when Kotetsu felt a little room to breathe, Kaede came to visit. Muramasa dropped her off Friday evening, citing his need to pick up something in the city, and Kotetsu returned her home on the Sunday. They had a nice little visit, even though Kaede had bombarded her father with rabbit facts and questions about Barnaby and it was all he could do not to let something slip. She had asked him to say hi especially from her, and Kotetsu promised he would.

            The tutorials with said professor had continued weekly as well. It still proved difficult for Kotetsu to be so close to him. He wanted to touch him so much – to embrace him, to hold his hand, to kiss him. Something. Anything! But he knew one thing could lead to another, so he kept his hands (mostly) on his papers and his thoughts (mostly) on robotics. He caught Barnaby staring at him a few more times, so there was that.

            On the last day of class – a Wednesday, of all days – the lecture hall was packed full. It was the fullest Kotetsu had seen it since the second lecture. He was nervous, at first, that since there were more students, someone was bound to see their little wave and nod ritual. But then, looking around most of the students were chatting with friends, or just laying their heads down on the long tables. The student on his right was turned away, and wouldn’t see him. The aisle was on his left, so no real worries there. He saw Barnaby look up to find him, as he did more often these days, and felt an emboldened, reckless urge.

            Instead of waving, Kotetsu blew a kiss. It wasn’t an over-the-top motion, just enough to get the message across. He saw Barnaby jump slightly, but after a moment, he made a subtle catching motion and pocketed the gesture for later.

            If someone had asked Kotetsu what that lecture was about, he wouldn’t have been able to tell them.

            That was the last time Kotetsu saw Barnaby until the day before the exam. He had previously scheduled one last tutorial with Barnaby for the Tuesday before the Wednesday Introductory Robotics final. All his other exams would be finished by then, most occurring in the first week of examinations. Barnaby would be finished officiating most of his exams as well. And since he had one that Tuesday morning, they’d agreed to meet at three o’clock to give him some time to eat and decompress.

            Tuesday afternoon arrived and Kotetsu made his way to the robotics building feeling confident. He felt his finals had gone relatively well and with all the help and guidance he had for robotics, his stress levels had gone way down. He glanced at his watch as he hurried up the stairs to the fourth floor.

            Kotetsu knocked on Barnaby’s office door at three p.m. sharp. He waited a few moments, expecting to hear an offer to enter but he got nothing. Confused, Kotetsu knocked again. Still nothing. He scratched at his beard before looking around furtively and then, seeing no one, trying the door.

            To Kotetsu’s surprise, it opened. Tentatively, he pushed inward and when he saw the light was on, he headed inside. The sight that greeted him was almost too beautiful.

            Barnaby was asleep at his desk, his head pillowed on a stack of papers. His breathing came slowly and lightly rustled the edges of the sheets under his head. He had the most serene look on his face; Kotetsu hated to wake him. But luckily, he didn’t have to.

            As the door clacked shut, Barnaby shifted and slowing raised his head. A sheet of paper stuck to his cheek for a second before fluttering back to the stack. Kotetsu stifled a laugh, but Barnaby heard it anyway and narrowed his eyes.

            “Kotetsu-san?” Barnaby said, his voice still thick with sleep.

            “Good morning, sleepyhead,” Kotetsu teased. Barnaby located his glasses and put them on.

            “I’m not dreaming, am I?”

            “Not unless I am too.”

            Barnaby smiled and shook his head a little before straightening up fully in his chair, stretching. “What time is it?”

            “Just after three.” Kotetsu paused. “Do you want me to get you a coffee or something?”

            “Hmm?” Barnaby rolled his shoulders. “No, I should be okay.” He shook his head, curls bouncing. “Sorry about this, Kotetsu-san. I thought I had set an alarm on my phone but obviously not.”

            “Don’t worry about it. You probably set it to a.m. by mistake.” Kotetsu smirked. “I got to see a cute, sleeping Bunny, so I don’t mind.” Barnaby shot him a look over the top of his glasses, but it wasn’t unkind. He sighed.

            “The stress of the season is finally getting to me.” Barnaby said, rearranging some of his errant curls. “I’ve had more takeout these past few days than I ever thought possible.”

            “Same here,” Kotetsu laughed. He placed his satchel on the left chair and something clicked into place in his mind. “Hey um...when all this is over,” he gestured vaguely, “how about I cook for you?”

            Barnaby blinked up at him. “Cook?”

            “Yeah, we could talk over or after dinner.” Kotetsu shrugged lightly. “Or something.”

            “I’d like that.” A smile tugged at the corners of Barnaby’s lips.

            “Great!” Kotetsu sat down and gave a thumbs up. He held it out over the desk and waited for a moment. Barnaby just kind of looked at him. “C’mon, Bunny, don’t leave me hanging!”

            “That is the weirdest high five I’ve ever seen.”

            “It’s not a high five!” Kotetsu pouted. “You also do the thumbs up, and we bump fists.” Barnaby gave him a skeptical look. “It’s a thing!”

            “Okay, old man.” Barnaby chuckled, but he obligingly stuck his thumb up and tapped his hand against Kotetsu’s. Kotetsu nodded satisfactorily. “Now – you have questions about the final?”

            “No,” Kotetsu began. “I have questions about the final review questions – you’ll never tell me anything about the actual final.” He smiled confidently. Barnaby smirked.

            “Right you are, Mr. Kaburagi.”

            Kotetsu pulled out his notes and they got down to work. Luckily, Kotetsu didn’t seem to have too many questions. He was pleased to see that most of what he’d learnt over the semester had stuck. Barnaby was a good teacher, after all.

            Unfortunately, that meant his time with Barnaby today was short. Within half an hour, he was packing up his things and getting ready to leave. He could tell Barnaby was trying to keep a professional face, but an air of loneliness seemed to surround him as he watched Kotetsu shoulder his satchel.

            “Barnaby,” Kotetsu paused, reconsidering the cheesy line about rabbits and loneliness circling in his head. He opted for a bright smile. “I’ll see you at the exam tomorrow.”

            Barnaby nodded. “I’ll be in touch once the final grades are up.”

            “Okay. Bye!” Kotetsu used most of his willpower to open the door and exit the office, leaving a waving Barnaby behind. The rest he used to propel himself down the stairs and out of the building. He took comfort in the fact that soon he would be able to hold Barnaby in his arms again. But until then...it was agonizing.


	12. So Are We Dating Now Or...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally!!! My patient readers, here is the last chapter. It's entirely fluff...! I had a lot of fun writing this and my lovely betas enjoyed it, so I hope you do too! And thank you for your support, kudos and comments you've given me throughout this fic! They helped me keep going even when I wasn't sure where I was going with this haha they really are the life blood of writers. Anyway, I won't keep you any longer! Please enjoy :D

             Barnaby tapped the down arrow key rhythmically as he double checked the final grades on his spreadsheet. Every so often, he’d see one that seemed too high or too low and he’d have to check the entered grades for that individual. Once or twice he’d found an error, but these were few and far between.

            He pressed definitively one final time as he reached the bottom of the list. Barnaby heaved a sigh and straightened his back, stretching with a groan. He flopped back into his chair.

            “Done,” he whispered. _Well, almost._

            Barnaby drew his attention back to his computer. He saved the file into his ‘FINAL’ folder and submitted the document to the school’s online system as quick as it would let him. Rolling his shoulders, Barnaby reached for his phone. The final grades wouldn’t be posted for another couple of days, but there was no harm in telling Kotetsu that they were done.

            Flipping his phone open, he saw a text from Nathan that he had missed. ‘ _Drinks Thursday?’_ was all it said. Barnaby made a mental note to respond when he knew what his plans with Kotetsu were. He typed out a message to his soon-to-be-former student and hopefully-soon-to-be boyfriend:

            ‘ _Final grades are finally submitted!!’_

            That wasn’t _too_ excited, was it? Barnaby shrugged. He _was_ excited – why should he hide it? He sent the text and began to pack up his things. A glance out his window showed how dark it had become, even though it was only mid-afternoon. The short December days were rather dreary, but Barnaby couldn’t help but feel happy.

            He had just finished wrapping his scarf around his neck when his phone rang. Barnaby hung the hanger still holding his coat back up and grabbed his phone from his pocket. He couldn’t help but answer with a smile when he saw who was calling.

            “Good evening, Kotetsu-san.”

            “ _Hey, Bunny-chan! So, you’re finished grading the finals?_ ”

            “We finished that yesterday, actually.” Barnaby leaned against his desk. “Today I was entering the marks from the final, and collating the final, final grades. I submitted them to the university for all of my classes today.”

            “ _Oh, wow!_ ” Kotetsu said, awestruck. “ _That’s a lot of work._ ”

            “It is.” Barnaby agreed. “But it’s done now – another semester down.”

            “ _Now you can relax?_ ”

            “For the most part.” Barnaby laughed. “Although I do have to start prepping for next semester.”

            “ _Already?_ ”  Kotetsu whistled. “ _The life of a professor is hard._ ”

            “It’s not so bad.” Barnaby shook his head, and there was a brief silence where he realized that Kotetsu couldn’t see the gesture.

            “ _So! The reason I called –_ ”

            “To hear my voice?” Barnaby ventured, smirking. He heard Kotetsu let out a little breath.

            “... _yes_...” came the muttered response, soon followed with an enthusiastic, “ _But! The university website says grades will be up this Wednesday. And uh, I was wondering if you...were free for dinner on Thursday?”_

            “This coming Thursday?”

            “ _Mmhm_.”

            “Yes! I am!” Barnaby said, maybe too loud. He cleared his throat and continued more subdued. “I’ll look forward to it.”

            “ _Awesome_.” Kotetsu said. Barnaby swore he could hear the smile on Kotetsu’s face when he spoke. “ _Come over around six p.m. I’ll do my best to have dinner waiting for you_.”

            Barnaby’s heart soared at the promise.

            “Okay. Oh, can you text me your address? I don’t quite remember where it is.”

            “ _Of course_.” Kotetsu chuckled softly. “ _If I ever get off the phone with you_.”

            “We haven’t been talking for that long.” Barnaby laughed.

            “ _I wouldn’t mind if we did though_.” Kotetsu’s almost whisper had Barnaby’s heart doing back flips. He hummed in agreement, wishing he could make time go slower. Barnaby opened his mouth to respond further but his stomach rumbled hungrily. He laughed softly and said:

            “Neither would I. But my stomach just informed me that I’m quite hungry.”

            “ _Ah, so we’ll have to cut it short then, eh?_ ”

            “Yes, unfortunately. I was just on my way out when you called, so I need to get home and eat.” Barnaby pursed his lips. “But I’m really glad you called. I didn’t realize how much I missed your voice.”

            There was no mistaking the sound of Kotetsu’s sharp intake of breath on the other side of the line. A mumbled “ _Metoo_ ” followed. Barnaby smiled and closed his eyes, picturing Kotetsu holding his phone close to his ear, as he was doing now.

            “I’ll see you soon, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby whispered.

            “ _See you, Barnaby_.” Came the return whisper.

            Reluctantly, Barnaby brought the phone away from his ear and looked at his screen. The call was still going. He waited a few moments to see if maybe Kotetsu would hang up first. The connection continued for another ten seconds, neither party wanting to end it. But Barnaby’s stomach growled again, and he hastily pressed the red phone button. He sighed and reminded himself that he would see Kotetsu in a few days. Barnaby slipped the phone back into his pocket and donned his coat. But the extra layer was a poor substitution for the warm embrace he really wanted.

 

***

 

            Thursday arrived, and Kotetsu sat anxiously on his couch. It was getting closer to six p.m. by the minute, but he hadn’t heard from Barnaby about whether he’d left yet or not. Kotetsu didn’t want to start dinner yet if Barnaby was going to be late, but if he was already on his way, then Kotetsu should have started by now. It also didn’t help that his brain was taking this time to remind him of the kiss they shared the other time Barnaby had been at his place. He let out a frustrated sigh.

            His phone buzzed in his pocket. Kotetsu leapt to his feet, pulling out his phone in the process. He fumbled with it a bit, almost dropping it in his excitement to read whatever message was there. He smiled when he saw the message was indeed from Barnaby. A short, sweet ‘ _On my way :)’._

Kotetsu grinned and set to work.

 

            The doorbell rang just as Kotetsu had set the fried rice to keep warm on the backburner. His heart thumped loudly in his chest as he double checked that the oven was safe to leave before heading to his front door.

            Kotetsu opened it to reveal a bundled-up Barnaby, scarf paired nicely with his stylish winter coat. Kotetsu paused for a moment, suddenly unsure of his actions. His deer-in-the-headlights moment didn’t last long, as Barnaby smirked a little and swiftly crossed the threshold to pull him into a tight embrace. Kotetsu sighed a little, pulling Barnaby further inside and nudging the door shut with his foot. He hugged Barnaby back, pulling him as close as he could, enjoying the scent of citrus that filled his nose.

            They remained like that for a bit, neither wanting to let go. Barnaby rubbed small circles on Kotetsu’s back and Kotetsu nuzzled against Barnaby’s scarf. A timer went off in the kitchen, reminding Kotetsu about the special surprise he had planned for Barnaby. He stepped back.

            “Dinner’s almost ready.” Kotetsu smiled. “Please make yourself at home, Bunny.”

            “Thank you, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby nodded and began to remove his coat and boots. “It smells wonderful!”

            “Good, good!” Kotetsu smiled wide as he grabbed two large plates for the rice and scooped some onto each. With his back to Barnaby he carefully opened the small grilling compartment on his oven to retrieve the hopefully-not-overdone salmon he had also prepared. Kotetsu hummed gleefully as he plated the fish.

            Glancing over his shoulder, he met Barnaby’s eyes from where he was already seated at the table. Barnaby perked up, his cheeks colouring a little as he looked at Kotetsu expectantly. Kotetsu smiled and brought the plates of fried rice over.

            “I present to you, Kotetsu’s famous fried rice!” Barnaby made a pleased noise as Kotetsu placed the plate in front of him. “Go on, have a taste!”

            “Ah,” Barnaby glanced around a bit. “Kotetsu-san, you haven’t given me any utensils.”

            “Oops, must’ve forgot.” Kotetsu shrugged, sounding very much like he had forgotten on purpose. Barnaby gave him a skeptical look.

            “Oh, really?”

            Kotetsu ignored Barnaby and hummed some more as he headed back to the kitchen for the spoons – but more importantly the salmon. He returned with a flourish.

            “I forgot one more thing, it seems.” Kotetsu placed the smaller plate in front of Barnaby. “A special side of grilled salmon!” Barnaby looked up, his mouth slightly agape. Kotetsu winked. Warmth bubbled up inside him as Barnaby smiled, his eyes crinkling at the edges.

            “Kotetsu-san, this is wonderful! I can’t believe you remembered – I could just kiss you – !” Barnaby’s face turned a darker shade of red and Kotetsu felt his own face mirror the expression. “Uh,” Barnaby mumbled. “Can I?”

            Kotetsu nodded slightly as Barnaby stood up from the chair. His voice was little over a whisper: “Yeah.”

            They met each other halfway in a gentle, almost tentative kiss – and immediately went in for another. Barnaby cupped Kotetsu’s cheek and Kotetsu pulled Barnaby closer at the waist. In between the second and third kisses, they smiled at each other and giggled a bit, giddy at the physical contact they’d both been craving. After the fourth, Kotetsu broke away.

            “Okay, the food’s going to get cold if we don’t eat it.”

            “Oh, right,” Barnaby laughed. “Thank you, Kotetsu-san, it looks delicious!”

            “I hope it tastes as good as it looks!” Kotetsu chuckled. “Would you like something to drink? Some rosé wine, perhaps?”

            “You’re spoiling me, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby said after taking his seat. Kotetsu shrugged.

            “You deserve it.” Kotetsu beamed at the gratitude plain on Barnaby’s face. “Was that a yes to the wine?”

            “Yes, please.” Barnaby nodded.

            Kotetsu poured two glasses. He wasn’t entirely sure how it would taste, but the liquor store clerk had assured him it would please any rosé fan. He set the glasses down on the table and took his seat. Barnaby was chewing with his eyes closed, a satisfied expression gracing his features. Kotetsu watched, mesmerized as Barnaby nodded and finished chewing, finally opening his eyes.

            “It’s delicious, Kotetsu-san.”

            “Thank you, I’m glad you like it!” Kotetsu welled up with pride as Barnaby enthusiastically ate another spoonful. Kotetsu dug into his fried rice as well, his stomach lightly rumbling.

            They continued their meal at a medium pace, discussing the end of exams and how Kotetsu had fared. They commiserated over how stressful it was and how glad they were that it was over, for now at least. Kotetsu shuddered to think of going through it again, though he knew he must.

            “As much as it was a pleasure to have you as my student, Kotetsu-san,” Barnaby said, rubbing the side of Kotetsu’s leg with his foot, “I’m glad you’re not anymore.”

            The come-hither look on Barnaby’s face combined with his touch made Kotetsu blush. He gulped down his mouthful of rice, sliding it past the lump in his throat.

            “Me too. Though,” Kotetsu paused and took a sip of wine. “It might take a while before I stop associating you with calculus problems.” Barnaby chuckled.

            “We’ll have to work on that.” He nudged Kotetsu’s foot with his own, inciting a footsies battle that lasted practically the rest of their meal. Each time one of them thought they had won, the other would give a casual nudge and smirk. Kotetsu found he loved the playfulness that sparkled in Barnaby’s eyes.

            Kotetsu’s phone rang just as they had finished dinner. He pulled the buzzing device out of his pocket to see his daughter’s name and photo on the screen.

            “Ah, Bunny, do you mind if I take this? It’s my daughter.”

            “No, go ahead.” Barnaby nodded. Kotetsu answered on the third ring.

            “Hello, Kaede~”

            “ _Hi, Dad!_ ” Kaede said cheerfully. “ _Grandma wants to know when you’re coming home for Christmas._ ”

            “Ah, Christmas!” He had almost forgotten. “Yes, I’m coming!”

            “When, _Dad?_ ” Kaede insisted.

            “Oh, well, I’ve got a few things to wrap up here. Uh, I guess I’ll drive up on the Saturday. I’ll probably be there sometime in the afternoon?”

            “ _Oh_ _good! Then, will you come with me to school next Monday to pick up Barnaby?_ ”

            Kotetsu coughed. “Barnaby?!”

            Barnaby, who had been clearing the table, looked over at the sound of his name.

            “ _The rabbit, Dad!_ ” Kaede reminded him. “ _You held him and everything!_ ”

            “Oh yeah, I did hold him, didn’t I?” Kotetsu winked at the Barnaby in his kitchen, who stifled a laugh.

            “ _I volunteered to take care of him over the break. I’m so excited!_ ”

            “No worries, Kaede, I’ll go with you to pick him up.”

            “ _Thanks, Dad!!_ ”

            “Anything else, sweetie?” Kotetsu asked.

            “ _Hmm._..” Kaede hummed in thought. “ _Oh yeah! Did you remember to tell the actual Barnaby that I said hi?_ ”

            Kotetsu smacked his forehead with the base of his palm. “Ah, sorry, Kaede! I totally forgot to say hi to Professor Barnaby for you.”

            From in front of the sink, Barnaby caught Kotetsu’s eye. Kotetsu vaguely heard Kaede’s protests and moanings in his ear as he watched Barnaby make a phone gesture with his hand. He also mouthed something but Kotetsu wasn’t very good at reading lips.

            “Ah, Kaede, could you hold on for a second please?”

            “ _Okay_ ,” Kaede huffed. “ _But don’t be too long!_ ”

            “I won’t,” Kotetsu promised. He held his phone to his chest and walked over to Barnaby and whispered, “What was that, Bunny?”

            “Do you want me to talk to her?” Barnaby whispered back.

            “Eh? But...” Kotetsu considered his offer. Kaede would love this! But how was he to explain why Barnaby was over at his place? “You really don’t mind?”

            “I wouldn’t have offered if I minded.” Barnaby smiled. Kotetsu couldn’t help but smile back.

            “Thank you, Bunny-chan.” Kotetsu kissed Barnaby lightly on the cheek and then brought the phone back to his ear. “Sorry about that, Kaede. Although I think you’ll find it was worth it.”

            “ _Hmm? How so?_ ”

            “Well, you wanted to say hi to Professor Barnaby, right?”

            “ _Yeeeessss...?_ ” she said skeptically.

            “You’re in luck, because he’s actually here with me right now and he says he’d like to talk to you.”

            Kaede gasped and Kotetsu heard her scamper around as if the very idea of talking to Barnaby had suddenly given her extra energy that needed to escape somehow. Kotetsu could relate. But her voice was still skeptical when she spoke again.

            “ _He’s really there? You’re not going to pull some voice trick like you did with Santa Claus, are you?_ ”

            “Yes, he’s really here! No voice tricks, I promise.” Kotetsu laughed. “If you don’t talk to him, he’s going to start doing my dishes, which I just can’t have.” Barnaby poked Kotetsu teasingly in the stomach.

            “ _Okay! I want to talk to Barnaby please!_ ”

            “Okay!” Kotetsu copied. Handing the phone over to Barnaby, he said, “I’ll trade you the phone for the dish towel.” Kaede’s tittering laughter echoed Kotetsu’s as Barnaby took the device and handed Kotetsu the towel.

            “Hello, Kaede-chan.”

            Kotetsu heard his daughter’s thrilled squeal from the other side of the phone. He stifled a laugh as Barnaby winced at the shrill sound so close to his ear, but to his credit he managed to remain smiling. Kotetsu couldn’t hear what Kaede said next, but from Barnaby’s ‘no, it’s alright. I understand you’re excited’ it was probably an apology. Kotetsu turned his attention to the dishes then, opting to give them a little privacy. But he couldn’t help catching snippets of Barnaby’s side of the exchange.

            “Kotetsu-san tells me you enjoy science. Which areas do you find most interesting?”

            “My research? Well, I can go into a bit of detail...”

            “No, your father – Kotetsu-san – he’s been very kind to me.”

            Kotetsu felt his face heat up at that remark as he scrubbed at a particularly stuck-on grain of rice. Finally getting it, he rinsed the pan, losing the next exchange of the conversation to the sound of running water. He jumped a little when he felt an arm around his waist and Barnaby appeared at his side.

            “Your daughter asked me to tell you good night and to thank you for letting her speak to me.”

            “That was kind of your own idea,” Kotetsu chuckled softly. Barnaby slid the phone back into Kotetsu’s pocket.

            “She also asked if I’d like to come over for Christmas dinner.”

            “Eh?” The dish Kotetsu was cleaning splashed back into the sink ungracefully. _That was rather forward of her!_

            “Well, actually, I heard an older woman ask her to ask me.”

            “Mom,” Kotetsu sighed, retrieving the dish from the soapy water. “What did you tell her?”

            “I said that I already had plans with my family, but thank you for the offer.”

            Kotetsu hummed. _That’s probably for the best._

            “She also asked about New Year’s.” Barnaby said, giving Kotetsu’s hip a light squeeze.

            “Oh,” Kotetsu turned around to face Barnaby as the sink drained behind him. Barnaby’s hand glided across Kotetsu’s back to settle on his other hip.

            “I usually go to Nathan’s – he throws a party every year. But I said I’d talk to you.”

            Kotetsu hummed again. For Barnaby to be meeting his mother before the next semester even started...it seemed a bit –

            “Too fast?” Barnaby guessed.

            “A little, maybe.” Kotetsu agreed. “But...” he pulled Barnaby a little closer and rested a hand at the small of his back. “I have a feeling that one, my mother will pester me until she meets you. And two,” Kotetsu caressed Barnaby’s cheek with his free hand, “that you’ll be around for a while, so it’s not a bad idea.” Barnaby huffed a laugh.

            “I _hope_ I’m around for a while!”

            “Me too.”

            It was all too easy to pull Barnaby in for another kiss. Kotetsu ran his thumb lightly across Barnaby’s cheek as he revelled in the gentle press of their lips.

            Barnaby pressed in further, much to Kotetsu’s delight. The hand not squeezing possessively at his hip came up to get tangled in his hair. Kotetsu slid his own hand from Barnaby’s cheek to the back of his head, pulling him closer still. Barnaby sighed, open-mouthed and Kotetsu leaned forward, sliding his tongue along Barnaby’s bottom lip. Barnaby’s tongue sought out Kotetsu’s, and they intertwined in a heady exchange.

            Barnaby drew back, catching his breath and Kotetsu took the opportunity to move away from the counter, where it had been digging into his lower back. Barnaby smiled at him through half-lidded eyes and Kotetsu smiled back, smitten. Riding on the coattails of that wonderful kiss, Kotetsu gathered his courage and asked:

            “Is this the part of the night where I ask you to stay and try not to seem desperate?”

            Barnaby chuckled. “If so, then it’s also the part of the night where I admit to having an overnight bag in my car, and I also try not to seem desperate.” Kotetsu laughed and rested his forehead on Barnaby’s.

            “You’d better go get that then, because I really would like it if you stayed.” Kotetsu admitted. Barnaby’s smile widened and he gave Kotetsu a chaste kiss.

            “I’ll be right back.”

            Kotetsu watched Barnaby grab his keys out of his coat pocket and proceed outside without said coat on. He shook his head and pulled out the kettle to boil some water. Barnaby returned a few moments later, just as Kotetsu was plugging in the kettle. He looked as though he’d run to his car and back.

            “I put some water on to boil,” Kotetsu said. “Would you like some tea? Perhaps with something stronger?”

            “Hmm...” Barnaby set his bag down and walked over. “Well, since I won’t be driving anywhere tonight, how about with the something stronger?”

            “Two teas with a kick, coming right up!” Kotetsu grinned. When he didn’t move right away, Barnaby cocked his head at him.

            “You’re not moving.”

            “Well, that water still has to boil.” Kotetsu motioned to the kettle with his head.

            “Oh,” Barnaby said suggestively as he moved closer. “Then I guess I have time to steal a kiss?”

            “Steal? Oh, Bunny, you don’t have to steal any.” Kotetsu explained. “I’ll give them to you freely.”

            They kissed again, this one as wonderful as the others. Kotetsu gently ran his hands down Barnaby’s sides, bringing them together at the base of his spine. Barnaby shivered a little, but he was smiling as he brought his own hands up Kotetsu’s back to grip at his shoulders. Kotetsu laughed lightly as he lazily kissed Barnaby, pulling softly on his bottom lip. Barnaby kissed him back, his tongue finding Kotetsu’s once more.

            They made out until the water was done boiling, the click of the kettle timing well with Barnaby’s playful grab of Kotetsu’s butt. Kotetsu jumped a little at the touch, the kettle’s click not helping his case. Kotetsu pulled back to admire Barnaby’s smiling face, his hand still on his ass.

            “Why don’t you go pick a movie while I make our drinks, Mr. Grabby Bunny?”

            “Hmmm,” Barnaby considered the offer. “I suppose having my hand on your butt would be distracting.”

            “A little, yeah.” Kotetsu agreed.

            “Alright,” Barnaby huffed, taking his hand back. “I’ll go judge your taste in movies now.”

            “Please don’t judge me too harshly.” Kotetsu laughed.

            As Barnaby began to rifle through Kotetsu’s (rather disorganized) DVD collection, Kotetsu set about making their drinks. Alone with his thoughts for a moment, he considered how he wanted the rest of the night to go. There was obviously a great attraction between them – the heat on his face and the fast beating of his heart could attest to that. But Kotetsu hadn’t seriously dated anyone since Tomoe had passed. His game was off, and knowing that, maybe he needed some more time before he had it turned on again - although Barnaby had been doing a pretty good job at turning _him_ on thus far.

            He glanced over to where Barnaby was, not seeing more than a swift bounce of his curls over the couch. Even just that fleeting sight brought a smile to Kotetsu’s face. And with that, he had his decision. He should take it slow. A feeling like this doesn’t come around very often, and Kotetsu wanted to treasure it. So for tonight, he, Kotetsu T. Kaburagi wouldn’t take things any further than they had already gone.

As he finished up mixing the drinks, Kotetsu grabbed an orange from the bowl on the counter and cut it into slices. He usually never bothered with a garnish, but today was special. He slid one slice onto each of their glasses and the rest he laid on a plate for a snack.

            Laughter erupted from behind the couch just as Kotetsu was about to grab the drinks. Luckily, he hadn’t actually picked them up yet.

            “Kotetsu-san, what is this?!” Barnaby asked, holding up a DVD case over the couch.

           “One sec,” Kotetsu moved closer so he could read the box more readily. “Oh, Sharknado!”

            “What?!” Barnaby turned the case back to face himself, eyes wide. “So I didn’t read it wrong??”

            “Nope! That’s the real deal.” Kotetsu laughed.

            “Why?! Why is this even a thing?”

            “There are three sequels.” Kotetsu deadpanned.

            “No!” Barnaby covered his face.

            “I see you have chosen our entertainment for this evening.” Kotetsu teased.

            “Oh, no, Kotetsu-san, we can’t watch this.” Barnaby pleaded, but he was still smiling.

            “Why not?” Kotetsu grinned. “You seem to be enjoying yourself and you’ve only seen the cover.”

            “This just...I don’t understand why!” Barnaby stared at the case.

            “There are a lot of b-rated shark horror movies, Bunny!” Kotetsu sighed and moved around the couch, taking the case from Barnaby’s hands. “This one just goes an extra step of ridiculousness!” Kotetsu popped open the DVD player and put the disc in before Barnaby could make any more protests.

            “Okay, okay, you got me!” Barnaby sighed, defeated. “I’m intrigued but – ” he pointed at Kotetsu, “this does not mean I’m watching any of the sequels.”

            “Alright, but if you get hooked...” Kotetsu trailed off as he went to grab their drinks. He heard Barnaby groan softly at the thought. The TV was all set up once Kotetsu returned a second time with the plate of orange slices. He set that down beside the drinks and moved to sit beside Barnaby on the couch.

            Kotetsu wondered briefly how their seating arrangement would go. Would they just sit beside each other, untouching? He inwardly scoffed at the idea soon after thinking of it. He _was_ sitting next to Mr. Grabby Bunny after all. Kotetsu put both of his arms on the back of the couch and, as if it was a natural thing, Barnaby leaned onto him.

            “Oh,” Barnaby paused. “This is okay, right?”

            “You? There?” Kotetsu smiled. “Perfect.” He lowered his arm to wrap it around Barnaby’s shoulders. Barnaby leaned into the touch and raised a hand up to hold Kotetsu’s.  He unfortunately had to break the contact to grab their drinks off the table, but after that they nestled back together. As the movie played, the vibration of Barnaby’s laughter on his chest made Kotetsu fill with warmth. Or maybe that was the drink in his hand. _A little bit of both, perhaps._

            Their drinks finished and orange slices eaten, Kotetsu and Barnaby settled into a comfortable position. However, disturbed by jump scares and the occasional hoot of laughter at the ridiculousness of the movie, Barnaby slowly migrated downwards. He ended up lying curled up on the couch using Kotetsu’s lap as a pillow. After a particularly gore-filled scene, Barnaby turned so he was lying face up and pouted.

            “Kotetsu-san, we’re at least 45 minutes in and I haven’t seen any sharks in any tornadoes yet.”

            “Don’t worry, Bunny, you’ll get your sharknadoes. Promise.” Kotetsu smiled down at Barnaby, enamoured with the petulant expression on his face.

            Barnaby grumbled and turned to face the TV again, head still in Kotetsu’s lap. Kotetsu laughed softly and gazed fondly at the back of Barnaby’s head. Without thinking too much about it, Kotetsu ran the back of his hand over Barnaby’s hair. He marvelled at the softness of it.

            “Kotetsu-san,” Barnaby squirmed a little. “Are you petting my hair?”

            “Oh, sorry.” Kotetsu drew his hand away. “It’s just so soft.”

            “I didn’t say you had to stop.” Barnaby mumbled. “It...feels nice.”

            “Oh. Okay.” Kotetsu smiled.

            The movie continued to play as Kotetsu returned to stroking Barnaby’s hair. Truth be told, he wasn’t really watching the movie anymore and hadn’t been for a while. It was so much more interesting to watch Barnaby’s reactions to it. And getting to play with his hair was an added bonus. Kotetsu almost felt like he was in a dream. But he was shaken from his reverie with a daunting revelation when Barnaby shot up and said:

            “Oh my god, there are THREE of them!”

            _I love him._

            Barnaby chuckled, eyes glued to the screen as Kotetsu tried his best to formulate a response that wasn’t the three little words running laps around his head. Yes, he’d _known_ he was in love, in a sense, but not quite like this. No, now he felt it deep in his heart, in his gut even, that he was honest to goodness in love with this man. And he wanted to tell him. He wanted to tell Barnaby so bad right now, just pull him close and kiss him until the movie was over. Longer even! But then where was all that talk earlier of not moving too fast? Weren’t you supposed to wait until at least the third date for an admission like that? Maybe it was longer...but what if you knew the person before you started dating?

            “Kotetsu-san?”

            “Yes, Bunny, I’m here.” Kotetsu said, inwardly kicking himself for not saying anything earlier. Barnaby hid a laugh.

            “I know you are, but are you okay? You’ve been spacing out for a bit.”

            “Yeah, I’m okay.” Kotetsu nodded. “It’s nothing to worry about, really.” He glanced back at the screen. “The best part’s coming up, let’s watch.”

            “Okay.” Barnaby said, turning back to the movie but not before giving Kotetsu a concerned look. Kotetsu sighed silently. What was he going to do with himself? He glanced back at Barnaby, whose eyes were sparkling with intrigue again, thankfully. He smiled and took Barnaby’s hand in his own, intertwining their fingers. He’d tell him eventually – just maybe not tonight. They held hands for the rest of the movie.

            As the credits rolled, Barnaby was laughing so hard that Kotetsu was afraid he’d split in two, just like the chainsaw had done to the shark.

            “Are you going to be okay, Bunny?” Kotetsu asked, laughing as well.

            “I still can’t believe – ” Barnaby gulped a breath between laughs, “ – she was INSIDE the shark!”

            “I told you this movie was ridiculous!”

            “I should’ve known that the moment I read the word ‘sharknado’ with my own two eyes!” Barnaby trailed off into quiet laughter. After a moment, Kotetsu asked:

            “Do you want to watch the second one?”

            “No!” Barnaby exclaimed, devolving into laughter once again. “No, thank you.” He wiped at the corners of his eyes. “I’m, actually rather tired now. Probably from all this laughing!”

            “Bed time, then?”

            “Yes, that sounds wonderful.” Barnaby smiled and Kotetsu recognized that glint in his eyes.

            “Okay,” he said, quickly standing up and gathering up the glasses in an effort to move away. Kotetsu felt a hand on his arm.

            “Um, Kotetsu-san,” Barnaby said, rather fast. Kotetsu sat back down and steeled himself. _Nothing more than before – cuddling, kissing, that’s it._

“What is it, Bunny?”

            “Well, I was wondering, uh, since I am staying over...” Barnaby glanced away. “Will we be sleeping in the same bed?”

            “Oh,” Kotetsu looked at Barnaby with his mouth slightly agape. That wasn’t too fast, right? “Um, if you want to? I just assumed I’d be sleeping on the couch.” Although, thinking about it now, he’d wondered why he’d ever thought that. Barnaby’s suggestion just made sense.

            “I would like that.” Barnaby nodded and smiled. Kotetsu returned the gesture and stood up again to return the glasses to the kitchen. He turned around to find Barnaby draped over the back of the couch. “What a lovely view.” Barnaby teased, gesturing to Kotetsu’s backside.

            “Ah hah,” Kotetsu walked back over to the couch. “About that.”

            “Yes?” Barnaby sat up on his knees; he didn’t quite match Kotetsu’s height. The concerned look was back. Kotetsu sighed.

            “Barnaby, I like you a lot, and I – um...” Kotetsu scratched at the back of his head. _How to explain this..._ “What I’m trying to say is, uh, I don’t...want to move too fast.” Kotetsu half-shrugged, half winced at how to-the-point he’d been but Barnaby agreed readily.

            “Of course, Kotetsu-san. I – ” Barnaby took a breath. “I like you a lot, too.”

            “You’re wonderful.” Kotetsu whispered as he leaned down to kiss Barnaby. The kiss this time was long and gentle, a tender caress of their lips. Barnaby drew back first, cheeks flushed and eyes half-lidded. Kotetsu marvelled at how pretty his eyelashes were before Barnaby’s smile drew his attention. His heart raced as he smiled back.

            “Guests get to use the bathroom first.” Kotetsu said, still smiling like an idiot.

            “Alright.” Barnaby leaned back onto his feet and stood up. “I’ll see you in a few.”

            Kotetsu nodded and watched as Barnaby picked up his overnight bag and headed to the bathroom. Just before he entered, Kotetsu remembered himself.

            “Towels are under the sink if you need one!” he called.

            “Thanks!” Barnaby smiled and waved before disappearing from sight into the bathroom.

            While Barnaby was busy, Kotetsu set about getting himself ready for bed. He usually slept in his underwear and a tank top but given his present company he opted for sweatpants as well. If he got too warm he could always stick his feet off the side of the bed. He heard the water running but not knowing when Barnaby would be done – and wishing to avoid any embarrassing situations – Kotetsu set his clothes in a pile beside him and waited.

            As it turns out, he could’ve gotten changed five times over and still had time to spare. When Barnaby finally emerged from the bathroom, his hair was wet and his skin was practically glowing.

            “All yours, Kotetsu-san.” Barnaby smiled.

            “You, or the bathroom?” Kotetsu joked, walking towards him. Barnaby laughed.

            “Both, I suppose.” He leaned in for a kiss and Kotetsu gladly gave him one.

            “I’ll be right out.”

            Kotetsu quickly got ready – in less than half the time it took Barnaby, he commended himself. He emerged, teeth brushed and dressed for bed to find Barnaby already under the covers. He was propped up with a pillow, doing something on his phone. He glanced up when he heard Kotetsu and flipped the phone shut, placing it on the bedside table. He patted the bed next to him. Kotetsu shut off the lights as he headed towards the bed.

            “Inviting me in?” Kotetsu chuckled, getting under the covers himself. “How kind of you.” They sat there for a bit, looking at each other and the bed rather awkwardly. Kotetsu’s heart was beating a thousand miles a minute even though he knew nothing was going to happen. Except it might; he was discovering he was weak when it came to Barnaby.

            “Can I be the big spoon?” Barnaby’s voice brought Kotetsu back to the here and now. He frowned at the suggestion.

            “But I’m always the big spoon!”

            Barnaby huffed but he was smiling as he took off his glasses and placed them on the bedside table. He lay down facing Kotetsu.

            “Then we’ll just have to look at each other all night, I guess.” Barnaby smirked. Kotetsu sighed.

            “Okay, okay,” Kotetsu shuffled under the covers and turned his back to Barnaby. “This doesn’t mean I wouldn’t mind looking at you all night!”

            “I know,” Barnaby whispered. He pulled Kotetsu against his chest and wrapped his arms around him. Warmth bloomed on Kotetsu’s back and he sighed contently. “Is this okay, then?” Barnaby whispered again, but this time oh so close to Kotetsu’s ear. Kotetsu shivered slightly and nestled into Barnaby’s arms.

            “Yeah. This is nice.”

            Barnaby laughed softly and pressed a kiss to Kotetsu’s neck. “I’m glad.”

            Kotetsu brought his hand up to hold Barnaby’s, lacing their fingers together as best he could. Barnaby hummed, the vibration raising the hairs on the back of Kotetsu’s neck. He shivered again, but it wasn’t from any cold. It simply wasn’t fair how good Barnaby made him feel. Kotetsu furrowed his brow. He knew this wasn’t a one sided thing, but he just had to make sure.

            “Bunny...are you happy?”

            “Hm?” Barnaby shifted behind Kotetsu. “Of course I am. You make me very happy, Kotetsu.” Kotetsu noted the lack of honorific as Barnaby paused. “Are you?”

            “Eh?” Kotetsu rolled over onto his back and Barnaby sat up a little, resting on his forearm.

            “Do I make you happy?” Barnaby repeated.

            “Yes, very!”

            “Then what’s the problem?” Barnaby asked sincerely.

            Kotetsu sighed and reached up to touch Barnaby’s face. Barnaby nuzzled Kotetsu’s hand, his figure illuminated in the soft moonlight from the window behind him. Kotetsu wondered at how beautiful he was.

            “I don’t want to mess this up,” Kotetsu admitted quietly.

            “You won’t. I promise.” Barnaby leaned down and kissed Kotetsu on the lips. Kotetsu shifted his hand from Barnaby’s cheek to the back of his head, tangling in his hair. Their kiss deepened, tongues teasing each other. Barnaby ran a hand through Kotetsu’s hair, or at least what he could get of it with Kotetsu laying on his back. Barnaby nibbled on Kotetsu’s bottom lip, drawing a small, satisfied moan from the older man.

            Kotetsu suddenly rolled on top of Barnaby, kissing him still. Barnaby made a surprised noise, but it didn’t deter him from bringing both hands up to grab fistfuls of Kotetsu’s hair. Kotetsu moved his lips to Barnaby’s neck, kissing and sucking as he moved over to just below Barnaby’s ear. The blissful sounds Barnaby was making urged Kotetsu on, and he moved on to the dip in Barnaby’s neck where his clavicles met.

            “Kotetsu-sa-ah! – wait.”

            Kotetsu paused obligingly and lifted his face up to look at Barnaby’s. His mouth was open slightly, his breathing laboured. Kotetsu couldn’t tell in the dark, but if his own face was any indicator, his cheeks were probably flushed too.

            “I thought we were going to take it slow.” Barnaby said.

            “We are.” Kotetsu nodded.

            “Well the-,” Barnaby laughed. “Well then you’re going to have to stop kissing me like that!” Barnaby tucked an errant lock of hair behind Kotetsu’s ear. “It just makes me want you more.”

            Kotetsu’s face somehow got hotter than it already was and he pressed his forehead to Barnaby’s chest.

            “Hah...you’re right.” He sighed and rolled off of Barnaby onto the mattress. “Sorry, I got a little carried away.”

            “Oh, I didn’t mind.” Barnaby tittered. “You should definitely remember what you were doing for the future.”

            “Heh,” Kotetsu moved so he was lying on his side, facing his partner – boyfriend? He hadn’t really asked. “I will.” He winked.

            “You are incorrigible sometimes.” Barnaby, now also lying on his side, faced Kotetsu and leaned in for a kiss. “Good night, Kotetsu.”

            “Good night, Bunny. I l-” Kotetsu stopped short.

            “Hm? What was that?” Barnaby asked.

            “Just good night!” Kotetsu was smiling, but mentally he was slamming a brake pedal, hoping Barnaby didn’t notice the slip of his tongue. He reminded himself that he had decided that saying ‘I love you’ now would be too fast. But it seemed the habit he had formed long ago with Tomoe had other plans.

            “Okay.” Barnaby took Kotetsu’s right hand and brought it to his lips, kissing it gently on the knuckles. “Good night.”

            They fell asleep like that, hand in hand and face to face. The last thing the other saw before closing their eyes.

 

***

 

            Barnaby stirred sometime in the early morning. The window was still dark and Kotetsu’s clock seemed to read a time with only three digits. Barnaby couldn’t see exactly which digits without his glasses. Kotetsu shifted in his sleep and seemed to be mumbling something. Maybe that’s what woke him up.

            Barnaby propped himself up to get a better, albeit still blurry, look at Kotetsu’s sleeping face. When he continued to mumble, Barnaby brought his ear closer in an effort to hear what it was.

            “Bunny...” the sleeping Kotetsu mumbled. Barnaby hadn’t been expecting that. He glanced to the side. He knew Kotetsu wouldn’t answer but...

            “Yes, Kotetsu-san?” Barnaby whispered back.

            “I love you.”

            “Oh,” Barnaby gasped, but quickly stopped himself from making any more noise. He watched Kotetsu tentatively, fearing the sound had woken him. When Kotetsu started snoring, Barnaby let out the breath he’d been holding and smiled. _That_ was definitely what had woke him up. He leaned over to gently kiss Kotetsu’s forehead.

            “I love you, too.”

            Barnaby nestled back down beside Kotetsu and took his hand in his own once again. He drifted back to sleep with a smile on his face.

 


End file.
